For those of you who have been following, you know I have been struggling with proper food choices. Last night it was 2 christmas cookies followed up with our old nemesis, peanut butter. All this came after a wonderful protein filled dinner which left me satisfied. My first inclination is to just beat the crap out of myself, which always leads to more eating. So instead, I'm going to take a different approach. I did not learn to read, walk, speak all in one day, why should proper eating be learned so quickly?
There must be a learning curve here...a time to grow into my new habits and to grow into my band, so to speak. SO...for todays list, what can I learn from my eating experiences?
1. Peanut butter is the devil and must be exorcized from my house. (or at least goto my kiddos closets as they used it daily for lunches)
2. For right now, at the beginning when things are so difficult, I do not need to bring "treats home for the kids" that's where the Christmas cookies came from...work!
3. I need to get out my knitting or embroidery to do at night after dinner to relieve stress and keep my hands busy.
4. I have an empty band right now, and things will get easier as I find restriction.
Any thing anyone else has learned on this journey would be appreciated.
Live Wild,
Laura
Ok, I'm over weight, I'm fat- I know it, and anyone who can see me knows it as well. Those of you, my online support family if you will- understand the reasoning behind me wanting to get banded- and so, because of that- I thought I would share my non-health reasons... because honestly, I'm not sure if it's amusing, or if it's slightly psychotic! hahahaha!!
-Being able to go places and being the one the guys hit on, not my friends.
-Completely shocking everyone at my high school reunion in 2012
-Having a "fair shot" at actually meeting a man and having a relationship (yea, yea, if he was a decent guy he would see past the fat and see into the me on the inside.... I call BS! lol... And I will be the first to admit- I usually don't find overweight guys attractive- it just doesn't do it for me- so I can completely understand why I dont have guys knocking on my door all the time lol)
-Not being the girl they are talking about when they say "the big girl"
-Painting my own toenails- without getting stomach pains or having to hold my breath while I'm trying to paint them
-Riding more rides with my daughter at the fair, and not being worried that my belly pushes out the safety bar too much that it isn't safe for her
-Seeing my collar bones
It's just the simple things.
I know that I will DEFINITELY have some issues with not being able to see myself as thin- and even if I was able to see myself as thin, I will have to make sure I don't let it get to my head. Hell, I've been fat since I was like 5, so I want to enjoy being thin and having confidence- I just pray that I dont get cocky with it- because I've always hated when others were that way!!!
As of now I've been telling basically everyone about my lap-band, they are MOSTLY supportive- but i've run into those who are not as well. After I actually have it done, I may be a little more picky as to who I tell. For now, I still have more of the pre-op process to get through...
On the average,How long does one have to wait till everything is accepted through the insurance until they actually get scheduled for there surgery,I kinda guess as to the time limit but im not positive, I hate waiting it brings on unwanted pressure and causes me headache..I know waiting is a part of life and the saying is if its worth having its worth waiting for.......
I'm scheduled to have my lap band surgery on the 20th. I started my pre op diet yesterday and am struggling... I stay with a head ache, I'm always hungry and have no energy to do anything. Any suggestions on how to get through the next 2 weeks would be greatly appreciated.
I've been a bundle of nerves lately.. I'm really excited to start my next step into the my weight loss journey, but at the same time I'm scared of the things that could go wrong.. having thoughts wondering if I'm making the right choice... Was wondering how everyone else dealt with the roller coaster of emotions leading up to the surgery..
When you go to reply to a blog, which so many of us do, it goes to a personal message for some reason. Am I doing something wrong? Or does this new format just suck all over?????
These are quotes on faith that really helped me -- I hope they help you too!
Faith is
1) Believing when I don't see it - visualizing the future in advance. (Picture that thin, sexy, fun you!)
2) Obeying when I don't understand it or think it doesn't make sense. (Trust the experts -- they know!)
3) Giving when I don't have it to give -- to stretch our faith. (Encourage others, focus on others, it helps!)
4) Persisting when I don't feel like it. (This is tough, but one day at a time, right?)
5) Thanking before I receive it. (Thank you for being here and encouraging me -- thank you God for giving me this tool to help me with this life-long struggle!)
All the best to my fellow travelers!
Deb
So today is my 7th day and I am 10 lbs. down! I am so happy I don't know what to do! I must admit I have had some hard times like Sat. My daughter had her 9th birthday party and wanted KFC so I had to make all these plates of chicken, mashed patatos and gravy and mac and cheese! That was super hard!!!! I just wanted a bite, but stayed strong and I am telling you that is saying alot for me! I have worked out 2 times and that is also something new! So I just wanted to share and yes it is hard when everyone around you is eating but for me, what make it easy is thinking about this oppertunity I have coming up and how happy I will be in the long run and being able to play with my 9year old and 3 year old for once! They need me I am a single parent and want to see them have babies and graduate and so on... OK that's all I am going to say for now..
Where to begin? i think by just plain admitting I like eating. I can't blame anyone or anything. I just plain like food. A LOT.! My body show just how much. The Michlene Tire Mascot is a mere shadow compared to me. I learned to sabatoge my lap band and will not give up any of my secrets here for obvious reasons. I have one grown son who sent me a heart wrenching e mail that both showed me how much he loved me and simutanously kicked me in the rear.(an easy target ) After his e mail woke my too comfortable self up, I did a self evaluation and I have a new desire for a healthy body. I worked out a plan with him and one of the first things we decided is that I need help and that I needed to join something for support. So here I am. HELP ME,! i have been a miserable failure all these years. Loosing a little , then gaining a lot. I do not want this to be another one of those times. I want this to be an absolute life changing success experience. I want to go to Disney Land with my Son's family. I am wheelchair bound because of my legs and a radical surgical procedure that did not go well about 15 years ago. That is not an excuse for my lack of success. I don't have an excuse. I have a reason, but not an excuse. Nothing can excuse my gluttony. I am asking for anyone who would be willing to read my blog (this is the first one i have ever done) and comment , suggest, encourage and just plain give me someone to account to. That would be Awesome. Please HELP ME. Also I am not very swift on computer tech verbage and still learning how to navigate this site. Hope this gets out there....Project Disney
wow !! I am not very good with the computer in the first place and now I am learning all over again. I havent posted in a while so I thought I would let every one that I am still here and still losing weight. It has slowed down some but that is my faught I am sure. After this last fill I think I was to tight. I couldnt eat much at all and I think my body was in starvation mode. I would get sick and the bite or two that I would get down would come back up. Then I had to learn how slow and how well chewed the food really needed to be. I am just now getting where I can eat a little more. I have lost 117 pds now. which is 16 pds in the last six weeks. So I cant complain. I am 8 months out tomorrow and I can honestly say that I am still learning. I no one thing I need to work on is getting more exercise. I am working on that one. I hope every one is still here and still doing well. God bless every one and I hope every one has a blessed Christmas. Thanks for reading.
Rhonda
I got the Lap band on August 19th 2009. The reason why I got it is because, On October 16th 2008 I was let go from my job, where I've been at for 9+yrs. I felt like I needed a life changing, change. I've been big all my life and I need and wanted something new. So, I decided to get the lap band. The first 4 months went good.... But as time went on my confidence got lower and lower. I couldn't find a job and I stopped caring.... As time went on not caring turned into something more, I was depressed for a long time. Couldn't sleep and feed started to be my friend again. I thought I was back on track in July. After a year and a half I found a job.... But that turned into bad news. My boss was a nasty person and she made it hard for me to do my job as well as she wanted me to. So after 90 days she let me go. It hurt but I wasn't going to let her win.
Now that Christmas has rolled its ugly head around, I'm faced with the fact that without a job, my kids won't have what they really want. So I left them no that this year is, hard on me and in time Christmas will be substituted for another day. See every day its hard to get back on track when my life just sucks right now. Its been a year and almost four months since my surgery. I went to the Dr. 2 months ago, and when I got on the scale I was disappointed. I failed..... And it made me not care when the Dr. just rolled his eyes at me. When I'm feeling disappointed and to see him roll his eyes at me. It made me feel like whats the use of trying. He doesn't no what I've been through in the past year and a half.
I'm trying to keep my head up...... Because I no the sun will shine bright on me. My one goal is to lose 100 pounds and I will do it....
Well, I am 7 days post op and was a little worried about waht was to come. Now i am motivated and excited again... it is so funny how support from people whom you don't know yet you share sooo much with can make you feel soo impowered.. I love this site and the ablity to speak with like minded individuals and to see/speak to thoses people who have come before me and accomplished thier goals..
My hubby was initally not supportaive of my decesion to hae lap band. He turned into a really really big Ahole.. But we eventually were able to talk it threw and now he tries soo hard it is cute. He dosen't really no what to say or do so he usually says.."maybe you should look on your lapband site.." It is so sily but you do have to stroke thier ego and let them know that you are not leaving. That you still love them ..lol...but it needs to be said..everyone has insecurites..
please ignore spelling and grammer errors. i like just being able to type as i think it..LOL...
will write again soon much love and success to all,
DD
I have been gone, busy with school work and the gym. When I went to the doctors previously I was 207.8, then after the infection episode, a little over a week. I was still at 207.8. My scale said 205.5 but I will follow the doctors. At the gym last week I was 208 ish with them and now I am 206.5, so that is progress. I am just annoyed I am not loosing inches. I am still waiting on my first fill which will be Thursday December 9, 2010, so wish me luck with that. I knew this would be a slow journey, I just didn't think I would be at such a snails pace. I think that first huge initial weight loss gets you all excited and then when you are starving for three weeks and trying to eat well and then can't exercise, it is annoying. Now that I am exercising hopefully the weight will come off even though I can not do the weights quite yet. I wanted to be down under 200 lbs by my Birthday and just not sure that is going to happen. My birthday is January 5, 2010. Only like four weeks away.
So here goes the beginning of my journey. While on the pre-op liquid I did cheat some but not much at all. I lost 11 pounds during the two weeks.
The day of surgery went pretty well. Checked in and then surgery went as scheduled started at 7:30 am and I was done by 8:30 even with a small hernia repair. I really don't remember much until about 11:00 when they moved me up to short stay. Getting out of the bed into the other bed was not fun. I had no idea what gas pain felt like and wow did it hurt. I have been through two child births and plastic surgery but this one topped them off. On a good note once I got over all the anesthesia I was able to get up and walk then life was much better. I was released from the hospital around 1:30 that afternoon and headed home.
Once I arrived home things were pretty good walked at wal-mart for awhile and felt really good after all the walking. Tired but no pain. Day one and two at home were pretty much the same figuring out how to move and turn in bed were a challenge.
Day three was Monday and back to work I went. I teach HS science so not a lot of physical labor just active kids. I was really tired by the end of the day and soreness was creeping up on me. I also recommend that you were really loose clothes on your abdomen or you will not be happy.
Day four was really tough getting out of bed I think work yesterday may have stressed me a little but I am back at work and we shall see how it goes.
I ate it straight from the jar last night AFTER having delicious soup and smoked port tenderloin for dinner. This was not necessary, I was not hungry, it was HABIT. AND a bad one. I admit to using food for everything, but thought/hoped I could last until my first fill without an emotional eating episode. Not so. DAMN!
Today starts a new day and another chance for correct expression of emotions and correct usage of food. Still up three pounds, and I honestly don't know if I can blame my pending period or my eating.
Any and all kicks in the butt are appreciated.
Live Wild,
Laura
I am getting my lap band tomorrow and it will not be filled. I wonder if I will be hungry these first 4 weeks before getting filled? I'm supposed to be on liquids only for 3 weeks.
So sometimes when I eat I get a horrible pain in the left side of my eck. It feels like the muscle on the left side is twisted or tight. It goes a way when I am not eating. It doesn't matter what I am eating. It sometimes happens when I drink too. Anyone else have this happen? I haven't contacted my Doc yet, thought I may get some answers here first. Thanks! Kandy
I GET BANDED IN 8 DAYS. I AM A HAVING A LOAD OF DIFFERENT EMOTIONS AT THE MOMENT. AS OF RIGHT NOW I AM EXCITED! I CAN NOT WAIT TO GET THIS SHOW ON THE ROAD! THIS MORNING I WOKE UP FEELING FRUSTRATED BECAUSE I WANT TO GET IT OVER WITH AND WHY DOES 24HRS FEEL LIKE 24 YRS! I AM APPREHENSIVE ABOUT THE FUTURE AND THE BUYING NEW CLOTHING ADVENTURE. BUT MOST OF ALL I AM SUPER ECITED FOR ME. I AM DOING THIS FOR ME, MYSELF AND I! I AM TAKING THE TIME I NEED TO MAKE MYSELF HAPPY, HEALTHY AND TO GIVE MYSELF A BETTER FUTURE. THINGS ARE LOOKING WAY UP FOR ME AND I AM REAPING THE REWARDS AS I TYPE THIS.
My name is Telisa Swan and this is my very first blog - ever. It actually took me a couple of days to figure out how to write on this page. I am not the most computer-oriented person on the planet.
I have joined this forum because, like everyone else, I have decided I would like to take control of my weight problem in a big way. The Vertical Gastric Sleeve seems like the best way to go for me. My daughter had a Gastric Bypass about 6 years ago and she is doing marvelously well. She weighed nearly 500 lbs. and now weighs a healthy 160. While the GB worked great for her, I feel the Sleeve will be better for me.
Currently I weight 311 lbs (down from 325), and have a BMI of 44.7. I have been heavy most of my life. I am a professional tattoo artist and I quite well known in my field. Still, I feel my weight problem has really held me back in my career. The tattoo industry can be quite "looks" oriented and all the talent in the world won't get you featured in the tattoo magazines if you are fat and unattractive. This prejudice is only a little less of a problem for men in my line of work. In reality, ANY person who is overweight in our culture has this kind of problem. You can be the best at what you do, have a charming personality and a sharp wit - but if they don't like how you look, they won't give you the time of day.
That said, it is not the only reason that I want to lose the weight (though it is the most painful issue on a daily basis). I really want to be able to live a longer, fuller life. As it is right now I can't do a lot of the things I want to do. I can't fit comfortable on an airplane or ride on a roller coaster, etc. I would love to do some hiking without running the risk of a heart attack (got a heart stint in 2003). I would just like to able to truly LIVE.
12 days post op, and I slipped with the food. Had a hot dog, (no bun) peanutbutter (not sure how much, as it was eaten right from the jar) and coolwhip (again, not sure how much) Why?
1. I was bored
2. I was procrastinating homework
3. I think I'm fixin to start my period, and I was craving FOOD
4. I have no restriction, but have been eating the bandster way and am starving.
I allowed myself a bit of time to feel like a complete and total loser, like this is just another diet that I'm failing...BUT...today is a new day. Time to get back on the bandwagon and move forward. What also sucks is the scale was up 4 lbs this morning, and i know I didn't consume 4 lbs worth of calories.
Ah well...it's a journed, and there will be slips.
Live wild
Laura
I am having a hard time with thinking that i mess up.i had surgery nov 10 and will have my first fill dec 13, two weeks after i saw my Dr. he told me that i could eat. i asked him how come i didnt feel like throwing and he told me it was because i wasn't filled yet. So the last two weeks i have eaten and drink my water not (sip) gulp !! so now i am freaking out because somethings i have read said that if you do that yuor stomach will strech right where your band is. so my mine is going crazy i think i messed everything up.
Here it is Sunday, December the 5th and I still can't believe what's happened in the past week. Chris from Dr. Lalor's office called me on Thursday, December 2nd to let me know that she resubmitted my paperwork to Anthem BC/BS on Wednesday, December 1st.
She had gotten an email from Anthem stating that they now cover the sleeve as a "stand alone" surgery!
My paperwork was submitted July 29th, and I had gotten a denial letter in September due to the sleeve being considered experimental/investigational. I have been waiting for the surgeon to send an appeal letter for me since that point. I'm just in shock! I called Chris back on Friday the 3rd to ask her when she was scheduling surgeries. She told me that she just started scheduling for February 2011 and that she expects to hear back from Anthem within 2 weeks. That means I should be having my surgery in February if all goes well !!!
I expect to have to redo my bloodwork and chest xray, but I hope that's all. What a great Christmas present!!
Well I have to admit that I have not always followed my preop diet to perfection. Through Kaiser they want you eating a certain way and well I would on a few occasions have a cheat day or rather a cheat meal. Just this past Friday, 9 days before my surgery, I drank two margaritas and had a veggie burrito. I felt really guilty about the alcohol. I guess it was sort of my last meal. I just now worry that my liver is going to be all gigiantic and slippery during surgery. I think that I am just getting really nervous about the surgery in general. I will be sticking to low carbs and high protein until my surgery which will mean that I will be doing that consistently for 8 days. I have lost a little over 30 pounds during this preop period. I just hope that I will be okay and that my liver will not cause any difficulties during surgery.
I can't stop thinking about this surgery. It is so crazy that I am doing this to myself. I know that it is just nerves and that almost everyone goes through these feelings before surgery. I just wish that I wasn't so freaked out. I am sure that I will have a mini panic attack when I get into the operating room. Then being in the hospital overnight by myself. I guess I just need to stop thinking about these things and try to think about 2 months from now when I have lost weight and can eat and drink easier and not be in any pain. During my preop class last week the case manager gave us relaxations CDs...maybe I need to go and listen to it!
I'm literally almost crying reading this. Mostly because I'mon this pre-op diet and these last two days have been difficult... but also because I needed this! Thank you! Congrats! And a BIG congrats on quitting smoking a second time! It was hard enough to do it once... So - when I say BIG congrats... I mean BIIIIIG congrats! ❤️
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