How did you lose so much weight? How do you answer this question

[omrhsn 608]

This week we have a lot of visitors from the head office (I work in a remote site) and I've not seen some of them for quite sometime. Some even before Covid hit. I was the star of this week with everyone talking about my weight loss and all kinds of praise and encouragement. Almost everyone asked me how did I lose the weight including the big bosses from the client and the contractors.

I've only told my direct boss and the company managing director about my surgery. I took time-off to do it and told everyone else that I was going on vacation. It helped that we were still working from home while I was recovering so nobody noticed any change during that period.

I chose not to tell my coworkers because I didn't want the unsolicited advice and opinions some might have about the WLS and also the follow-up questions. I learned that from when I was on Keto and made the mistake of telling a few coworkers about it. Suddenly I would have people come over to talk to me about it or advising against it etc. It was too much. One guy in particular would come in a for a weekly update on how much weight did I lose etc.

Outside work, only my wife, my direct family and two of my closest friends know about my WLS. They have been very supportive and helped me throughout.

I've been telling people that I was on KETO, then started a low-carb diet and exercising. I even have a photo of me on my maintain bike to prove it 😂. I would love to hear how did you respond to such questions / remarks?

Edited February 16, 2023 by omrhsn

[Merri Beth 96]

Depending on who is asking I will tell them I had the surgery others i just say "really, you think I have lost weight?" then shrug my shoulders when they say "yeah you are disppearing before my eyes."

[omrhsn 608]

16 minutes ago, Merri Beth said:

Depending on who is asking I will tell them I had the surgery others i just say "really, you think I have lost weight?" then shrug my shoulders when they say "yeah you are disppearing before my eyes."

Yeah. There is one guy who always comments on my weight loss every time we cross paths. It was fun at first but now it is annoys me. Now I tell that I've hardly lost any weight, laugh and walk away.

[catwoman7 10,867]

I was honest with other obese people. With non-obese people, unless they were a close friend, I just told them I'd been working with a dietitian and exercising like a fiend (which technically was true - I just omitted the surgery part). Skinny people usually believe that schlock.

[omrhsn 608]

15 minutes ago, catwoman7 said:

I was honest with other obese people. With non-obese people, unless they were a close friend, I just told them I'd been working with a dietitian and exercising like a fiend (which technically was true - I just omitted the surgery part). Skinny people usually believe that schlock.

One of the close friends that I told about my surgery was bigger than me and I was trying to convince him to do the WLS. He is still hesitant tho. One day, we were out eating with other friends and I said I want the smallest burger without the bun. He said - oh you can't eat that because your tummy got smaller after the operation? Luckily the place was loud and no one paid attention. Them skinny people will definitely buy it 😂

[Arabesque 6,481]

I didn’t/don’t tell everyone about my surgery. If asked, I said I was working with my doctor & a dietician. All true. I did a lot of reading. Also true. I worked out a way of eating that works for me which isn’t a recognised diet (because diets don’t work in the long term). True too. I often add this is what works for me but your needs are likely different so your way of eating will be different too. And like @catwoman7 I would leave out the surgery part.

[omrhsn 608]

43 minutes ago, Arabesque said:

I didn’t/don’t tell everyone about my surgery. If asked, I said I was working with my doctor & a dietician. All true. I did a lot of reading. Also true. I worked out a way of eating that works for me which isn’t a recognised diet (because diets don’t work in the long term). True too. I often add this is what works for me but your needs are likely different so your way of eating will be different too. And like @catwoman7 I would leave out the surgery part.

I feel that some people are genuinely interested to know so that can do something about their own weight. But some are just nosy. Like you I also suggest things that might help (consuming less carbs, exercising etc) but omit the WLS part.

[summerseeker 1,850]

Like @catwoman7 I tell overweight people who genuinely want to know how I did it. Skinny people - I just say I do a low or no carb diet. If they say how much weight have I lost, I just say a lot and laugh or have I ? My family I tell the truth when ever I meet them. Its too late for them to have an opinion.

I have found that nobody understands my tiny meals. Eating out is really tough.

[kcuster83 1,502]

I don't tell people and didn't tell many people beforehand. Maybe 5 people know (at least directly know) Who knows what rumors have traveled or who ran their mouth. haha

Anyway, I get asked "what is my trick", "how are you loosing weight" ETC!.... A LOT, I simply say, "eat less and count calories". Which is exactly what I am doing.

[Danpaul 42]

At work I said me and four other ppl in my building put $1000 into a pool and the person who lost the most weight won the 5K. I of course said I came in a distant second. At home I told ppl that we had the "contest" at work. The only ppl who know about my surgery are close family members. To this day ppl ask about that "contest"

[SpartanMaker 676]

I tend to just say "eating less and moving more". It's factually correct and avoids any judgements or follow-up questions I might get if I went into more detail regarding surgery or my specific diet & exercise routine.

[Bandedbut 25]

Funny, I was thinking about asking this as well! I had the lap-band in 2007 and only told a handful of people I knew would be supportive. I would simply say eating a lot less and exercising and shrug. By the time I was around my goal weight, I was more honest about it, but now that I think about it, skinny people were more dismissive of the surgery, like it was cheating.
Now I'm scheduled for the sleeve next week, and again have only told my husband, sister, and one friend that also had the surgery for now. Post surgery I will let more family know as needed, but still plan to be very selective. I love some of the answers above!

[Fred in Pa 231]

Technically, they should not even be asking in a professional environment.

But, tell them an old gypsy touched your cheek and whispered “thinner”. Then walk away. That’s sure to get a laugh.

Edited February 16, 2023 by Fred in Pa

[Sigh 192]

I’m with you. I dont plan on telling ANYONE about my surgery because im so tired of the same behaviors when i would lose or gain in the past— oh you’re doing XX diet? That is so bad for you, etc…I’m going to say i just started working with a doctor and focusing more on my health, not the weight.

Not sure how i will explain the smaller meals, but ill work around it when it comes.

[Spinoza 1,180]

I explain the small meals by saying 'OMG I ate just before I came out - I was starving, honestly couldn't hold out!!' or simply 'I'm just not that hungry at the minute'. Apparently these are actual things that happen to actual (thin) people. Never happened to me when I was morbidly obese, but people do seem to swallow this without question. Just makes social interactions around food a bit easier to navigate (for me).

What I also do (and I know this isn't to be advocated in all situations, and certainly not with any frequency) is completely cheat on the rules by eating mainly carbs and drinking fluids at the same time on purpose so I can squeeze a bigger volume of food in (because it's clearing through my pouch quicker).

Actually, usually I have to combine both these techniques in order to pass as eating even a close to normal amount when I'm really under scrutiny (I have a distant friend with a band and suspicions, LOL - she stands down when I eat several slices of pizza in one go with a beer, because that doesn't fit with her knowledge of bariatric surgery). That occasional excess is totally worth it to me but I stress that's just my way of navigating what I have to. Also when I don't have the confidence to sit tasting just bites in the middle of a 6 course tasting menu with other people, and I just want to deflect attention. It is absolutely AMAZING to me at this point how much you can dump onto other people's plates with a 'OMG you HAVE to taste this, it's amazing!' ending up with just the bite or two that you wanted in the first place.

When people ask how I have lost so much weight I say I dieted very strictly for over a year. Which is factually accurate. I am very careful not to lie. I would find it really hard to answer the question 'did you have bariatric surgery?' but nobody has ever asked that specifically.

I know it all sounds a bit cloak and dagger and in a way I am envious with those of us who can be more open, but I am done with people having opinions on my weight - even less so now that it's a socially 'acceptable' weight. I told my partner and two children - nobody else's business.