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Struggling! Motivation needed please :)



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Hey Gals! I'm really glad that there is a separate room for just us women! So I been struggling lately since surgery. I am 6 weeks post op and I was told that I can transition into soft foods, they told me between phase 4-phase 5. So I am just now starting to do that...but lately, I just feel like everything is a chore especially getting my Water in. Since my surgery, I haven't done even 30oz of water per day but now im starting to finally do that, I actually woke up early this morning and set my timer for every 5 minutes to take a sip of water. I am almost done with 33oz so far and its not even 10am yet where im at. But I just feel like I should be losing more at my size. I started last December at 470lbs, before surgery I lost 70lbs and since surgery 6 weeks ago I have lost 55lbs but I dont know why, it just seems like I should have lost a lot more weight thus far. I went 2-3 weeks in the 360s and it started finally coming down again....but now the scale isn't moving again. I been exercising more than I did early on, started to go to the gym and starting to drink my water now. I just feel kind of just ugh, almost feeling like, why did I get this surgery? I also have a hard time knowing when im full sometimes and even when im feeling full, I have a hard time learning to stop when I do feel full, which before surgery that was always a challenge. Anyone else experience these feelings? I just feel like im way more obsessed with my weight than I was before surgery.

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You lost 55 pounds in six weeks (down 125 pounds total) and you’re questioning your decision? That’s an amazing weight loss already! Remember, the less you weigh, the slower the weight comes off. I definitely understand being obsessed with the scale but I encourage you to focus on NSVs also. And think about long-term goals. I know it’s going to take me about a year to lose 115 pounds, so I am taking it day by day. I recommend working with a bariatric therapist or seeking behavioral strategies from Overeaters Anonymous or a mindful eating program to learn to stop eating when full. It can be really tough especially when you love the food you’re eating. But, this is a journey and a battle and we have so many resources to help us. Good luck!

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55 lbs in six weeks is amazing. I'd lost 28 lbs by the end of month 2 (I just checked my records). I don't know what I was at six weeks out since I only put my weight in my spreadsheet once a month (on my surgery date), but since I was 28 lbs by eight weeks out, I would have been less than that by six weeks out - maybe 23 or 24 lbs lost by then. And I was no light weight - I started out at 373 lbs. Not sure what you were expecting, but 55 lbs in six weeks is an amazing loss!

also, stalls are very common - most of us have several of them on our journeys. When you hit one, just stick to your program, stay off the scale for a few days if you need to, and know that it will break and you'll be on your way again.

Edited by catwoman7

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2 hours ago, Kat L said:

Hey Gals! I'm really glad that there is a separate room for just us women! So I been struggling lately since surgery. I am 6 weeks post op and I was told that I can transition into soft foods, they told me between phase 4-phase 5. So I am just now starting to do that...but lately, I just feel like everything is a chore especially getting my Water in. Since my surgery, I haven't done even 30oz of Water per day but now im starting to finally do that, I actually woke up early this morning and set my timer for every 5 minutes to take a sip of water. I am almost done with 33oz so far and its not even 10am yet where im at. But I just feel like I should be losing more at my size. I started last December at 470lbs, before surgery I lost 70lbs and since surgery 6 weeks ago I have lost 55lbs but I dont know why, it just seems like I should have lost a lot more weight thus far. I went 2-3 weeks in the 360s and it started finally coming down again....but now the scale isn't moving again. I been exercising more than I did early on, started to go to the gym and starting to drink my water now. I just feel kind of just ugh, almost feeling like, why did I get this surgery? I also have a hard time knowing when im full sometimes and even when im feeling full, I have a hard time learning to stop when I do feel full, which before surgery that was always a challenge. Anyone else experience these feelings? I just feel like im way more obsessed with my weight than I was before surgery.

Congratulations first off! You’ve done a lot so far, losing 125lbs is amazing.

The early weeks are challenging especially if you are impatient (like me) and just want to instantly “arrive” (like me). Getting into a good groove takes time and It truly is a journey.

My only bit of advice is that hydration is way more important than eating early on, so if you get a strong routine for that you’ll be good.

After surgery, a lot of us become hyper focused on everything weightloss related. It won’t always feel like an “obsession”. I think that’s a short term issue until everything becomes habit and congratulations again!

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You are doing great loss wise- but Water is CRITICAL! You really need to be getting in a MINIMUM of 64 oz, and realistically more. It does take focus, especially as you are getting used to it, but I find when I drink enough water my weight loss picks up. I also find I just feel better - my joints and energy.

Best of luck!

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You’re doing so well. Congratulations. But I do understand that lethargy that comes when you’ve been so vigilant. Our will power & focus starts to waver & it all just seems to be too hard. I think most of us experience it at some time.

As @GummyBearQueen suggested reflecting on your non scale victories can help regain your focus. Are you moving about more easily? Has your health started to improve? Have you dropped clothing sizes? Is it easier to bathe or do your hair? I loved looking at the graph of my weight loss. Watching that line going in a downwards direction was often more motivating than looking at a number on the scales every day. Also reminding yourself why you made your decision to have the surgery helps. Set yourself some staged goals (every time you lose another 20lbs, walk 3 kms, ...) & reward yourself with a new haircut or colour, a spa day, a new accessory or jewellery, etc. when you achieve them.

How we feel when we’re full or hungry is different after surgery. One of my learnings was the difference between feeling full & having eaten enough. You don’t necessarily need to be full to have had bough to eat. I still ask myself do I need this bite or just want it. It was a bit of a come to Jesus moment for me.

Seems like you’re meeting your Water goals, increasing your activity & if you’re meeting your Protein goals, you’re already ahead of the game.

To begin you are really focussed on your food intake. You’re learning to eat in new ways & it does take a lot of effort to ensure you’re doing the right thing for your plan & for you. I’d like to say in time you won’t be consumed by what you eat (bad pun) but it does get easier. I know what foods I can eat & what ones my tummy doesn’t like all that much (like oily fish or char grilled meats). I’ve worked out what foods I don’t want to eat anymore (processed carbs) & what foods/drinks I’m happy to have less frequently (alcohol) or those I’ll have only on very rare occasions (desserts, cakes, etc.)

I used to worry about how much I thought about food but then I realised I used to think a lot about food before surgery. Before surgery I was always thinking about what I could eat & when I could eat again. Now I think about good food choices, the nutritional benefits of a food & if I really need to eat.

But it is so worth it.

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Thank you everyone! I know I am so hard on myself. I need to just remind myself that I have already lost over 115lbs since only last December, its only been six months which is amazing. I have felt a lot better, im able to actually put on my shoes, able to move more. My joints dont hurt as much as when I was in my 400s. I found myself doing more around my apartment now like re-decorating and I have a much easier time cleaning. i dont ask my fiance to help me out as much, so I definitely feel more independent again. I am having a difficult time getting my Protein and my Water intake in, so I definitely need to work on this. i know today I only did about 30g of protein and I need to do at least 65 grams of protein per day. I tried drinking a Protein Shake to increase my intake but after a few sips, I was so sick of it. So that to me is a bit of a challenge. Today, I haven't done 64oz of water but I have done 50oz of water so far today which is the most I have done in the past month so at least im moving forward....

I definitely need to start paying more attention to the NSV. For example, now when im driving, my stomach isn't touching the steering wheel anymore which means I have a much easier time moving the steering wheel. I also don't need a seat belt extender anymore, however I still use it because my seatbelt sometimes locks up but still....that's a huge accomplishment! Now when im reminding myself how far I have come, I am feeling quite proud of myself. Thank you everyone, this is the motivation I needed :)

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      1. summerseeker

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        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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