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the end of sex



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so i need some help in a bad way ladies. in october i had a hysterectomy and since then have no desire what so ever to have sex. this is not good. i used to have a healthy sex drive. now i have none. literally NONE! its starting to cause problems with my hubby. he doesnt understand that i dont like being like this either. does anyone have any suggestions? ideas? i have called the doctor and they are going to call in some kind of prescription cream? and she said if that doesnt work then we can try changing my hormones. last night hubby was very very mad/upset with me. i just want to get this figured out! thanks!

Edited by want_so_bad

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I have not had a hysto but I have PCOS which causes hormones to go NUTS . My sex drive has gotten much better as my weight came off. But before that, my doc put me on Wellbutrin and antidepressant and OMG did my sex drive come back .

Its been fine ever since then . You might want to suggest that to the doc ?

I know how much of a strain that can put on a marriage its not easy at all

Good luck

Mindy

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You probably are in need of some testosterone cream. It makes all the difference in the world. IT brings the desire back. Are you on any HRT at all. You will need something for dryness as well.

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I too had a hyster, but I got to keep my ovaries. I guess that's why it didn't affect my sex drive. I was just the opposite. for me it was a totally liberating experience, and the freedom from worry and mess and discomfort and bloating was like heaven. I never had to tell my hubby no anymore. I'm sorry it's just the opposite for you. Be very honest with your OB/GYN about this. That is what they are there for. Don't be shy. Maybe have your hubby go with you, so your Doc can explain it to him that it doesn't have anything to do with him. Maybe he'll feel a little better, and be more patient while you get it all worked out. good luck!

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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