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Did I overreact?



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Donna let me correct you. You didn't unleash a sex fiend you've uncovered a sex fiend. Ok! I guess I had to confess.:Dancing_wub:

And I will definitely keep you posted on the adventures of the massage table. Well let me reiterate that and say I will let you know whether the fantasy gets out of hand. :Dancing_sorry: I'll also let you know which title I will identify with...Housewives or Sex And The Lapband. :)

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When we had our bigger house we had a massage table set up permanently in the spare room, and we bought it at Sams Club. It had heavy wood legs, and was solid!

When we opted to downsize, we went back to having only one real spare room (grandkids claim the other!!), so we found one through Walgreens, that folds, it holds up to 425 pounds . It is not wobbly or anything. It is not real easy to put up and down....so it remains up unless we have company or something.

We took a massage class, as well as reflexology classes through our local community college. My DH has degenerative bone disease in his neck, so I even had his PT show me how to best massage it.

One of the best buys we ever made! Years and years ago we quit buying each other gifts for birthdays and Christmas....and instead buy something together for ourselves or take a trip. Our birthdays fall 2 weeks apart. The massage table was one of our first combined gift purchases-----we filled one another stockings with oils and creams, made it a fun time!!! But WELL worth the $$$ spent!

Kat

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My body is aching for a massage.

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I like it for relaxing, even if DH is not around....being able to lie face down and not wrench my neck.....and just concentrate on breathing deeply---almost instantly relieves my stress headaches.

Try looking at the chain drug stores on line---I bet you can find one!

Kat

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I haven't read this whole thread, but Smartie, I think you shreadding the magazine was awesome. I don't think you should apologize, but you should talk to him. :) If you don't like him looking at that kind of porn, he shouldn't look at it. And he shouldn't allow it to come within moments of your daughter. What if he had run into the house for a moment and she had just opened it?

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I'm talking about professional massages. I've heard that in some places they will ask if you would like a "happy ending" (jerk off). In that scenario, I don't consider it cheating. They've already had their hands all over you and while I agree that genitals are generally private and off limits, in this situation, where you have a professional utilizing their hands to take you to a climatic finish, it just doesn't seem like cheating to me. Hands and/or devices after a real massage--I think is OK. Oral or genital to genital is a definite NO NO.

Now, if it's a so-called massage parlor that really isn't one, that's a totally different story.

Okay, I know this is an old post, but I'm just catching up!!! I have to say two things - one, I've NEVER had that offer when getting a massage at my salon, I may have to speak to the manager, LOL - and two, if it was me getting the happy ending, then no, it's not cheating, if it's dh - then YES it is!!! He doesn't even like his back scratched, if I find out he's having massages I'll know it's just for the HAPPY ENDING!!!

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    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
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    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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