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I dont know what to do!!!!!!!!!!!



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Hi I just wanted to add something else that might really help you. An Overeaters Anonymous group. The reason is that you receive lots and lots of fabulous support from everyone else who is going through the same thing, plus you learn so much from working the 12 steps.

I am in AA, so I have been able to translate the things that I have learned in AA towards my eating. It's miraculous what happens in a 12 step group....I have learned my best coping skills there.

One big thing I have learned about is that stuffing my feelings is not healthy for me and that feelings are not going to kill me. I spent my life stuffing feelings with pills, cigarettes and alcohol and finally food, because I had a big load of pain I was carrying around. OA will teach you how to get through the feelings and the pain and get through to the other side. Soon you will find yourself thinking and feeling and acting differently, and that you have a load of friends to help you through.

This is the very best advice I could ever give to anyone.

My mottos these days are :

Break on through to the other side

The only way out is through.

Hope this helps you.

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Thanks to you all! I'm so inspired after reading this post!

I have been eating too much at night too! And- not drinking enough H20- and exercise weel, I've been promising to step it up past walking and I joined the gym on Tuesday- well I promised myself 4x week at the gym and I haven't gone yet.....

Well- forget that, I'm going now! Work out and Water.....

my new mantra

I won't fail myself or my band!!!!!

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Just a suggestion, get your band checked out. Of course you have lost 48 pounds since february and that is pretty awsome.

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Nykee,

I have just sent you a PM inviting you to become friends with me. I really would like to get to know you better as I think you have a powerful heart and are a really good person. Something we have in common. I am sending this in the event you do not read your PM, but please feel free to contact me, my email address is cspiller@earthlink.net and you can email me at any time, and I promise I will respond.

Cindy:)

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:) ERIN R

thankyou for the invaluable information.

This is something I will try.

It is very uncomfortable to eat at around 3 pm (lunch, and when my kids get home)(I am disabled) BUT in the last few days beccause Of some other advice, I have been puching my band in some ohter ways and I think this will work. I am gonna try eating the most at that time so I wont evren want to eat so much at night, evven if its too much.. as long as I am not eating at night.. so we can see if maybe I can go back to at leaste somethgin hot in the morning. THANK YOU

see. alexandrea gave me sopme advice.. and what I did with her advice was (LOLOLOL) order KFC (the kids were very happy)... ya know, I told her I was gonna chew some of the chicken and spit it out (I know it would of been better to bake it and all that cuz KFC is fat and carbs and crap.. but I was just experimenting at this point.

What I found out was that I could take two bites of eat kind (bbQ and crispy) and chew and spit and I KNOW some of it went down, way more than I thought I could handle.. THEN< I took three bites of biscuit and chewed real well and spit but I KNOW some of it went down,..

THEN I took a couple bites of coleslaw (I was so full and saticfied at this point) .. I spit it out, cut I know a few of the square bits stayeed

my point is.............I was affraid... It didnt hurt alot, I didnt PB, or gag or slime or nothing.. nothing happened at all..

In all honesy.. I am not happy wiht this knowledge.. BUT.. I havent tried it since.. (ANY BIG MEAL LIKE THAT)

wHAT i DO DO NOW IS EAT my Soup without spitting out all the little peices of chicken and corn and rice and such. AND ITS BEEN FINE.

Somewhere in here, someone said I was affraid and it was true.

Still doesnt solve my problem I think I have where I cant diet and my band has to do all the work, it in fact made it worse.. MAYBE

cuz the fact is, I am not looseing weight..

So.. I have to do it differerently.. what wver that differently is.

thanks for all the advice and support.

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Just a suggestion, get your band checked out. Of course you have lost 48 pounds since february and that is pretty awsome.

..............

I lost the weight before I went.. on my own.. and in less than a month and a half..(ja.1 to feb. 15) i LOST 41 POUNDS

lol

i am gonna weight my self this week..

wonder what it will be

Las t I knew it was 364

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Nykee,

Please read:

YOUR BAND IS TOO TIGHT! YOUR BAND IS TOO TIGHT! YOUR BAND IS TOO TIGHT!

You need to get some of your saline removed. You will not succeed if you do not eat solid Protein. The band is designed to create satiety when the upper pouch is filled with solid Protein and this gives you the illusion you are full with smaller quantities. Take this information from someone who has been banded for 2 years and 3 months and lost 90% of my excess weight so far. ME!!

Babs in TX

334/18-/170

-154

As another bandster with quite a bit of experience and success, I second that. YOU ARE TOO TIGHT. You need to get some saline removed and learn to eat normally. Your body is becoming malnourished (even though you are not losing weight) because you aren't getting Vitamins, etc.

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Hi Nykee -

All the advice given here is right on. I second the following points:

1. You are TOO tight.

2. You must be loose enough to eat REAL food - Proteins and veggies.

3. Bigger meals in the afternoon to help cut cravings at night.

4. Hot liquids in the morning to help loosen you.

5. More Water.

Can I reiterate - YOU ARE TOO TIGHT.

But, to help even out your restriction.

1. You are consuming waaaay too much sodium and not enough Water. Of course you are going to have edema first thing in the mornings, which will make your band feel even tighter. Soups and cheetos are full of salt. Cheetos chew down to mush, and Soup is a liquid (particularly if you're spitting out the meat and veggies), and does not help you stay satisfied. If you choose to eat this way, then you MUST make up for all that sodium by drinking tons of water to help your kidneys flush out that salt. Otherwise you will swell up like a balloon and your band will be too tight.

2. Do you have any kind of allergies or post nasal drip? Do you wake up congested in the mornings? That will make you tight as well. You need to keep your mucus as thin as possible, which of course is best done by staying hydrated. If you have some sort of allergies or tend to wake up congested perhaps you should try a decongestant before going to bed. Mucus draining into your pouch all night will also make you feel tight in the mornings.

Here is an interesting article on edema, causes, and possible solutions:

http://www.diagnose-me.com/cond/C576850.html

I found these points interesting:

"Low Protein levels in the blood that can be seen in malnutrition, kidney and liver disease. The proteins in the blood help hold salt and water inside the blood vessels so Fluid does not leak out into the tissues. If albumin (the most abundant blood protein) gets too low, edema occurs especially in the feet, ankles and lower legs."

"It may take from 2 to 6 weeks following long term dehydration for your body to get used to being normally hydrated again and flush out the extra Fluid it has been retaining."

"Semi-starvation can cause edema. People with eating disorders may interpret the puffiness of edema or any changes on the scale as weight gain or getting "fat" and may panic and purge or take laxatives even more."

You need some Protein, less salt, and lots more water, IMHO. You also need a slight unfill. IMHO.

Wishing you all the best -

xxoo

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thanks again! The salt thing makes perfrect sense

these are things that can really help

I am not getting an unfill (though I understand why you all say so)

I am not starving AT ALL

today I tried to eat at 3-5 pm... instead of 9pm to midnight and it SUCKED.

BUT, I did it.. and NOW.. I will drink one cup of ice Water before I go to bed (I HATE Water and its all I can do for now.. I WILL do it)

The reason is sucked was... at around 5pm all I had had up till them was some juice.. and then I tried some soup..its got chicken in it and corn (its the signiture Soup from safeway called chicken fajita)

so 3pm.. the soup hurt but I got about 1/2 cup and one chunk of chicken

4:30.. I got another cup or so and two chunks of chicken (I still spit some out)

I dont like eating at this time.. I dont like the way it feels... but i am trying.

at about 7pm...we had mcdonalds and I had like three chicken nuggets with all the bread torn off and it hurt and I could feel it in my throat and I got really pissed off at the whole experience.

then I tried to have a peach smoothis (low sugar) but couldnt really swallow but a few sips cuz of the chicken..

And here I am tonight..NOT EATING!

I have cheetos in the cuppord and milk and I am sure I could pig out on some things..(I did have one cookie and three rolo's candies) but I just wanna see if eating earlier in the day works (even if it hurts)

I left the house today for the first time in a long while..

I think I did lose weight, but I dont want to get my hopes up.

IF.. I have lost weight.. I will give this up for now.. and go back to trying hard to eat right.

I go grocery shopping on friday..

I only have 254$ for me and a 13 and 14 yr old girls and a 17 yr old and an 18 yr old who come over all the time (as they NEED to)

They respect my need for food and such, but its hard.. I mean I been buying them peanutbutter and jelly and corndogs (ON PURPOSE) cuz its cheap and I wont be getting into that food.. but I used to do a decent job keeping them healthier (no ones fat)

anyway.

thanks again.

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You will never get through this. It won't happen. You will erode your band or experience some other type of difficult medical issue because you are so stubborn, you don't listen to wisdom, you are being very very foolish.

You need an unfill.

I hate to sit back and watch this but until you get a small unfill you will not succeed. Give all the excuses you want but until you get an unfill...just a small one! you are a ticking time bomb, waiting for it all to fall apart, ready to blame everyone but your own self for refusing wisdom.

That's all the advice and encouragement you will get from me. Pick it apart if you like. Quote me and tell me where I'm off-base. Whatever. The writing is on the wall. You know it is. I wish there were something I could say to help, but you aren't listening. I will say it in agreement with the others...

You need an ufill You need an unfill You need an unfill

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The reason is sucked was... at around 5pm all I had had up till them was some juice.. and then I tried some soup..its got chicken in it and corn (its the signiture Soup from safeway called chicken fajita)

so 3pm.. the soup hurt but I got about 1/2 cup and one chunk of chicken

4:30.. I got another cup or so and two chunks of chicken (I still spit some out)

I dont like eating at this time.. I dont like the way it feels... but i am trying.

at about 7pm...we had mcdonalds and I had like three chicken nuggets with all the bread torn off and it hurt and I could feel it in my throat and I got really pissed off at the whole experience.

then I tried to have a peach smoothis (low sugar) but couldnt really swallow but a few sips cuz of the chicken..

And here I am tonight..NOT EATING!

I have cheetos in the cuppord and milk and I am sure I could pig out on some things..(I did have one cookie and three rolo's candies) but I just wanna see if eating earlier in the day works (even if it hurts)

Nykee, can you not see that YOU are doing this to yourself by insisting on being too tight? You will do ANYTHING to succeed except be reasonable about the process and make it possible for yourself to be a success. You are NOT supposed to "never be hungry" - you are SUPPOSED to get hungry, eat a reasonable amount of healthy food WITHOUT PAIN OR FEAR, feel satisfied and stop eating. Until you get hungry again.

Eating at 3PM would not suck if you were not TOO TIGHT. You would not need to subsist on Soups, juice and milk if you were not TOO TIGHT. I don't care if you don't mind or not - that isn't the point.

YOU are insisting on doing this the hard way. You are NOT getting the results you want because of it.

Have you ever heard the saying, "Keep doing what you've always done, and you will keep getting what you've always gotten."? YOU are sabotaging yourself, and pretending that you are not.

WE DO NOT HAVE TO DO DRASTIC THINGS TO GET RESULTS. Drastic measures are rarely effective in the long term, because they simply are not maintainable.

And in case you didn't hear it earlier, YOU ARE SABOTAGING YOURSELF.

Get a slight unfill and allow yourself to succeed. But unfill or not, NO ONE can lose weight subsisting on nothing but juice, milk, cheetos, Cookies, and the broth from various soups. You will NEVER be tight enough to be successful with those food choices comprising 95-99% of your menu.

I am not condemning your choices - I'm just telling you the reality.

I wish I could wave a magic wand and heal your hurts - your life has been a living hell, and I am in awe of how you keep going. Don't keep making your life hard because that's what you're used to. Please?

xxoo

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Nykee - nobody can help you if you won't help yourself. In this instance - helping yourself means getting an unfill.

NOT THE WHOLE THING - Just take out a .5cc or so.

Everytime it "hurts" when you eat - you are causing swelling in your esophogus - which causes more pain when you eat - which causes more swelling in your esophogus - which causes more pain when you eat... GET AN UNFILL.

Until you do, you are flirting with disaster and sabotaging yourself. Part of loving yourself is admitting when you are wrong AND CHANGING YOUR ACTIONS.

Please Nykee - Please listen to the words of wisdom provided by your "Band Elders".

They have all been there and done that - they are not trying to cause you distress or sabotage your efforts - THEY ARE TRYING TO HELP YOU. Please listen.

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Nykee,

I went for a fill yesterday and the fill doctor told me to lay off of Soup. It goes straight through your band and you will never feel restricted. I have been overfilled. YOU ARE OVERFILLED!! Just go get a little taken out. Yesterday they put in .4cc and I couldn't get down Water so they took our .2ccs and I feel great. I to am very restricted in the mornings and they told me from now on to get my fills in the afternoon. Drink something hot and it will open you up. Take small sips though. Call your doctor and ask for a slight unfill. You need to eat solid food. I was told it is the only way that the band will work! Please take all the advice and call your doctor. I know you had a horrible fill experince and believe me when you get that slight unfill it will make a huge difference!

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