New/ Excited /Terrified and a whole other mess of emotions!

I got my surgery date today for 6/30/11 (fingers crossed for the FINAL ok from the insurance)! This is going to be long winded but I am really glad I have found this forum of people that truly understand! I decided on LapBand as a last resort. I have tried everything gone up and down 70 lbs here and there but have never been able to maintain it. My goal was to be thin by the time my daughter started Kindergarten in order to avoid embarrassment for her – that came and went…. Then my goal was to be skinny by my 30^th b-day – that is in two weeks….. I have now decided that instead of moping about 30 I am going to make a change for me that is lasting.

I started nutrition counseling back in February and even through the counseling, I was not 100% sure that this is what I wanted to do. Last month, I made the firm decision to proceed and now I can’t wait to start a new life at 30! I am terrified of surgery so I am hoping that part goes smoothly. I am also terrified of giving up food. I know I can do it… Someone else on here described it as getting a divorce from your best friend or something similar. I cannot agree more with this statement! I am addicted to food….. It is there for me. I have been slightly panicked about not being able to eat this or that…. I am hoping that the surgery will ease that constant want for food. I am trying my best to make a lot of changes prior to surgery so that I am not in a complete panic after. Then there is always the lingering question of “what if it doesn’t work?”

Any advice, thoughts, support, etc. is greatly appreciated. I have a great support system; however, the majority of them are thin so while they are GREAT they can’t really understand the full struggle with weight and food!