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Lucky #7 are still going strong !!!



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Called the mortgage company and ended up getting emotional. They said I have no options, I don't qualify for anything. When the said they'd talk to the boss and if they could call me at my old phone #, I lost it and said, No you can't call me at my old phone # because I had to cancel my land line because I couldn't afford it and then hung up. Talked to a realtor about selling the house. They are going to do a cma, basically check if my house will sell for what I owe and enough to pay the realtor fees and possibly enough to put a down payment on a smaller house with less property. The problem is that my house is considered a small house, so I will have to rent. There is no houses available to rent in our community to I will have to move into Missoula a 20 mile drive one way. If I have to rent, I will not be able to take my dogs, so will have to find someone to give them too. That's life. Should do great things for the weight loss, I'm too stressed to eat. I have been checking out job options. Only one of my kids could help me and they know I can't make my payment and they aren't offering, and I won't ask. DD#4 & DD#5 are in college and barely pay their own bills. DD#3 just started a new job and is only making a small salary. DD#1, the lawyer, got fired from her job and had to take a job that pays $20,000 less than what she was making. So that leaves DD#2, she helped me out last month, but made it pretty clear that she won't help me again. I looked into bankruptcy and I would loose my house. So the best option is to try to sell it and hope I can find a place to rent. My house was my retirement plan. I was hoping to have enough equity when I finally retired that I could have enough to live off.

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Just sent up a prayer for Tracy. She'll do fine... and she'll feel so much better without those malfunctioning organs.. in two weeks she'll feel like her old self, but will continure to have to take it easy (no lifting) for a full 6 weeks.

Why didn't they do a spinal on her instead of general anesthetic??? SHe would have felt more in control of the situation and no I.V. just a needle in the back and some heavy valium.... that's how I had mine done.. I was sitting up on the gerny coming out of the o.r. Yaking to everyone( cause I was still loopy from the Valium)

They will manage her pain... be strong MOM..Love C

Phyl

I have been saying prayers since yesterday - since I saw your post on F. Let us know how's she doing..Hugs - she will be fine :0)

Okie dokie... here's the scoop. Surgery went fine... everything as expected. She did have to have open as fibroids were too big for lap/vag procedure. Ovaries were clear so they left them intact--was glad to hear that. Tissue to pathology but no surprises expected...doc said appeard to be just benign fibroids. General anesthesia was her choice.. she wanted to be OUT. Wish I'd started talking to her about that sooner. I had spinal with light anesthesai and they probably could have done the same for her. She would have been out.. but no necessity for intubation that way. At any rate, JIm called me when she was in recovery. Then she called me about an hour and a half ago... loopy, but in her room and awake enough to talk to me... and she posted on FB shortly after that thanking everyone for their prayers. Thanks for your prayers and all your kind expressions.

still wish I was there... not sure how good of a nurse JIm will be! LOL

Janet... glad to hear things are looking up with your sister. That is GREAT news! Hope all goes well with all the proceedings coming up.

Karla... I don't know what to say. Situation seems hopeless, but don't give up.

BTW.... stationary bike for 20 minutes yesterday varying degrees of resistance...

bikes in exercise room are programmable. I just haven't yet found a routine that works well for me. Yesterday was tough and today... my butt muscles are killing me!

Did about 15 minutes this morning using a slightly different routine. I think I may skip tomorrow! Okay to skip a day!?!

Edited by phyllser

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Phyl, you aren't skipping a day, you are allowing muscles to heal!!! Glad everything went well for Tracy. Make sure she follows the No Lifting for 6 weeks. Also, talk to her about starting some pelvic floor exercises to strengthen everything so she doesn't have an issue with pelvic organ prolapse. Have her talke to the doc. Once the uterious is gone the center of gravity/pressure drops down and she will be more prone for prolapse. I'm so glad things went well. Tell her to take her time to heal. Can't stress that enough. Also just because the doc says she can start lifting remind her to listen to her body. It takes a full year to totally heal. Part of my problems are that I rushed the lifting.

Also, thanks for the kind words. The hardest part of selling will be giving up the puppies and having to commute. We won't even talk about having to be on Realtor Alert, making sure everything is spotless 24/7. I'll need to sell a lot of my quilting stuff and furniture, because I won't be able to afford to put it in storage. That will be a heart breaker also. If I could have had a 24 month reduction of payment, I could have kept my house. I don't like moving to the 'city', I never have lived in one and it is scary to have to worry about intruders. I haven't told the kids that the dogs will have to go. They are under the illusion that we will be able to find a place to rent that will allow us to have 3 dogs and a cat. I'd rather have my arm ripped off than hurt them, or give up my babies. Dang I'm going to have to give away my koi, didn't think of that. I've raised them from 3 inch babies to almost a foot long. I'll give them to a fellow pond person.

Reality sure does hurt.

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Phyl, you aren't skipping a day, you are allowing muscles to heal!!! Glad everything went well for Tracy. Make sure she follows the No Lifting for 6 weeks. Also, talk to her about starting some pelvic floor exercises to strengthen everything so she doesn't have an issue with pelvic organ prolapse. Have her talke to the doc. Once the uterious is gone the center of gravity/pressure drops down and she will be more prone for prolapse. I'm so glad things went well. Tell her to take her time to heal. Can't stress that enough. Also just because the doc says she can start lifting remind her to listen to her body. It takes a full year to totally heal. Part of my problems are that I rushed the lifting.

Also, thanks for the kind words. The hardest part of selling will be giving up the puppies and having to commute. We won't even talk about having to be on Realtor Alert, making sure everything is spotless 24/7. I'll need to sell a lot of my quilting stuff and furniture, because I won't be able to afford to put it in storage. That will be a heart breaker also. If I could have had a 24 month reduction of payment, I could have kept my house. I don't like moving to the 'city', I never have lived in one and it is scary to have to worry about intruders. I haven't told the kids that the dogs will have to go. They are under the illusion that we will be able to find a place to rent that will allow us to have 3 dogs and a cat. I'd rather have my arm ripped off than hurt them, or give up my babies. Dang I'm going to have to give away my koi, didn't think of that. I've raised them from 3 inch babies to almost a foot long. I'll give them to a fellow pond person.

Reality sure does hurt.

Karla; you don't need to think that far ahead... you just never know someone might rent to you with the dogs... don't count them out yet. 20 mile commute is not that bad, you can use the road time to DeSTRESS at the end of the day, you know wind down before you get home... sometimes there's lots of good 'reflection time' in the car... look to the positives...

YOU DID HAVE the COURAGE to call the mortgage company, give yoursself credit for that... it was a big step, and you did it.:thumbup:

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Okie dokie... here's the scoop. Surgery went fine... everything as expected. She did have to have open as fibroids were too big for lap/vag procedure. Ovaries were clear so they left them intact--was glad to hear that. Tissue to pathology but no surprises expected...doc said appeard to be just benign fibroids. General anesthesia was her choice.. she wanted to be OUT. Wish I'd started talking to her about that sooner. I had spinal with light anesthesai and they probably could have done the same for her. She would have been out.. but no necessity for intubation that way. At any rate, JIm called me when she was in recovery. Then she called me about an hour and a half ago... loopy, but in her room and awake enough to talk to me... and she posted on FB shortly after that thanking everyone for their prayers. Thanks for your prayers and all your kind expressions.

still wish I was there... not sure how good of a nurse JIm will be! LOL

Oh that is good news indeed!!! Say hello to her for all of us when you talk next to Tracy....

I know that must have been rough for you, being down south when your baby was up north... I would be a worry wart too.

Janet... glad to hear things are looking up with your sister. That is GREAT news! Hope all goes well with all the proceedings coming up.

Karla... I don't know what to say. Situation seems hopeless, but don't give up.

BTW.... stationary bike for 20 minutes yesterday varying degrees of resistance...

bikes in exercise room are programmable. I just haven't yet found a routine that works well for me. Yesterday was tough and today... my butt muscles are killing me!

Did about 15 minutes this morning using a slightly different routine. I think I may skip tomorrow! Okay to skip a day!?!

Ya, go skip a day... you've worked hard.

I went for another 60 min walk-a-thon with my new WALKING BUDDY... I almost said, ah no, its late, its dark, its rainy outside.. but then I said YES... so glad I did, it feels so good once you are dressed for it and outside... but know I am really hungry = I think I'll have 2 packets of popcorn tonight :cursing:

Night all, TUDORS is on tonight at 9 pm and I just CANT miss it!!! :thumbup:

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Phyl

Be sure to give Tracy our love - glad to hear all went well.. Ya I bet it's hard not being there.

Yes it's allowable to skip a day like Karla said you have to give your muscles time to heal - but sore is good - you are building muscles - give it time you will find a program you like - I don't use a program = I do manuel quick start and just increase the speed and incline mannually - you should be able to do that on the bike - well you control the speed but you can increase the resitance for a few minute then go back to flat then increase again - back and forth - thats what I do.

Candice - Good for you on your walk - who's your new walking buddy??

Yes - I love my Sister - I don't like that we have this between us - She hurt my feelings talking crap about me and my dad.. But this too shall pass - I knew it would eventually - since I talked to my Uncle a couple of weeks ago - it hasn't been on my brain 24/7.

I will still be on guard with her and I don't like that - but eventually I guess that will go away too..

Karla

Hugs - When did you buy your house - what changed $$$ wise since you purchased it. The way the news talks the banks don't want to have their properties forclosed on - let the stupid person talk to their boss - call them back tomorrow

You may find a place to rent w/your animals they have them - just require a bigger deposit and you have small dogs - don't even mention the cat and say you have just 1 dog not 3.

I know this has to be the worse thing for you right now and I wish there was something I could say to make things better - since I don't know what to say

Can you refinance are you upside down on your house (what you paid for it and what it's worth now) Do you have a fixed or variable interest?

Call back the mtg pple - you hear on the news all the time that they are working with pple

I hate this laptop the whole finger mouse - i gotta go find the mouse for it..

If you quit paying for you DD health insurance would you be able to afford the house payment. In cali we have healthy families (medical/government insurance) yes they do here's the link

Department of Public Health & Human Services - Montana Medicaid

looks like up to age 19 - it's worth a try - cuz if I remember right that is costing you a lot of money - since she's 18 your income shouldn't matter..

Dont give up yet - you are moving in the right direction -

Wish I could do more than offer a shoulder :

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Janet, what changed money wise is no longer getting $1000 a month childsupport and having 2 kids in college, insurance going up, house taxes going up, buying healthy food, medical insurance going up. I've had my house for 5 years, DD#4 is 23 and DD#5 is 19, so the medicare doesn't work. I am going to check on modifying my insurance tomorrow to see if I can drop my dental and or dropping the girls. Check into a major medical program. I thought I planned for not having childsupport. I shouldn't have gotten the band, I took out a loan and pay $200 a month. I had it all budgeted out, I knew it would be tight, but possible. But because everything is costing more I'm not making it. I have hesitated talking to the bank that has my loan because they were so great about giving me the loan, plus if I default on the loan, I loose my car. So we will see what tomorrow will bring. Maybe I will win the $1000 scratch holiday cash card at my grocery store, that would buy me 5 months.

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Janet, what changed money wise is no longer getting $1000 a month childsupport and having 2 kids in college, insurance going up, house taxes going up, buying healthy food, medical insurance going up. I've had my house for 5 years, DD#4 is 23 and DD#5 is 19, so the medicare doesn't work. I am going to check on modifying my insurance tomorrow to see if I can drop my dental and or dropping the girls. Check into a major medical program. I thought I planned for not having childsupport. I shouldn't have gotten the band, I took out a loan and pay $200 a month. I had it all budgeted out, I knew it would be tight, but possible. But because everything is costing more I'm not making it. I have hesitated talking to the bank that has my loan because they were so great about giving me the loan, plus if I default on the loan, I loose my car. So we will see what tomorrow will bring. Maybe I will win the $1000 scratch holiday cash card at my grocery store, that would buy me 5 months.

Ok I forgot about that childsupport issue - now I remember - They (dd's) should still qualify for some kind of medicade..

Isn't that what debit counslers do is take all those payments (band - past medical etc) and consolidate them so that you can make all the payments.

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Okay ladies. This is a fly by. I finally got caught up on the reading and I have a ton to say, but it was enough to read it all. i will try to pop in tomorrow.

Phyl, you look so beautiful! I can't imagine the transformation you have undergone. You glow! Love you!

Candice, computer problems suck. Glad you got them fixed.

Janet, have I told you lately how special I think you are. You are such an inspiration and always care about each and every one of us. Thank you for being you!

Karla, you know where you can store ANYTHING! I'm pretty sure there is space for everything you own in mom's basement now. So don't you dare think about selling your quilting stuff. Just stop it right there! As for the other issues, I wish I had something to offer. Just know I'm thinking of you. NE Montana always needs teachers and lots of these itty bitty districts have teacherages. Outlook I had a 4 bedroom 2 story, for $50 plus utilities. I know it's a long time down the road, but it's a thought. Keep an eye on the OPI site.

Okay....me....went to see Michael. It was hard. Had family therapy. Michael blew up and walked out, Jeff and I talked about some ghosts in my closet....then it was over. We talked all the way home which was very nice. We came to some conclusions. It was a hard couple of days.

okay...other things but going to put those off until later. I have to leave for my therapy tomorrow morning at 630 so I'm going to call it a night early. sleep well ladies. Love you all.

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oops forgot. Who wasn't sleeping? ??

utube guided imagery and look for one that is very very soothing for you. It worked wonders for me more than anything, even sleeping pills. The effects have lasted for days!!!!

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Steph, are you and Jeff okay? You have me worried? I'm here.

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We are alright darling. Now that Michael isn't here for me to focus on and really take my energy, my marriage is more in the limelight. We'll be good.

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Steph, I'm glad. You and Jeff give me hope that love does exist and can weather storms. Just remember why you got married. (Yeah right, like I should give advice.)

Ignored Miss Molly at 4 am and now I pay the price. So tonight I'll be cleaning. I was just so tired. The extra half out sleep was definitely NOT worth the mess.

I'm so glad it is Thursday...only 2 more days and then I can sleep for a while. I need to figure out my physics plan by Sunday, but I'll figure that out on Saturday, not worrying about it.

Next Sunday DD#3,4,&5 are driving to Spokane to see the broadway production of The Lion King. They bought their tickets this summer. They have an extra ticket and want me to go, but I just can't face it or afford it, so hopefully they can sell their ticket. I just want to sleep. I'd be ill if it wan't so much to get ready for a sub.

hope you all have a good day.

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Phyl

Be sure to give Tracy our love - glad to hear all went well.. Ya I bet it's hard not being there.

Yes it's allowable to skip a day like Karla said you have to give your muscles time to heal - but sore is good - you are building muscles - give it time you will find a program you like - I don't use a program = I do manuel quick start and just increase the speed and incline mannually - you should be able to do that on the bike - well you control the speed but you can increase the resitance for a few minute then go back to flat then increase again - back and forth - thats what I do.

Candice - Good for you on your walk - who's your new walking buddy??

my new walking buddy is MIchelle, she and I used to work at the same clinic and she is just around the block. She also has a dog SULLY who needs sociallizing so my TWIG and I start walking towards Michelles and then she starts walking towards me and then we plow out together for an hour or an hour/1/2.... Last night she says "Oh wouldn't it be cool to enter a marathon?" :thumbup: I said wtf I am 54 years old, you are 26!!!!! No, walking is more my speed, but I would do a 5k or a 10 k walk-a-thon... that I could work up to like Stephanie did... She is so much younger than I but we have a connection. Both addicts... me food, and her well "other stuf" she is in school taking her masters in Addiction Counseling... really a smart cookie & I am so proud of her.. Almost like a second daughter...

Yes - I love my Sister - I don't like that we have this between us - She hurt my feelings talking crap about me and my dad.. But this too shall pass - I knew it would eventually - since I talked to my Uncle a couple of weeks ago - it hasn't been on my brain 24/7.

I will still be on guard with her and I don't like that - but eventually I guess that will go away too..

jANET, THAT IS normal to be on quard for a while,you have to protect your heart, its been trompt on before...

Karla

Hugs - When did you buy your house - what changed $$$ wise since you purchased it. The way the news talks the banks don't want to have their properties forclosed on - let the stupid person talk to their boss - call them back tomorrow

You may find a place to rent w/your animals they have them - just require a bigger deposit and you have small dogs - don't even mention the cat and say you have just 1 dog not 3.

I know this has to be the worse thing for you right now and I wish there was something I could say to make things better - since I don't know what to say

Can you refinance are you upside down on your house (what you paid for it and what it's worth now) Do you have a fixed or variable interest?

Call back the mtg pple - you hear on the news all the time that they are working with pple

I hate this laptop the whole finger mouse - i gotta go find the mouse for it..

If you quit paying for you DD health insurance would you be able to afford the house payment. In cali we have healthy families (medical/government insurance) yes they do here's the link

Department of Public Health & Human Services - Montana Medicaid

looks like up to age 19 - it's worth a try - cuz if I remember right that is costing you a lot of money - since she's 18 your income shouldn't matter..

Dont give up yet - you are moving in the right direction -

Wish I could do more than offer a shoulder :

Slept like a log last night...

Karla, have you thougjt of putting the 4 a.m/ dog in a crate for the night??? That would keep mine from messing.

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Okay ladies. This is a fly by. I finally got caught up on the reading and I have a ton to say, but it was enough to read it all. i will try to pop in tomorrow.

Phyl, you look so beautiful! I can't imagine the transformation you have undergone. You glow! Love you!

Candice, computer problems suck. Glad you got them fixed.

Janet, have I told you lately how special I think you are. You are such an inspiration and always care about each and every one of us. Thank you for being you!

Karla, you know where you can store ANYTHING! I'm pretty sure there is space for everything you own in mom's basement now. So don't you dare think about selling your quilting stuff. Just stop it right there! As for the other issues, I wish I had something to offer. Just know I'm thinking of you. NE Montana always needs teachers and lots of these itty bitty districts have teacherages. Outlook I had a 4 bedroom 2 story, for $50 plus utilities. I know it's a long time down the road, but it's a thought. Keep an eye on the OPI site.

Okay....me....went to see Michael. It was hard. Had family therapy. Michael blew up and walked out, Jeff and I talked about some ghosts in my closet....then it was over. We talked all the way home which was very nice. We came to some conclusions. It was a hard couple of days.

okay...other things but going to put those off until later. I have to leave for my therapy tomorrow morning at 630 so I'm going to call it a night early. sleep well ladies. Love you all.

Good for you having a productive session, you and Jeff sound like you are able to make the best of this situation. Michael will come around, he's just exercising the only control of the therapy.. If he can't think of any productive, he gets scared of the truth and bails out.

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    • Doughgurl

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    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      1. LeighaTR

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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