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Do you ever feel the need to explain?



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I was wondering if anyone ever feels the need to explain they've had surgery when someone comments on their weight loss. My neighbor has commented on my weight a few times as I've been losing and, for some reason, I feel I should tell him I've had the lap band surgery.

I also feel that way about a woman that works in my office building. The other morning she complemented me on how good I looked and then said, "I wish I could lose just FIVE pounds. What are you doing?" I said thank you and told her that I stepped up my workouts (which I did with Smart Curves). But feel like I should explain that I've had the surgery. Not everyone in the building (about 50 people) knows I've had the surgery, just a handful. I don't really care who knows but don't necessarily want to come out and advertise it.

Does anyone else feel awkward when someone makes numerous comments about their weight loss?

Chichi

s:235/c:183/g:150

ht: 5'9"

banded: 10/26/06

Dr. Raja, San Antonio, Tx

01/19/07: 1st fill, 2cc's

11/28/07: Complete Unfill

01/21/08: Scheduled fill

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At first, I didn't tell anyone. I thought it was a very personal issue. Now, there are some people I don't mind telling and others I will never tell (i.e., my ex husband). Most of the time if people comment on it, and especially if they have a weight problem and mention their struggles, I will share my band experience with them. But, when I wasn't telling people about it, I had no guilt over not telling them about my band. I just said I was on a new weight loss regime, which was true.

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I was wondering if anyone ever feels the need to explain they've had surgery when someone comments on their weight loss. My neighbor has commented on my weight a few times as I've been losing and, for some reason, I feel I should tell him I've had the lap band surgery.

I also feel that way about a woman that works in my office building. The other morning she complemented me on how good I looked and then said, "I wish I could lose just FIVE pounds. What are you doing?" I said thank you and told her that I stepped up my workouts (which I did with Smart Curves). But feel like I should explain that I've had the surgery. Not everyone in the building (about 50 people) knows I've had the surgery, just a handful. I don't really care who knows but don't necessarily want to come out and advertise it.

Does anyone else feel awkward when someone makes numerous comments about their weight loss?

Yep I understand - but why do we need to justify - it's us doing the work not the band the band is just a tool - I feel that with some my weight loss has been discounted cuz they know about the band, like it's the band is the main reason for lossing the weight - I think the main reason I am losing the weight is cuz I eat healthy 98% of the time - i exercise 5 days a week

The band helps me stay motivated but if I wanted to - I could eat around the band and not have been as successful as I have been..

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I agree...I have this same feeling and sometimes I share it, but other times I keep it to myself.

You don't need to justify yourself...you are doing the work with the aide of the band....

Good luck for continued success!

Rain

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I dont feel a need to justify but if anyone complements me on weight loss or asks specifically how I did it I tell them.

I would HATE To think I made someone go from talking to me to having a miserable binge at McDonalds becuase how come I have all this willpower and self control and they cant do it? I think it sometimes really upsets people who are struggling with their weight to see someone else succeed, not in a nasty way but in a way that makes them feel down on themselves, so I'm up front about having had surgery.

If they want to say "oh, she's not all that then, she had surgery, so it was easy for her" well that's their problem and self delusion, not mine.

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I think I'd probably tell if the person was a) overweight, and b)nice. I would never tell an uncompassionate, skinny biatch, who has never had a problem with her weight, just exactly how I'm doing it.

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A girl who works at my company came by my office about a year ago. She had been very obese since I had known her and all of a sudden she was very slim. I asked her what she did (this was pre-lapband for me) and she simply said "portion control". Well, you can't argue with that. I still wonder today if she had a band done, but I thought her answer was good.

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WOW Kacee you and I are on the same wave length I think!

Last night I DH and I went to his office Christmas party. Most of them hadn't seen me in months...I got a lot of WOW! You look GREAT! Then one lady asked me "How did you do it?" I said, "eat less and move more". She said, "oh, you're not doing any particular diet?" I said "nope".

I guess I felt a tad secretive...but my husband doesn't want anyone in his office to know he had WLS, so if I told them I did...the cat would be out of the bag. Also, I didn't feel like going into it at a party.

I kind of take it on a case by case basis...some people I tell, others I don't.

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Some of my co workers know, and some of my family and friends know I've had it done. I don't mind people knowing, but sometimes it can be annoying explaining what the lap band is and what it does to every person. I did weight watchers before (lost 75lbs at one point), so I'll just tell the people I don't want to know that I'm back on that...I think telling people can be good, if you need the support.

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I'm not banded yet, but when I am I'm just going to say that I am watching what I eat *the truth* and exercising *also the truth*

No one at my work knows that I'm having the surgery, and I want to keep it that way.

It's a personal struggle I've had all my life, and now it's a personal journey to control my weight...

I like what Transformer said:

"I just force my luscious lips to form the words "Thank you!" happy.gif"

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I'm a little torn over this question. Even though exercise and Portion Control are important to the our success with the band, we also know if that's all there was to it, we would have been successful at this years ago. And even if we could just eat less and exercise more in order to lose, that doesn't seem to guarantee keeping it off. I'm proof of that, especially the last time four years ago when I lost 70 pounds and fought the regain of every pound. But I guarantee that many people who have never had a weight problem -- many of whom do absolutely nothing to stay thin -- think smugly that it's just a matter of eating less and exercising more and if that's all we tell people, we help perpetuate that myth.

On the other hand, I'm a private person and I don't believe it's anyone's obligation to become an evangelical for weight loss surgery. We all have a right to privacy. I also believe that a lot depends on who it is and where the conversation is happening. Some people are just being polite when they ask and others are genuinely interested. If I think I could help someone but it's not the right time for an involved conversation, I might just say that I'm working hard but I have a secret weapon and if they're interested, call me later.

I haven't lost enough weight to get comments from anyone and I don't think it's the same to tell people what the results SHOULD be rather than what the results ARE. I applaud those who choose to tell and I respect those who choose not to. How's that for straddling the fence? :P

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I applaud those who choose to tell and I respect those who choose not to. How's that for straddling the fence? :)

GOOD JOB :clap2: THERE REALLY ISN'T A RIGHT OR WRONG ANSWER...

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My answer changes depending on how they're asking. If it's just a general off-the-cuff inquiry, I give them the "portion control and exercise" answer -- which is true. If I think the person is really struggling with their weight, then I explain the band and the experience I've had with it. Some people at work know, some don't, and I don't care if some people think of it as a shortcut.

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      Soooo I am coming to a realization
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      1. summerseeker

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