I’m 3 weeks post op RNY and am now beyond the period of post op pain etc, feeling physically good. But the mind work has been on-going. A friend asked me what my final straw was given there are injectables out there etc and I had to think about it. I didn’t have a crushing moment- it was more a collective of discomforts and feelings of being on the outside looking in, always. It was not finding clothes that fit, turning down invites bc I felt uncomfortable in my body, never wanting to eat in public (like strolling with an ice cream) for fear I’d be called out- essentially the meanness that I encountered on a daily basis. The scrutiny by me on myself was far more viscous than anything anyone might throw down but I didn’t like the wall I’d built up to protect me from the world.

Did you have a moment or was it a slow unfolding that brought you to going forward with surgery? Thanks for your candor and vulnerability on this one ❤️

My husband went on a camping/hiking/biking trip with his buddy. While he was away, I got caught up in my feelings, wishing that he and I could do something like that as a couple, but knowing that I wouldn't be able to keep up, would be uncomfortable, tired, sweaty, etc. I started googling, found a surgeon who was having an initial class for potential patients, and signed up for the class.

A week later, I picked up my husband from his camping trip, and told him I was going to have WLS. I was scared to tell him, but he was so supportive, and I knew I'd made the right decision. It's been a dream life ever since!!!

We still talk about the day I picked him up from his trip and announced my surgery! LOL!!

1 hour ago, longhaul68 said:

there are injectables out there

I was approached by someone recently asking why I would have surgery with injectables now available and that surgeries were on the way out. ?

I told her I doubt they are "on their way out." I explained that I had medical issues that needed to be addressed and the surgery would resolve them.

Also the shot is expensive and not covered by most insurance companies. Any weight lost using it is regained as soon as you stop using it. So on it for life and around $1200 a month.

2 hours ago, longhaul68 said:

Did you have a moment

It was when I heard it called Metabolic surgery and learned that it would heal my prediabetes, my high blood pressure, my insulin resistance, my sleep apnea, reset my metabolism and weight setpoint, stop my progression of stage 3 kidney disease, halt acid reflux, gout, inflammation and water retention, joint and back pain, incontinence and lastly...ability to fit into a pair of jeans

I know of some people who had it done in 2022, so I was intrigued but continued to try to do it on my own and failing.

A week before I called the doctor I went to the Grand Canyon, and among the pictures my husband asked why I was posing a certain way. I wasn't. It hit me that I was no longer 230 but nearing 290, and I had no control of my body. I was sleeved 2 months after that day.

Years ago, I considered it but decided on a last ditch effort to try medical weight loss instead. I also exercised and got down to about 185 (I’m 5’3”). I was able to wear clothes that I felt were “me” after years of wearing crap. I swore to myself I would NEVER get back over 200 and for 7 years I worked to keep it that way. When Covid hit, everything changed. I lost my job and was the sole provider for my family. The scale moved up, finally breaking 200 last year. At that point my clothes started getting tighter and I fell into a deep depression… the worst I’ve ever been… even having thoughts about not being here anymore. I felt like a total failure. For me it was very much like life or death. After one very difficult night locked in my own mind, I decided to have the surgery. It was January 25th. I would do it no matter what it would take, financial or otherwise, and thank goodness insurance covered 80%. I’ll never forget the day I made that decision. It was the first time I felt hope in a really long time.

Edited May 18, 20233 yr by mcipanda

In my early 30s (~220s lbs.), I knew I was in big trouble. Serious comorbities. Monthly ER visits. I was a thin child, a thin teenager but after a horrible thing happened to me, like many others, my weight became my shield, until it didn't... No diets, pills, injections worked. I didn't have the funds nor insurance then but as soon as it was available, I went for it. That's why I am so thankful for the opportunity to have had it. So many people could only dream of it as it is expensive, especially back then. I was in my 40s with lots of comorbities, a little over 300 lbs when I finally got the chance. I'm in my 60s now. I am healthier now than in my 20s. I have had a revision due to a slipped band, then another due to gerd but I never complained about it, as I am so gratefulful I had the chance. Because if it, I haven't been anywhere near 300 lbs nor have I had serious comorbities for 15 years.

I think that the straw that broke the camel's back, was not being able to get into ketosis, despite fasting and eating very low carb for three weeks straight. I figured that my metabolism was broken at that point. I was diabetic, had high cholesterol, and my blood pressure was slowing creeping up. Desperate times call for desperate measures.

A lot of potent medical reasons-makes complete sense. The psychological frustration/angst of feeling uncomfortable in my own skin is what I’m hoping to remember, too, in those years ahead when temptations to let my eating habits loosen a bit.

I had thought about it for years and even asked a doctor about it once but he poo pooed the idea and referred me to yet another dietitian. I lost the usual 5 stone after two years of hard work. This weight came back slowly, so I did weight watchers, 5 stone off again, slimming world, ditto. Always struggling to keep it off and always on a diet. Stopped smoking, had a bad accident and gained 5 stone. People began to stare at me. Getting very embarrassed
Then Covid, gained more. Became Diabetic. Had frightening chest pounding when exerting myself a tiny bit. I became aware that the UK government had me in isolation because I was obese not because I had COPD. I did this to myself and my husband who had to isolate with me.
When we were finally let out I was too embarrassed to go out and found it Impossible to get around a supermarket. No clothes fit me anymore. It would have taken me years to gain enough mobility to make any difference and help me to diet again. Rang my nearest private clinic and tada! Job done.

There were two moments that were my turning point:

The first time I attempted to learn to ride a motorcycle, I was hampered by my belly and thighs and overall being in poor shape. I had to drop out of the class because I didn't think I could safely hold the bike up on my second day.

I'm an aspiring filmmaker. The moment I went from 'I'm not sure about this' to 'This is the right decision' was when I had a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity for a shoot at a place on my bucket list, and by the time I hauled in all my gear and got everything set up, I had no more energy left. I couldn't carry my things up the stairs. I was out of breath and exhausted.

Now almost 2 years later, I can't stop and won't stop. Always on the move. I did this so I could DO everything I wanted to be able to do that my body was holding me back from. (AND I got the motorcycle and ride it CONSTANTLY, sometimes to film things!). Even if I looked exactly the same as I did then (and I don't, I have people who knew me before not recognize me quite often), I would do it all over again just to be capable of all the things I am now.

My doctor brought it up! I actually never even assumed itd ever be an option but I had 2 failed weight loss attempts with him w pcos & thyroid issues. He brought it up, reffered me to the program, did the classes just to see if it'd be a good fit for me & it worked out! I'm very grateful

When my last decent honest-to-god effort to lose weight on my own eventually failed during the start of the pandemic, the crush of despair was honestly overwhelming. I knew WLS was my last option. In a rare spot of good fortune, I had the funds coming in that could pay for both the necessary private health cover, and the flat fee my chosen surgeon offered at his clinic. I waited out the year until my health cover's pre-existing condition wait period was over, and never looked back. I could never have done it without that bit of good financial luck, so I'm immensely grateful. It gave me back my life.

Injectables? No way. Stop taking that stuff and you're gaining it back again. Same as a "normal" diet, only much more expensive. With WLS, it's one outlay of cash, then a permanent solution, which is what I needed. I have this for life, and that's a comfort!

I’d always bounced between being a healthy weight & being on the top end of overweight. Then I became perimenopausal, then menopause & I became obese I swear overnight. Couldn’t lose more than a couple of kilos which would come back even more quickly. I battled for a good 4 years. A friend who’d lost a lot of weight told us she’d had the surgery and about three months later I woke one morning & decided enough. Got an appointment with my GP who gave me a referral to a surgeon (the one my friend saw). It was about 5 weeks between the morning I made my decision & my surgery. So very glad I did.

I didn’t have any comorbidities though I knew if I continued at that weight I soon would. I was fed up with my large body because it wasn’t who I really was. My energy was compromised & I felt I couldn’t play with my younger nieces & nephews as I wanted. Looking back I realise I also used to work harder & do more at work or home to prove my weight wasn’t limiting me. Another factor was I love fashion, clothing designs & fabrics & my choice was being restricted by my size (about a US14).

To me the difference between the surgery & medications is you’ll always have the changes to your digestive system but medications are a temporary artificial change. Of course in the end both depend on your willingness to make permanent changes to how you eat, what you eat & why you eat. If you go back to eating how & what you did before you will regain weight regardless of the surgery (you can eat around your surgery if your determined to) or medications.

All the best.

I broke a chair in a bar by sitting on it. Simple as that. The bar owner reassured me that he'd got new chairs given to him by a brewery and they were rubbish because 2 others had collapsed that week but I decided then and there that I needed to get in control of my weight, having been on a diet for about 30 years by then. Never looked back.

Ive fought my weight all my life- sometimes healthy, but most of the time overweight, so dieting wasn’t new it me, BUT after covid and hitting peri/menopause, the weight came to stay. I was miserable- joint pain, pre-diabetic- and couldn’t lose weight no matter what - even on my usual low carb/keto path. Tried metformin—ugh, Tried contrave- Wellbutrin/naltroxene combo— sicker than a dog and scared of messing with my mental health. HRT was causing the weight to climb- and in november had hysterectomy - and by February hit my highest weigh of 195, Called and got a local Bariatric surgeon consult. Went in and discussed it- decided on VSG. I was NOT going to hit 200 - none of my clothes fit and everything hurt. Found out the process could be months log- so I got on internet and had Mexico- flights, surgeon and two days off work booked and planned for the next month. It cost me about as much as out of pocket would have cost me in the states and i was able to lose weight before surgery- where if id stayed in states, i could have been denied if i lost anything (MX requirement was BMI of 30, states was 35 and comorbitities, i think)

I was READY-and was NOT in the mood to wait. So decided Feb 3, and surgery March 3. So glad i did it!