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Feeling very overwhelmed and hopeless



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Heeeyyyy. I’m new here. Ive gotten approved and now all of a sudden I’m feeling down. I don’t have the best support system so I’m feeling alone. With all of the permanent changes like taking Vitamins everyday is terrifying me. Any words of encouragement?

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Hey! :)

It is all so daunting in the lead up and the early days, it is going to be an entirely new experience and sometimes no matter how much you prep and read about it, nothing can actually prepare you for the reality. I swear I was so scared/anxious of all the changes prior to my surgery, and worried how I would cope or if it actually would work, but I can safely say that this new change becomes your new normal pretty quickly!

I don't even think about the Vitamins I take, and if anything, I have found that where I am not thinking about food 24/7 or binge eating, I actually have a lot more free time to do things I enjoy!

Don't get me wrong, there are struggles along the journey, and I think it is normal once you have the surgery to be like "wtf have I done", but I can safely say this has been the best decision I have ever made for myself, and I wouldn't change it.

I am sorry you are feeling alone - but you have us! This forum has been the biggest support network for me, and I hope it will be for you too x

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On 3/14/2025 at 2:59 AM, Bypass2Freedom said:

Hey! :)

It is all so daunting in the lead up and the early days, it is going to be an entirely new experience and sometimes no matter how much you prep and read about it, nothing can actually prepare you for the reality. I swear I was so scared/anxious of all the changes prior to my surgery, and worried how I would cope or if it actually would work, but I can safely say that this new change becomes your new normal pretty quickly!

I don't even think about the Vitamins I take, and if anything, I have found that where I am not thinking about food 24/7 or binge eating, I actually have a lot more free time to do things I enjoy!

Don't get me wrong, there are struggles along the journey, and I think it is normal once you have the surgery to be like "wtf have I done", but I can safely say this has been the best decision I have ever made for myself, and I wouldn't change it.

I am sorry you are feeling alone - but you have us! This forum has been the biggest support network for me, and I hope it will be for you too x

Thank you so much. I really needed this reassurance. As I stated I am new here but I would like to thank you all so much because this place really does feel like home. Ive found the most comfort reading the forums and the supporting replies.

I’m preparing my lifestyle change before I have my surgery. I’m finding it to be the toughest I believe because of the time constraints of my career. I drive trucks so I’m away from home most of the day. So prepping meals and eating clean is a struggle bc I work 12-14 hours everyday.

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We all felt that anxiety and worry about how things will change, as humans we don't like change much.

But for most it's a good change aand whilst it's definitely not easy, it does get easier day by day, week by week from that surgery day!

Eating clean whilst on the road is not easy, but also not too hard. You can always take Protein shakes/bars etc with you for your small meals. It's also easy to find rotisserie chicken, or to ask for a burger without the bun etc.

Remembering you CAN'T eat much, and have to prioritise protein first, so it is possible, just make better choices.

The surgery doesn't mean you have to find organic salad all the time, you will be able to cope fine 😊

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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