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does this post make me look fat?

vinesqueen

By vinesqueen, in The Lounge

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vinesqueen    2

vinesqueen
Posted

I can be very dense, and this is just something I have never understood. EVER.

Why would a woman ask someone "Honey, does this dress make me look fat" and then get mad if the answer is that they do indeed look fat in that dress?

HELLO!? If you didn't want that answer, why did you ask that question? And why would you be mad because someone was honest with you???

enquiring minds want to know...

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TrishS    3

TrishS
Posted

That reminds me of that stupid Geico commercial or even the twix commercial... I think it is stupid.. That is a question I will never ask.. because i know my hubby will say YES! but then again a 330lb girl would look fat in anything LOL (talking about me of course)

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paula    4

paula
Posted

Ive never gotten mad or offended when my hubby, Mom or sister has been honest about my attire. Actually, Ive invited their opinions MANY times, and appreciated their honesty!

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donali    57

donali
Posted

People rarely want to hear the REAL truth... We like people to buy into our fantasies about ourselves.

I don't know if this is specific to Americans, but I know that for me, anyway, it is very difficult to seperate criticism of ONE thing from judgment of myself as a whole.

Not that there is only ONE thing about me to criticize - just using that as an example... :)

I LOVE the thought of hearing anything "negative" about me, and feeling "Oh? Really? That is SO interesting." like the comment was about someone else, and didn't really have anything to do with me. Be able to HEAR it, evaluate it, take what is worthwhile and toss the rest. But alas... I have not yet become so evolved... :D

Why should it matter if we look fat or not anyway? That doesn't have any bearing on WHO we are. But unfortunately for many of us, OTHERS' opinions of us are WHO we are - or so we think...

Attitude is everything - we're only offended if we think of the comment as a negative, anyway. If we thought that looking fat was a GOOD thing, we'd be flattered. Some people are flattered when people think they are a B!TCH - some people are crushed. We have a lot more control over our perceptions of things than we realize.

Mindset is everything. I believe that more and more everyday.

*****

Oooops... That wasn't the question - I got distracted... LOL

If you didn't want that answer, why did you ask that question?

Good question!!! lol

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BeachBabe(soon)    0

BeachBabe(soon)
Posted

I've learned long ago "if you can't handle the answer, don't ask the question". I'll only ask my kids that question. Everyone eles will either lie and say no, or thet'll have that " I'm so sorry for you" look in their eyes. Plus I don't ask "do I look fat" I ask "do I look nice".

And I hate that twix commercial! I think it's kinda insulting. First of all she's not fat. she just has a big ol' booty. Nothing wrong with that.

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shamrock    0

shamrock
Posted

I find if I have to ask is because I don't think I look good. So even If he would say no I would probably still feel self concious. If you don't feel good in it don't wear it.

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Marimaru    7

Marimaru
Posted

I think what they really mean is "I think I look good, tell me so" or maybe it's "I can't decide if I like this or not, make up my mind for me" but either way, i agree completely.

-side story-

Last night my boyfriend and I were talking about something and he said "I always remember everything" and I replied with "oh yeah? When's our anniversary?" Now, I know for a FACT that he doesn't know this. I don't get upset about it, it doesn't bother me, it's a point of humor between us. It's just funny because that's usually another one of those trick questions.

Sorry, had to share :)

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princess_n_thep    2

princess_n_thep
Posted

That is my biggest pet peeve is when people are not honest when I ask. For gosh sakes!! Don't send me out of the house wearing something stupid!! I mean, how many times have we seen a woman, obviously too BIG, in a belly shirt and thought.... doesn't she own a mirror or have anyone to tell her how bad that looks?

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