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Sex After Lap Band Surgery



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I am three weeks away from my banding surgery. It's funny how right now, although my diet is not restricted yet, I have no desire to eat things I shouldn't. My mind and body are SO ready for the surgery. I've even spent months learning to chew correctly...realizing that I've spent my life INHALING my food.< /p>

My weight gain started after I had two babies within 17 months, and shortly after that broke my back. I found out I had Disc Degenerative Disease and that my back issues would continue to worsen. Since breaking my back in 2004, I've been sedate and have literally given up on my body, as I felt betrayed by this disease. At the age of 34 I had the back of an 85 year old. But now I'm 40, and I want to reclaim my health. I am TIRED of carrying around 180 extra pounds. It's making my back problems much worse, let alone killing my self-esteem.

One thing I worry about...is sex. How long after surgery did you wait before you "split the sheets"? My husband is awesome. He loved me when we got married and I was 118 pounds, and loves me now that I'm a marble with a head. One thing that is important is being intimate. I know not being intimate makes my husband perceive that I'm upset with him. (Stop laughing.)

I know that penetration does not equal intimacy, but it's clear that my husband finds it the best source of intimacy. (Sorry if this is TMI.) Any advice on what to expect? (Provided there aren't surgical complications.)

I appreciate sharing of experiences...because it gives me hope and strength.

Angela

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i had no problems having sex within 2-3 weeks of surgery. This is TMI but you may want to be a "topper" instead of a bottomer just to be safe for a while. Your torso may be sore for several weeks and you don't want to dislodge your port - although that thing should be sewn in there good. HAVE FUN!B)

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LOL....most women would love to have a sex "pass" :lol:

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I asked my doctor this during my first visit. His answer was "depends how crazy you want to get!" I was banded on Oct 27th and we "split the sheets" when the staple were out after 10 days.

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I am three weeks away from my banding surgery. It's funny how right now, although my diet is not restricted yet, I have no desire to eat things I shouldn't. My mind and body are SO ready for the surgery. I've even spent months learning to chew correctly...realizing that I've spent my life INHALING my food.

My weight gain started after I had two babies within 17 months, and shortly after that broke my back. I found out I had Disc Degenerative Disease and that my back issues would continue to worsen. Since breaking my back in 2004, I've been sedate and have literally given up on my body, as I felt betrayed by this disease. At the age of 34 I had the back of an 85 year old. But now I'm 40, and I want to reclaim my health. I am TIRED of carrying around 180 extra pounds. It's making my back problems much worse, let alone killing my self-esteem.

One thing I worry about...is sex. How long after surgery did you wait before you "split the sheets"? My husband is awesome. He loved me when we got married and I was 118 pounds, and loves me now that I'm a marble with a head. One thing that is important is being intimate. I know not being intimate makes my husband perceive that I'm upset with him. (Stop laughing.)

I know that penetration does not equal intimacy, but it's clear that my husband finds it the best source of intimacy. (Sorry if this is TMI.) Any advice on what to expect? (Provided there aren't surgical complications.)

I appreciate sharing of experiences...because it gives me hope and strength.

Angela

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Since having my surgery, I have had sex once with my husband, granted I am barely 2 wks out from having my surgery done. At first I was like you won't like me cause I am going to be different, blah blah blah. He told me he loves me regardless. He loved me when he met me, married me and he loves me even more now! Having the surgery is a head game because it is a major life change, but it is sooooo worth it in the long run.

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I'd say about two weeks and if he has a prominent belly, yes, maybe you should be on top. No worries!

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We did it after 1 week, i can't wait that long and neither can he :) LOL

we were just careful and took it slow, he was so worried that he was going to hurt me, he still thinks he will somehow! you do it when you are ready! :)

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for me and my bf we had sex about a month after surgery due to that i was on bedrest and was told to me really careful what i do, but even now a year after surgery ive notice because ive lost alot of weight the port is more closer to the surface of the skin and can easily be felt so if he has me laying down ( sorry if tmi) i have to have more cushing under me jus so that it doesnt get really sore, but he works with me and always make sure im comfatable and im okay, plus hes always kissing me where my scar is and tell me its a beauitful choice i made

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You'll be having surgery on my one year bandiversary. Congratulations!!! It didn't even occur to me to ask my doctor how long I was supposed to wait to resume sexual activity, and it was never brought up in my post op instructions. My husband and I resumed four days post op, I felt well enough to do it, so we did :) Good luck to you on your journey!!!

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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