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Eating With Others Who Don't Have The Lap Band



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Is it just me? Since i got the band when ihave to eat with others i think they all eat like pigs

at 3 and 1/2 months or so i am eating moslty normal foods now...i find it's weird with friends when you eat so much less them they do (i used to be the one who ate everything on my plate, the bread and crumbs on the table ect) now i get a Soup or if it's family style everyone wonders at the end why we have so many leftovers....

i don't realy enjoy eating with others as i can't use my timer and have to count in my head

its ok when you are talking between bites

But eventually the others all dig in and you have to just eat a little and stop

I am jealous of how others can still eat…I know it’s wrong and silly but when I gee others munching on something I used to love it hurts

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Nope, not just you. I posted about this last month. LOL! I am amazed at how fast and how much everyone eats now. I am very aware of it since i eat alot less and have to chew, chew, chew my food. oh and they take these huge bites, it kills me.

I am too sometimes jealous that they get to gourge themselves silly at holiday dinners, but then again, i am not cause i am not going to gain the weight like everyone else will. i just a little bit of everything so i don't feel left out. :)

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I like to eat with others. it makes it easier for me to slow down, 'cause we are all talking. I guess I tend to over chew when I am with people but that is not a bad thing!

I also know that in order to "make it in the real world" I need to trust that my "new" eating behavior will save me from returning to the old fat world, one meal at a time!!!

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I get grossed out by the size bites people take....mainly my dh. What he eats in 2 bites is my whole meal.

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Serving portions are outragous! No wonder why there are soo many heavy weights. I have a hard time eating in front of people. I feel like they stare at my plate, then look at me and think wtf?! She must get 2nds and 3rds.

I've learned to not take home leftovers....there is no point. Sometimes I dont even want to eat with people. I have to eat super slow so it takes me longer, or if the food is really over done I have a harder time and might not eat at all. Especially with office luncheons....It looks like I toss my meal everytime (and it makes me feel bad still). Protein Drinks are a must! I get really tired of the 'fills' and its a small concern now but if we ever wanna move outa Cali (which we definately will someday) how will I get 'fills' or anything then?

I seem to learn more and more as time goes by.

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Eating with others doesnt bother me because I look at it as a time to socialize not think about food. I dont care how much they eat because they have to deal with that. I just think how fortunate I am not to have to stuff my face til I am over full anymore and how much a disgrace I use to be to myself.

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I started dating a new man recently. We went out to dinner the other night and I honestly thought I was going to throw up watching him eat. He ordered fish and chips and ate every bite....5 big pieces of battered, fried fish, fries, slaw, bread basket....It was repulsive! It wasn't him so much as the thought that I used to eat like that that disgusted me!

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Eating with others doesnt bother me because I look at it as a time to socialize not think about food. I dont care how much they eat because they have to deal with that. I just think how fortunate I am not to have to stuff my face til I am over full anymore and how much a disgrace I use to be to myself.

Exactly. I think this is the healthy way to look at it. I also dont bother with leftovers, they're never that good reheated anyway and thinking you have to get your money's worth out of food is a fat way of thinking. Eating with others is more about socialising.

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Everyone is different ! So are there eating habits.

If you excepted that before, then there is no sense in Judging them for the way they eat now.

I have been criticized for not eating enough. I always tell those kind of people "you mind your plate, and I'll mind mine."

It works ! I don't Judge other people, because some can eat all day, and never gain a ounce. I can look at a piece of chocolate Cake, and gain 5 Lbs....

That's the way it goes....

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I agree I'm only 1 week post op but what pp; eat is outragous!!

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I don't like eating with other people because I feel like I'm paying less attention to my chewing and the size of my bites, plus I am apt to eat more than I should because of peer pressure. Plus it takes me twice as long to eat a quarter of the food and I feel rushed! I try to time it so that I finish at the same time as everyone else, but it doesn't always work. It's just another thing to get used to I guess.

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Be careful with these thoughts they can become compulsive! I am in therapy working out these exact thoughts right now. I became obsessed & repulsed by the way & how much others ate. It got to the point that when we left a resturant I could tell you how much food everyone @ other tables within sight of me had ate & how fast.

I have actually been advised by my therapist to not go out to eat @ resturants if @ all possible b/c of my anxiety it would cause.

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I go out to eat with friends and family all the time. I really don't pay attention to what anyone else eats or drinks. I do my thing at my own pace and take home what I can't finish. For me it's about the conversation and fun.

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Serving portions are outragous! No wonder why there are soo many heavy weights.

My wife(gastric bypass) an I now order 1 dinner and share it. The portions look like they are being served on a garbage can lid! the plates are HUGE! The servers look at the food left over and always ask "didn't you like the food? " Some places charge us a "plate" fee of 3-4 dollars! Went to dinner with my sister & bil, he ordered a 20oz ribeye, that hunk of meat looked like a pot roast!

Once food stops being your best friend your view of food changes. I still love to eat but I have learned to savor and really enjoy the flavors and textures of food.

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Some days, watching people eat makes me gag.

Especially my hubby. Love him but can't eat with him anymore. I've been losing and he's been gaining. Ugh.

At thanksgiving dinner I ate by myself so I wouldn't have to watch any of my inlaws gorge themselves (they don't know I've been banded!). Will do the same at Christmas too. Usually my 4-year-old daughter is stuck to me like white on rice, so she's the only one that I can eat with and not want to hurl.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      1. LeighaTR

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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