green

Yup, I can relate. This is why a number of professions, most notably the helping professions, were closed to me. I am impatient and I have anger issues.

I definitely want to go to your part of the world, Kat.

A friend of mine has a son who is doing post-doc work in entomology and he has lived in a lot of exotic bug-infested tropical areas doing field work, places like the Amazon and Borneo. He currently works at a university in Australia. You may well end up living a similar life, you know, and then you can send us dispatches from weird and wonderful swamps, rain forests, and the like.

I have been to Nepal and found it very beautiful. We did this when on a tour which also covered certain cities in India. Going by tour made the experience less strenuous for us because they did all the logistics of humping us from place to place, ensuring we had rooms in nice hotels, and that we got to see and learn a great deal in a short period of time. It was a wonderful trip but it was taxing in that the locals view strangers as walking treasure chests. You simply cannot walk in public without being beseiged by beggars and people wanting to sell you things and all of these people are most persistant. India is a country where timidly polite Canadians learn to get in touch with their inner rudeness. Nepal was very relaxing after this, and is very beautiful as well. The food in both countries was fabulous if you are a fan of Indian cuisine. Both my husband and I do like travelling in exotic places. We want to get as far away from home as possible when we travel. We really do want everything to be utterly different, the food, the architecture, the people and the way they dress and lead their lives, the landscapes. This has the effect of emotionally and intellectually waking us up and allowing us to see life with new eyes. Even when we take one of those all inclusive beach vacations in Mexico we pick a resort which is either in or within walking distance of a Mexican town, not one which is isolated in a hotel zone.

Green promises not to lose her sense of humour until she has senile dementia - then all bets are off because Green herself will be in anutha zone. She was hoping to be put on an ice floe at this point but now that we have Global Warming this will not be an option. :think So much for leaving with dignity, eh.

Nice to hear from you again, Ms Dad. We've been missing you, ya know. P.S. Don't diss the Green, eh. :heh:

Congratulations. Moving from W to R is a really big deal. :clap2::clap2::clap2::clap2::clap2:

I am inclined to agree with Chickie and those posters who follow her. Certainly no child, nor adult for that matter, is ever prepared to engage in the rigors of fighting cancer. This is something which is thrust upon an individual and it is always unwanted and terrible. The thing about cancer is that the patient will be helped by professionals along the awful road which he or she must follow. Bandsters are not in this situation. We choose to arrange to have our hardware implanted and we do receive training in the band rules. From this point on our contacts with our banding team generally have to do with the business of fills and defills and depend upon us taking the initiative to consult with our bariatric team. We are certainly not carefully monitored during our weight loss process. This is our responsibility. It is for this reason that our situation differs oh so much from the individual who is under medical care for cancer. This girl has received the band and she and her mum have likely had training in the bandster rules. As we all know, it then becomes our responsibility to follow these rules. This is why, Michee, a number of us are expressing our distress and concern over this particular case. We don't believe that this kid has yet acquired the maturity and drive to monitor herself and we believe that her mum simply doesn't understand that for the band to be both effective and safe the kid is going to have to be careful about such things as not pushing her food intake and avoiding sodas, junk foods, etc. It is interesting that you view the issues which hook onto this biz of weight control and cancer as being akin. I have got to confess that I have often felt, albeit on an emotional level, pretty much the same way. We all know that cancer can kill but we also know that cancer results when cells run amok; as my body began to grow fatter and fatter I had very much the same sense that my body was out of control, that it was running amok. I found this both humliating and frightening.

Hah hah. Would that the balding pubis resembled a Brazilian wax job but the sad truth that the site is more likely to look like an old geezer's skull. There are an array of the crinklies but these are kinda sparse. Think of a lawn after a drought. You will see a few the odd spears of green poking up here and there. Oh, ugh! Signs of life, I guess....

I have gotten the pregnancy question but it has never bothered me. This is because I went through menopause when I was 41 and because I enjoy embarassing people. And so I would always laugh and announce to them that that ship had long since sailed, that I am post-menopausal and just fat is all. The big pay-off for me was watching them blush and grovel and try to appologise. :heh:

Derbygirl speaks the truth. It is always surprising, painful, and depressing how a change in your life will cost you some of your best friends forever. When I got married I suddenly lost all my single friends and when I divorced the married ones dropped off the map. When I was off work for 3 years because of major depression I lost contact with almost all of my work pals and now that I am retired I am in contact with only three of my former work friends. Over the years I have lost a number of best friends forever and each time I lost one it took me several years to recover from the pain of their rejection of me and my love for them. I often think that it is easier to recover from a romance gone bad. And yup, often they will try to sabotage you before they leave. My last BFF, a single woman, tried to ruin my relationship with my mate.

I asked my doc about this and she felt that it didn't make sense. She said that reflux sufferer is suffering from stomach acids and vinegar is another acid. I haven't tried this remedy myself.

I used to work with a loveable young woman whose husband had a gambling problem. He gambled away their house and left them with nothing. She was a very big woman and, I believe, had some health issues associated with this. Although she worked in a non-traditional job, building aircraft, she dreamed of having a family and a nest. When she finally found her man and got married she was absolutely thrilled and we were all happy for her. She had difficulties getting pregnant but finally succeeded and once again she was so very happy. Her pregnancy was an extremely difficult one and she was told that she would be unable to have another child. Nevertheless she did manage to have a healthy little girl. And again we were all very pleased for her. Her life seemed to be going well and she was content. You can easily imagine her feelings of devastation and betrayal when she lost her nest through her husband's behaviour. His gambling had left them bankrupt. She even had to sell her car. She was unable to forgive him. She and the child moved out and for some period of time shared a place with another single mum. I find myself telling you this story in order to let you know that you are not alone. I saw my colleague's shock and pain and the chaos that her life became and my heart goes out to you. You are in a difficult place right now.

I've never been to Oklahoma which does sound like a beautiful state. In fact the only places in the States where I have been are Florida and New York City. I visited NYC when I was in my early teens and only saw Brooklyn which is where my relatives lived. My parents once took a 6 week long road trip through the States and they absolutely loved it. They found America to be a fascinating country. The idea of a road trip like theirs has long been a fantasy of mine. I figure that the hubby and I will do this at some point in the future. We've chosen to see exotic third world countries while our health is up to it. We do plan to travel in those places which have all the mod cons when we are older and want/need them. This is when we will travel Canada, another country which I haven't seen much of even though I hold the passport. Ironically, my husband got the worst case of food poisoning in Halifax, Canada and we didn't bother to bring our collection of travel meds with us. Go figure, eh....

Although I have never been to Hawaii I have been to a few places in Italy. I have been in Florence a few times and in Rome once. If I were you I would be inclined to go to Italy. The countryside is beautiful and there is, of course, a great deal of culture to see and enjoy and marvel at, something which the old countries alone can provide us. I would love to go back and see more of Italy. The Italians also have a very sensuous and respectful attitude towards food. I ate well while I was in Italy. In fact I prefer Italian food to French. I was living in France at the time. We have a huge Italian community living in Toronto and its suburbs and it was surprising how many Italians I met while I was in Italy who wanted to know if I knew their Canadian relatives. When I was travelling in Italy we stayed in pensiones and did a lot of walking, shopping, hanging out, and went to some of the museums. I suppose that if I were to go back I might end up taking some kind of tour due to my husband's time constraints. In some ways this might be a little sad as it would prevent me from mingling with the local folk. On the other hand I would see much more of those things which are of historical or cultural interest.

Hey, very cool response! :clap2: One of the weirdest reactions I got to my weight loss was when the wife of the cottagers who are neighbours to my parents-in-law came scurrying over squealing that she wanted to see the "half a woman," that her husband had mentioned that there was a "half a woman," next door. This freaked me out because all this time I thought people were paying attention to my personality and intelligence. Silly, self-deluded me. :girl_hug: I did tell her exactly how I loss the weight, however, and then she said that she knew of people who had had that kind of surgery and within 2 years they had gained it all back. Whatever......... This September I am going to have a face lift. It will be interesting to monitor her reactions next summer, eh. :heh:

You sound like a lovely and noble person, Lawanda. It is too bad that your mum doesn't see that. It is funny how often the least appreciated child so often steps up to the plate when a parent runs into trouble. You may wish to point out to her that you are the only one who is there for her. Though she is living with you my advice to you still stands: you must separate yourself from her emotionally. She does sound like she is toxic. I am very pleased that you are treating yourself to the band and that you are a member of this site. Here you will find tons of practical advice and loads of emotional support. As for the band, this is an excellent weight loss tool. Although I was one of the lower BMI folk I am also an old fart; I was banded last September and I am now at goal weight and have a healthy BMI. The band really does work! Enjoy your band, your weight loss journey, and the support of LBT.

Wendy is right. It is hard to believe, I know, but those skinnies really are not seeing your weight issues while they are obsessing about their own unwanted 5-15 lbs. I know, you see I used to be one of those girls when I was in my 20s. You certainly don't have to have a high BMI to suffer from self-loathing. The technical term for this is body dysphoria. I suspect that most women suffer from it.

Congratulations on your rebanding.

Hooray for BJean!!!!

I deal with mine by using lots of product and never, ever brushing/combing it. I run my fingers through mine is all. Brushing/combing leads to it turning into a giant fuzz ball.

:cryThe only butts that I have seen which resemble mine belong to Polish men. I used to work along side a number of them and so I know what I am talking about. Now, it is true that my father was Polish Jew. I figure there certainly is a little bit of Slavic ancestry there and this has chosen to manifest itself in the shape of my arse, the arse of a Polish dude. And when I was travelling in Russia men would come up to me talking in Slav and say, "Polska?" And I would look at 'em straight in the eye and say, "nyet," which was one of the four words in Russian which I knew. They must have been examining my butt. :faint:

Nana, a good answer to the rude little doctor would have been, "yes, I am fat and you are a midget, but I have the option of losing weight." This is a paraphrase of Winston Churchill's famous response to a lady member of parliament who called him out on being drunk. He acknowledged that he was, then pointed out that she was ugly, and told her that he could sober up. Good luck on your surgery and welcome to bandland.

Yah, real Mexican food is a surprise for us who have previously experienced Tex-Mex. We now have a local Mexican restaurant and my girlfriend ordered tacos. She later admitted that she was kind of surprised/disappointed because they weren't like those at Hernando's Hideaway, our first ever Tex-Mex joint and one where you can get the famous as big as your head burrito. This was a popular place for stoners during the 1970s. The food was cheap, tasty, and the servings were enormous. The tour sounds very interesting. Whenever we go down to Mexico to one of those all-inclusive beach holidays we always sign up for a few tours. These are invariably worth it. The Copper Canyon trip was in fact a tour which started off in Guadalajara. The Copper Canyon is actually a series of canyons and one of them is over a kilometre deep. They are deeper in places than the Grand Canyon but nowhere near as wide. There is a train which runs along the canyons but in order to really see them it is necessary to leave the train and stay at hotels in little villages along the route. From these a bus or jeep will drive you to various interesting spots. Our experience was very strange for it was off-season and we were the only 2 people on the tour. The hotels where we stayed varied from luxe to one which was basic and quite battered. And some of our tour guides only spoke Spanish. The trip was fabulous all the same. And because we were fairly high up and in the interior the air was cooler and very dry and smelled wonderfully of pine. We saw the local indigenous people who live on the hips of the canyons. These are short, squat, shy folk with strong lungs who can walk and run over long distances. They live in clearings and caves and keep chickens. The women weave shawls and baskets and make small carvings which they bashfully sell to tourists. One of the oddest experiences for us Canadians was being proudly shown the local lake by a tour guide who spoke no English. This lake was about the size of a Canadian pond but we knew that this was a big deal because it was a photo op. We had to get out of the jeep! An interesting note for folks who come from the land of water....and take it for granted.

Lawanda, your mother sounds like a foul-tempered and destructive woman. I suspect that because she is jealous, you as a result will never receive her approval and will continue to be hurt by her. This would indicate that you should emotionally disengage yourself from her for your own peace of mind. This is a very, very difficult thing to do; we all crave our parents' love and approval and are left devasted when this is denied us. You sure do have all of my sympathy.