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Anyone else indecisive?



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When I first started thinking about it, I was not sure I wanted to take the "easy" way out. I went to a psychologist and talked about it for a few months and she really helped me make up my mind that I have done everything I can on my own and this is just my next step. And, as they say, it is not easy, it is just a different tool than I have ever had before. I should hear from the insurance company this week. Good luck in making up your mind. Whatever you decide will be the right thing for YOU.

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I am indecisive, not only about whether or not to have surgery, but also about what type to have. At first I wanted bypass, then I got scared about dumping syndrome and having to be careful of malnutrition. Then I was all gung-ho for banding, now I'm scared at what I've been reading about long term complications (one website mentioned 60% of people with bands opt to have them removed after 5 or 6 years because of complications??? If that were accurate wouldn't the FDA or whomever have pulled it by now? If it's even close to accurate 60% is really bad!) There are clips on youtube of interviews with band patients that are having their surgeries revised because of sudden difficulties keeping anything down, even after years of trouble-free success. So I don't know what to think anymore or what information out there can be believed. My own primary doctor, when I brought up my interest in surgery, said that there's a high failure rate, but I don't know if she was referring to banding or weight loss surgery in general. I also don't know if she was referring to that failure rate being due to mechanical issues or because of patients doing all the wrong things.

I still intend to go through my 6-month supervised diet, which will give me 6 months to keep thinking about it, but at this time I have no idea what I'm going to do. I'm very torn and confused.

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frauhowe, your post was really interesting to me. I realized something. At 53 (last year) my primary told me "Jeff, it's all about to go to hell for you. You've been "borderline" on lots of things for a while now, but unless you do something drastic, in 3 months you're going to be on diabetes and cholesterol medication. You are going downhill and as you age there is not a damn thing I can do about it, unless you lose some weight." Rather than depress me, it helped me decide that I wanted the lap band even if I paid for it out of pocket. That was the final straw for me.

In 5-6 years, at 60, if I am thinner and still not a diabetic and still without heart trouble, then I will gladly have a revision surgery if I need it. I will probably be healthy enough to weather it, since I am losing with my band. I would never have initially had the courage to do a sleeve or bypass. Now, I am not so afraid. But for some of us, we have to have training wheels. I got the band thinking it was for life. I realize now that if it isn't, I can handle it. But what I couldn't handle was any more time at 405.

For people who aren't on that ledge, as I was, the decision can be hard. I was always the "healthy" fat person, and it does catch up with you.

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I had been thinking about WLS for 5+ years before I finally got it done. The final straw for was after being diagnosed with PCOS, and metabolic syndrom, I lost 50lbs. Then after going through a depression because I could not pregnant after trying for 3+ years I gained half of it back. Then when I snapped out of my depression I tried getting back on track of eating healthy and trying to loose weight. I would do ok for a few days sometimes even weeks then back to my old habits. I told myself, last summer that WLS was my last option. I was terrified of surgery, and really wasn't ready for it. I didn't want to give up fast food, and buffets, and margaritas, so I was detrimined to do it on my own, and thought that the idea of surgery would get me back on track. I ended up going up and down in my weight, and then slowly just gained 20 more lbs back, which brought me back up to 275 lbs, and my health was just getting worse. I went to a seminar and decided it was time to get the surgery. I was tired of being overweight. Tired of always trying some new diet with little to no results. Tired of feeling out of control. I was finally willing to give up the fast food, buffets, and margaritas.

I went back and forth about wich surgery to have, and came to a decision that I felt was best for me. I weighed out all the pros and cons about each surgery. I have done good with LapBand so far, and I am glad I have it. As far as the cost went I started thinking about how much money I would be saving on clothes, food, and insurance.

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How is it going? I decided to do it as I have tried everything else. Were you able to go back to work after a week?

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How are you doing? Tell me about your experience.

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I understand I am borderline diabetic, I take cholestrol and highblood pressure. I am ready to get it done! How long was your recovery period?

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    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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