How important are the rules really?

[LeighaMason 19]

Encouraging others to disregard their Dr's advice is irresponsible. If you want to jeopardize your health that is your option but to promote it to others is wrong. People who are newly banded might read these posts and think that if you did it they should as well and harm themselves. Just because you didn't have immediate effects doesn't mean that you didn't harm yourself, only time will tell.

And quite frankly, on this forum, you get what you project. If you project attitude, you get it back. Just like in real life, if you show up at a social event and start calling people names, it usually doesn't go that well for you, the same thing happens here.

[Astrasmom 1]

I spent alot of time and money on the so called 'yo yo' diets in my life. Yes I did lose the weight but I gained it all back again. Lapband surgery actually DID save my life. I am a heart patient. Hence I owe it all to the doctor that put this thing inside of me that has been used as a tool but has helped me to lose more weight then I ever have, and keep the weight off so far.

I do not beleive in following every single rule that the doctor says I should. Like eating all your veggies, or all your fruit, etc. Following every single rule is like being on a diet. This is not a diet, it's a life style change. You have to reward yourself once and awhile. What I won't do is NOT follow certain things that I have been told could do harm to me. Which include soda, coffee, and drinking from a straw. Soda and drinking from a straw could cause my band to slip. This didn't come from my surgeon. This came from my nutrionist. I see a nutrionist everytime that I go into the office to see the doctor (whether I get a fill or not). My nutrionist told me that we can have alcoholic beverages once and awhile. Red wine is the best because it doesn't have as many open calories and sugar that the other stuff does. I was told that you shouldn't drink that much because you can get drunk very fast. Occasionally I will have a wine cooler also. I do not drink beer anymore. I will on occasion have a hard drink once and awhile too. The key words being "ONCE AND AWHILE".

So my point is, we are here to help each other. We aren't here to judge and we aren't here to criticize each other. You know the saying, "You can lead a horse to Water but you can't make them drink"? Everyone is different. Some of us choose to follow the plan that was given to us. Some of us follow the plan that we want to follow. Either way, if it's working then let it be. I got 'FAT' for a reason. I am NOT going to be 'FAT' again. So my choice is to follow most of what I am supposed to follow. When the word danger comes in the same sentence as soda, caffine and straws, I choose to listen to those warnings. Caffine by the way is a natural Diuretic. It takes 2 glasses of water to replace the fluids that you lose from drinking one cup of coffee. THAT is why I choose to give up coffee 2 months before having surgery. And trust me I was a heavy coffee drinker.

Edited June 20, 2010 by Astrasmom

[Jachut 487]

Encouraging others to disregard their Dr's advice is irresponsible. If you want to jeopardize your health that is your option but to promote it to others is wrong. People who are newly banded might read these posts and think that if you did it they should as well and harm themselves. Just because you didn't have immediate effects doesn't mean that you didn't harm yourself, only time will tell.

I do agree with you in principle, if you're going to see a doctor, then I think you do make a choice to respect his views and follow his advice, and my point in all of this is that its debatable what are "rules" that are important to follow and what are simply personal opinion, viewpoint etc.

I think Astrasmom has said it well - where there's harm involved, rules must be followed - such as the post op diet. For the rest of it, however, this is all only a matter of PERSPECTIVE. What you're saying about newbies reading this and thinking its OK to break the rules is exactly how I feel about all the Protein talk on here for example.

I think its irresponsible to push the shakes, high protein eating, low calorie levels! As we've mentioned about a thousand times, we have a different approach in Australia and I hate how Aussies appear on other(Australian) band forums saying they've been scared off the band becuase of the truly awful diet they think they have to follow after they've visited this forum, I've seen it about a hundred times. I found this forum, researched the band and decided not to go forward with it myself becuase I did not consider a life of Proteins shakes and hardly any fibre in my diet a worthwhile trade off. It took me a lot more research in my own backyard to realise that many other successful bandsters had chosen not to eat that way.

Now, probably 80% of people here are American and eat the American way, which is not wrong or right, simply unique to your culture. We dont eat the same way in Australia as I'm sure they dont in other countries represented here. We each have to find our own way within OUR environments. So if your doctor has a rule about how much protein you should eat, and another doesnt, does that make one of us a rule breaker? Similarly to the Snacks issue - how can any doctor or nutritionist really state that no snacking is the absolute rule for anyone in particular. I do a lot of exercise, I need fuel! I lost weight. I've kept it off. So how can snacking really be wrong? I also eat carbs - my doctor doesnt ban them. Your doctor might. Am I a rule breaker?

See how it differs according to your doctor, your environment, your lifestyle? How can anyone possibly say that adapting something to your own unique circumstances is "breaking rules"?. Above all, this has to be a lifestyle we can maintain forever.

Edited June 20, 2010 by Jachut

[~amy~ 1]

I do agree with you in principle, if you're going to see a doctor, then I think you do make a choice to respect his views and follow his advice, and my point in all of this is that its debatable what are "rules" that are important to follow and what are simply personal opinion, viewpoint etc.

However, this is all only a matter of PERSPECTIVE. What you're saying about newbies reading this and thinking its OK to break the rules is exactly how I feel about all the Protein talk on here.

I think its irresponsible to push the shakes, high protein eating, low calorie levels! As we've mentioned about a thousand times, we have a different approach in Australia and I hate how Aussies appear on other(Australian) band forums saying they've been scared off the band becuase of the truly awful diet they think they have to follow after they've visited this forum, I've seen it about a hundred times. I found this forum, researched the band and decided not to go forward with it myself becuase I did not consider a life of Proteins shakes and hardly any fibre in my diet a worthwhile trade off.

Now, probably 80% of people here are American and eat the American way, which is not wrong or right, simply unique to your culture. We dont eat the same way in Australia as I'm sure they dont in other countries represented here. We each have to find our own way within OUR environments. So if your doctor has a rule about how much protein you should eat, and another doesnt, does that make one of us a rule breaker? Similarly to the Snacks issue - how can any doctor or nutritionist really state that no snacking is the absolute rule for anyone in particular. I do a lot of exercise, I need fuel! I lost weight. I've kept it off. So how can snacking really be wrong? I also eat carbs - my doctor doesnt ban them. Your doctor might. Am I a rule breaker?

See how it differs according to your doctor, your environment, your lifestyle? How can anyone possibly say that adapting something to your own unique circumstances is "breaking rules"?. Above all, this has to be a lifestyle we can maintain forever.

Agree 110%!! :smile2:

[Jachut 487]

Everyone else has said it ... different surgeons have different rules, different people have different success rates based on doing different things that end up being right for them. What's right for one person might not work for someone else, etc. and so on. My surgeon was very up front with me that no one expects 100% perfection in following instructions, that is not life ... but that said, as a band patient you should expect to alter your lifestyle. The instructions are tips to help you figure out how to use your tool as effectively as possible and adapt it to your lifestyle.

This forum is so helpful for that - I pay more attention to the advice in those posts where I look at really amazing ticker numbers on the bottom.

On the other hand, I pay somewhat less attention to the ones that seem to half treat surgery like it's admission to the Church of the Band. We were all overweight to begin with, and it bothers me that post-band some people seem to start to sound as if they feel they are "better" or more "ethical" than others ... it's not a moral issue, it's not a competition between forum members. Am I the only one who notices there is almost a note of anger sometimes from posters who "follow the rules" towards posters who say they don't follow certain rules? Either answer the question, or don't, but why get angry at or sarcastic towards someone for asking a question? If they don't lose weight, it will be their own issue ... it's not like they are sinners.

Lol, I agree with this too, but I feel just as strongly that following rules is not the path to success.

I think we all do what works for us and because it works, we all feel it must be right. And that's not a moralistic judgement, its a real desire to share the "secret" we've discovered.

Well, that's how I feel anyway. I feel really "cured" of obesity in so many ways by ditching dieting and rules and such and I want to share that with others.

[btrieger 21]

I am fat because I did what I thought was right and I knew more than the doctors and nutritionists.

I'm losing weight because I realized that I don't know more than the doctors and nutritionists and I am following their direction.

If I don't agree with the rules they set or have questions I ask. For the most part, they are willing to alter the rules for me.

Therefore, I'm not breaking them.

As for the church of the band comment. That is the crutch that some folks require in order to be successful. Just like real church.

[elcee 3,343]

If I don't agree with the rules they set or have questions I ask. For the most part, they are willing to alter the rules for me.

Therefore, I'm not breaking them.

I totally agree. It is always better to discuss something with your Dr than to just make up your own rules based on information that you have gathered from various sites on the net.

A good example is the soda thing. I was chatting to my fill Dr the one day and said that I thought we weren't supposed to drink it.She was the one that told me that so long as it doesn't cause me any discomfort it is fine. Apparently some people find the carbonation too uncomfortable after banding but everyone is different.

I have no problem with questioning what you have been told but I do have a problem when people have a total disregard for the Dr and decide to ignore their advice and just make up their own rules because they think that they know better.

[joho 0]

I do agree with you in principle, if you're going to see a doctor, then I think you do make a choice to respect his views and follow his advice, and my point in all of this is that its debatable what are "rules" that are important to follow and what are simply personal opinion, viewpoint etc.

I think Astrasmom has said it well - where there's harm involved, rules must be followed - such as the post op diet. For the rest of it, however, this is all only a matter of PERSPECTIVE. What you're saying about newbies reading this and thinking its OK to break the rules is exactly how I feel about all the Protein talk on here for example.

I think its irresponsible to push the shakes, high Protein eating, low calorie levels! As we've mentioned about a thousand times, we have a different approach in Australia and I hate how Aussies appear on other(Australian) band forums saying they've been scared off the band becuase of the truly awful diet they think they have to follow after they've visited this forum, I've seen it about a hundred times. I found this forum, researched the band and decided not to go forward with it myself becuase I did not consider a life of Proteins shakes and hardly any fibre in my diet a worthwhile trade off. It took me a lot more research in my own backyard to realise that many other successful bandsters had chosen not to eat that way.

Now, probably 80% of people here are American and eat the American way, which is not wrong or right, simply unique to your culture. We dont eat the same way in Australia as I'm sure they dont in other countries represented here. We each have to find our own way within OUR environments. So if your doctor has a rule about how much protein you should eat, and another doesnt, does that make one of us a rule breaker? Similarly to the Snacks issue - how can any doctor or nutritionist really state that no snacking is the absolute rule for anyone in particular. I do a lot of exercise, I need fuel! I lost weight. I've kept it off. So how can snacking really be wrong? I also eat carbs - my doctor doesnt ban them. Your doctor might. Am I a rule breaker?

See how it differs according to your doctor, your environment, your lifestyle? How can anyone possibly say that adapting something to your own unique circumstances is "breaking rules"?. Above all, this has to be a lifestyle we can maintain forever.

Excellent post. Agree 100%.

Jo

[Marine mom 3]

Asking questions or stating opinions is not encouraging anyone to do anything. If someone is stupid enough to read one post from a stranger on a message board and copy their behavior, they deserve whatever they get.

BT, i have yo yo'ed too, but it has almost always been on the advice of the medical field or other expert.

I agree with Jackie. I would never live a life dependant upon Protein drinks every day. I eat well rounded whole foods and have for 20 years. My weight came from a whacked out thyroid my first pregnancy. It took that awesome, we gotta trust em' medical field, 10 years to diagnose and treat it, and that was only after I went in to yet another doc and demanded the test. The nurse had the gall to pat me on the hand and say "it would be nice if all that weight could be blamed on your thyroid dear." I don't take anything the medical field says as gospel. There are docs out there who use dangerous unhealthy means to claim "the best results." Ethics in this field suck. Money is the object. Anytime money is the object I question everything, study on my own, and make my decisions.

Whether the OP was trolling for trouble, or just curious about the choices of others is not in itself a problem in my book. It isn't worth nasty, rude, snobbish, or the elite attitudes shown. It is about conversation. No more, no less. Had a friend asked the same, would you all have responded in the same manner?

i have to add that some of the people with whom I am disagreeing with in this particular thread are some of the people i usually agree with most. I think that you, Betsy give some of the best common sense advice around. It is like the real world. I don't know anyone I agree with 100%, and wouldn't really want too!

Edited June 20, 2010 by MissyMS

[Humming Bird 275]

Hi SavvyCat,

Look at what you started ! LOL :smile2:

I hope the passion that all the posters on this thread have doesn't make you shy away from LBT. Stick around. Jump in on other threads. Post a blog. Just stick around. It is really a helpful site.

Edited June 20, 2010 by Humming Bird

[AnneGG 0]

Hi SavvyCat,

Look at what you started ! LOL :smile2:

I hope the passion that all the posters on this thread have doesn't make you shy away from LBT. Stick around. Jump in on other threads. Post a blog. Just stick around. It is really a helpful site.

I agree, and my strong request is that there be space for opinions and disagreements without personal attack. Just doesn't contribute much to forward movement...

I think the field of bariatric surgery is too young to know all of what actually works yet.

There are many paths to the same goal, and I will always consider outcome the most important aspect. What actually works. Tickers are a good indication of that, and hopefully people are losing weight in a healthy manner.

[~amy~ 1]

I agree, and my strong request is that there be space for opinions and disagreements without personal attack. Just doesn't contribute much to forward movement...

I think the field of bariatric surgery is too young to know all of what actually works yet.

There are many paths to the same goal, and I will always consider outcome the most important aspect. What actually works. Tickers are a good indication of that, and hopefully people are losing weight in a healthy manner.

AMEN TO THAT!!!! :smile2:

[elcee 3,343]

This is seriously weird. Just got an email with a reply to this thread from Savvy to herself which has now disappeared!

[juliansmom2003 3]

I saw it too Elcee. I wish one of the MODs would just delete this thread already.

[YoungBlackAndBanded 0]

This is seriously weird. Just got an email with a reply to this thread from Savvy to herself which has now disappeared!

LMAO!!! Me too. I think she realized that the post, where she was pretending to be a supporter, was submitted under her name.

Such a shame....

Edited June 21, 2010 by Jonelle143