Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

partner worries



Recommended Posts

hiya im 24year old from uk i have been with my partner for 7 years and have 2 little boys 3yrs and 18months when i met him i was prob about 14lb overweight but i was really happy and confident and liked the way i looked but over the years and 2 kids later im 60lb overweight but my partner still loves me we have problems now and again but who doesnt but since i have deceided that i wnt to be banded which is booked for 24 september he seems to be pissed of with me as im self pay and he is the one who brings the money in he keeps goinhg on about that he had better not pay for me to have this done and than i leave him for someone else he seems that he would bemore upset about the money than me leaving him but i feel quite upset that he can even think that i would leave him i would not do that we have 2 children togethor was just wondering if anyone else has partners that got insecure when they lost weight.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

im self pay and he is the one who brings the money in he keeps goinhg on about that he had better not pay for me to have this done and than i leave him for someone else he seems that he would bemore upset about the money than me leaving him but i feel quite upset that he can even think that i would leave him i would not do that we have 2 children togethor was just wondering if anyone else has partners that got insecure when they lost weight.

If hes like my partner he is more worried about you leaving him than he is the money....hes prob having thoughts going thru his head that once your skinny minnie then you'll want to go look for someone better. Before I got the band-several years ago I was successful at losing 55lbs ( I did gain it back)...I felt great but my bf at the time (now hubby) started acting different and made comments about me leaving him...we did end up breaking up for awhile though..he needed to gain his self confidence...anyhow we got back together and hes made a couple of comments about leaving but we're married and I just sat down with him and told him how I felt about that and hes been fine since.....you may want to consider letting him talk to a counselor or something.....GOOD LUCK!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I was just curious how things were going?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest BikiniBeachy

A lot of times both genders will stay or settle with someone because of their weight. The other partner can suspect this, and feel like they may not be able to treat someone the same when they lose weight, that's my personal opinion, not specifically on your situation but in general. This whole process is very emotional.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • bellaamey

      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×