Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Are You Telling People?



Recommended Posts

People are going to be judgemental whether i tell them or not. I'm sure they were judgemental about my weight to begin with and even if they feel negative about the surgery, who cares?!

Perhaps it's just my own personal trait to not really care about the opinion of others. At the end of the day, it's my body and their opinion means nothing!

Now to answer the question, yes i did tell people. I feel very confidant with the decision that I have made and am very proud of myself for getting to where i've gotten. And if there are people along the way who i've told that aren't being supportive, i don't care, because there will be people somewhere else in my support network that do support my journey.

Just gotta let the haters be haters!!!!!!!!! Be proud of your bodies, whether you're still overweight, in the midst of your journey, or at goal :scared2:

Peace Out!!:confused:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Discretion is best especially if you have a sister-in-law and cousin like mine...lol Of course my parents know along with my sister and an aunt. My absolute best girlfriend...1 of my daughters(22) My 8 year old thinks I am having a hernia repair...I knew she would tell everyone at some time so I padded it a little...lol

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've decided to tell everybody! I don't care what others think and most everyone has been incredibly supportive about my decision. I only had one person tell me he thought I was taking the easy way and I basicly said "first of all its not easy and second even if it was what the hell is wrong with that?" I'm super excited I get banded this Thursday. The pre-op diet is sucking. I'm ready to change my life! Good luck to everyone ! :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've seen the "don't tell" side because my honey told only a few friends and no family. When the mix of those who knew and those who didn't would get together, it was always bad fearing one who knew would tell one who didn't.

Also, people would ask me if honey had gastric bypass, I could say "no" honestly since it was lap band. But seeing all the worry about keeping it secret was bad.

I have a pretty small family thank goodness lol. I have told almost everyone I am close to.

Luckily, nothing negative (yet). But I know at my first family gathering, my nephews wife will be smart about it. She might be walking funny when they leave, because I plan to chew her ass up if she does lol.

When I hear of someone saying "you took the easy way out" I get a mental pic in my head of a gravestone with... "here lies so and so, died due to issues from morbid obesity.... at least she/he didn't take the easy way out!" engraved on it.

Side note: The people who talk to smokers saying "why don't you quit, it's bad for you" are just as bad. If you are guilty of that, you are making a smoker feel the exact same way you feel when someone says "why don't you just diet and exercise".

Can't wait for my surgery! I've been messing with preop stuff almost all of 2010!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

So I have only told my husband. I just can't right now. My surgery is Sept 27 and I worry that if something happens it's a bad way for people to find out but I just can't. I live in a community and my friends are all super fit, healthy all natural types. I have a lot in common with them except the skinny. But these people frown on allopathic solutions. I just can't. I feel that skinny people don't need to know. As far as family goes I'm not telling them now. My side of the family actually does struggle with weight and I will tell them once the weight loss happens- they live like 3 hours away so I have time- like xmas 2011- ha. my husband's side I can't imagine telling them at this point. Also way skinnies- I just can't. I too am a contractor so I work from home, so co workers aren't an issue. my support is my husband and you all.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It is up to the individual. Most people have been supportive, if curious. I think my Best girl friends are a little in awe...they are obese too, but adamantly say they would never do it. One is afraid of surgery, the other feels it is the "easy way". My answer was "It was way easier getting fatter by the day". LOL

I find the skinnies are horrified by the 1/2 cup meals. The fatties at least get it b/c they get the idea of Portion Control, something the skinnies don't understand.

Pretty much, I am sorry I told so many, but in general I say "kiss my a$$" inside...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My husband is the only one who knows that I am trying to get approved outside of 3 girlfriends who have either had wls or is also trying to get approved. I just don't see the need to tell anyone until I know if I'll be approved. I have been working on my approval for the last three months and am praying everything goes through. I see no reason I should be denied, but insurance companies are so unpredictable that I'm trying not to get too excited until I know for sure.

I don't know that I'll tell anyone if I get approved, I'm not really thinking that far ahead. I'm not ashamed that I need wls to be successful in my desire to be fit and healthy, but I don't know that I want to be the poster child for it either. I guess I'll decide if and when I get banded. I should know one way or the other next week! :(

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have not intentions of telling anyone. So far the only person I've told is my thoughts. Not even my husband or kids. My Oldest son is smart enough to see me on websites, and sine I have to have a surgery in the future I think I may keep this one ot myself. Not sure if that's the right thing but it what I've decided.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Summer- will you tell your husband if you go thru with it? Not judging, curious how you will keep that to yourself. You have sparked my interest.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have also only told a few people. I think I'm going to keep it like that until I am more comfortable to start telling people or maybe I won't tell anyone else who doesn't need to know. So if you want to keep it with just a few people knowing and thats what makes you happy do it!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I guess the most important thing is that everyone think about their decision what ever it may be. Just like we made the very thought filled decision to get the surgery, its the same way for deciding to tell or not to tell. I think its a bigger decision then some people may think.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have told a few people -- my husband and kids, my parents & brother, & BF. My big social network is my church and several people there have had GBP but I don't know of anyone else who has had the band. (Maybe they're not telling, either.)

I don't want to be the token bander whom everyone will compare with the fast-losing GBP losers. I am very comfortable with my decision to go this way and to have a slower and steady loss but don't want every time I walk into church to be about my WLS. That's sure not why I go!

Since I have a pretty long pre-op diet (6 weeks), I'll lose weight the old fashioned way even before my surgery so they'll just think I have FINALLY found the strength for life-style changes that I've tried to make all my life. Once it's "old news", I won't really care who knows because I'm sure there will be people out there whom I might encourage by sharing my story.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I told friends and family. Family is very upset with my weight loss and are not talking to me!!!!!!!! How childish is that, they need to loose a bunch too!!! I am proud of what i have done and don't regret a minute of it, so there!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

i have told my mom,dad,uncles,grandmother, friends at work, boss, mother in law, husband... my mom has told some of her good friends, and some random poeple we don't really no. I haven't heard any negative comments at all. at least not to my face. everyone has been really supportive and happy for me. Some of the people at work know I am not supper close to but they haven't acted any differently and seem to kind of ignore it. I am glad that I have told everyone I am around on a daily basis because it will help me be accountible. That just me, I think it is a personal situation and everyone has different relationships... at my old job there is NO WAY i would have told anyone. but I work in a medical setting and everyone is pretty familiar and sees lots of patients going through this so it wasnt as strange or a big deal at all.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

:rolleyes2:So the only people that know that I am going to get the lap-band is my parents, my sister (and brother in law) and my boyfriend. Not even my brother knows right now (im affraid that he will slip and tell other family members). I told 1 friend that I was considering it months ago, but she doesn't know that I went through the process and already have a surgery date. I may tell other people after I lose some weight but even then, I don't know if I want family and friends to know...

So I was wondering if there were other people who are planning to keep it hush or is everyone telling everyone?

Hi Danielle,

This is all new for me. I attended the seminar on August 17, 2010 and my first group meeting was August 19, 2010. According to the surgeon the insurance coverage that I have doesn't require the 6 or 7 months of weigh in but I am required to attend at least two group meetings. I have been pondering over telling people and I have decided this decision is a personal choice. I will gladly add insight to someone who's considering the procedure but I'm a private person and I would like to keep this choice that way as well. My husband is aware of my decision and so is my mother. They are both very supportive. I'm just going to take each day slowly and wait for my next move.

I wish you luck in your decision I’m just not up for all the negative talk and questions.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • BeanitoDiego

      I changed my profile image to a molecule of protein. Why? Because I am certain that it saved my life.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • eclarke

      Two years out. Lost 120 , regained 5 lbs. Recently has a bout of Norovirus, lost 7 pounds in two days. Now my stomach feels like it did right after my surgery. Sore, sensitive to even water.  Anyone out there have a similar experience?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Eve411

      April Surgery
      Am I the only struggling to get weight down. I started with weight of 297 and now im 280 but seem to not lose more weight. My nutrtionist told me not to worry about the pounds because I might still be losing inches. However, I do not really see much of a difference is this happen to any of you, if so any tips?
      Thanks
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Clueless_girl

      Well recovering from gallbladder removal was a lot like recovering from the modified duodenal switch surgery, twice in 4 months yay 🥳😭. I'm having to battle cravings for everything i shouldn't have, on top of trying to figure out what happens after i eat something. Sigh, let me fast forward a couple of months when everyday isn't a constant battle and i can function like a normal person again! 😞
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • KeeWee

      It's been 10 long years! Here is my VSG weight loss surgiversary update..
      https://www.ae1bmerchme.com/post/10-year-surgiversary-update-for-2024 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×