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Today, I feel...profoundly happy! Since I began my weight loss journey on June 26, 2010. I have lost a total of 51 lbs. and a total of 25.5 inches from my body!!! Just sitting down here and actually calculating all of this made me realize just how far I have come! I guess in the day to day grind of everything you lose focus of how much one has accomplished. I often feel like I should be doing more or losing more but, when I see numbers like these it makes me realize I am way too hard on myself. I should be proud of myself! I AM PROUD OF MYSELF! =)

It is strange because when I look at myself in the mirror...I really don't "SEE" it. Yeh, I "KNOW" that I have went from a size 26 jeans fitting too tight to wearing a size 18 now. I know my clothes fit totally different now. I know that the scale goes down each time I step on it. But, for some reason my mind has not made that connection! I still can't "SEE" it in my mind. It is crazy! I really hope to one day get to the point of where my mind is where my body is. I want to be one with myself and actually be able to put my progress into a realization for my mind. I want to "SEE" it!

I know I have been extremely lucky to have had only two fills and to have great restriction. I realize I have REALLY been lucky to have lost what weight I have considering I have not really been exercising like I should for the past couple of months. I have been so busy taking care of my Mom that I once again...put myself and my health on the backburner. I am recommitting myself to myself for the new year! I am going to HAVE to put myself first, my health first! I am definitely going to get started exercising again. I feel great when I exercise! These winter doldrums have definitely gotten me down but, I will do it! I plan on making 2011 my best year yet! Hope everyone has a Merry Christmas and a Healthy New Year! =)

P.S.

I was just wondering for those of you who have been on this journey longer than I...When was your moment that you actually could "SEE" all of your progress? When did your mind actually "catch up" to where you are now?

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i was just talking to my sister about this last night. she thinks i look perfect the way i am but i'm not quite in the normal BMI stage right now so i'm determined to keep going with the weight loss until i think i look good.

BUT i'm not sure i'll ever look in the mirror and think i look good. i still see the fat me and that worries me.

on the brighter side, i went shopping about a month ago and was taking on the task of trying on jeans. i DISPISE trying on jeans. there happened to be a pair of jeans already in the dressing room when i went in and they were "skinny jeans"... a size 8. i laughed to myself and decided to try them on for shits and giggles. i was completely surprised when they actually fit.... not tight fitting but truly fitting!!

that was my defining moment and it took me 2 + years to really "get" that i'm really getting skinny!

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I am dealing with this right now. I had surgery 7 months ago and I am down 88 pounds (5 pounds from doctor goal of 169, I am 5'7"). And I still see myself as fat. Everyone around me is saying how great I look but I still don't see it. Some days I catch a glimpse and think I look pretty good but most often I feel like I need to lose another 20 pounds, so I am going to try. But I am afraid my head will never catch up and I may never be happy about my weight no matter how small I get.

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I really like this author and his books. They come with a self-hypnosis CD. I have "I can Make You Thin" and just ordered "I Can Make You Confident" on Amazon. Maybe give it a try

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1402769229/ref=pd_lpo_k2_dp_sr_1?pf_rd_p=1278548962&pf_rd_s=lpo-top-stripe-1&pf_rd_t=201&pf_rd_i=0952330830&pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_r=1Z5G6WN26S1JY0BPGF2T

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Thanks everyone for your input. It is amazing how strong the mind is! I am really beginning to understand people with anorexia and bulimia. I can see now how easy it is to look in the mirror and not actually "see" what is really there. I always wondered how they could be so thin yet see theirselves as being so fat. Although, I am far from being thin...I hope that I will be able to see myself that way once I really get there! It just seems like it would be a shame to have worked so hard for it and not be able to enjoy it because of some freaking mental block!

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    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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