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Bitching "fiance"



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Very Very common - There are millions of posts on relationship issues, From a Guys point of view we are just stupid and cave man like! We often get in trouble for doing stuff we do not even know we are doing.

My view light his ass up and explain you views! He may be jealous and threatened by the surgery

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Very Very common - There are millions of posts on relationship issues, From a Guys point of view we are just stupid and cave man like! We often get in trouble for doing stuff we do not even know we are doing.
My view light his ass up and explain you views! He may be jealous and threatened by the surgery

Thanks for the advice, I've tried. But will try again

Sent from my 5032W using BariatricPal mobile app

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I was married to my now ex for 26 years. When we first got together i was all of 100lbs. Then after years i put on 132lbs. Weight got up to 232lbs in 2009 i got banded and lost 89lbs. He hated it.... from the started. He never wanted me to have WLS in the first place. The more i lost the worse it got. The sad thing was, i lost the weight because i thought it would bring us together. He hated the attention i got, hated that i got more confidence, hated that he lost more and more control over me. Started accusing me of cheating. Stopped having sex with me... well maybe once or twice a year. He would say the worst things and make me feel horrible. Asked him to go to counseling, he said he would go if i paid for it cause there was nothing wrong with him. In july of 2016 i told him that if things didn't change i was filing for divorce. So no changes... i filed January 2017.

I had to realize that WLS does change everything.... not just our weight.

Go on youtube and watch this video.

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Wow Great post above love it

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Major changes always put relationships to test, be it a romantic one or not.

"Major changes" not only meaning weight loss. It can mean e. g. having kids, entering the work force or leaving the work force, a chronic illness etc. - I'll bet the people being in long term relationships know what I'm talking about.

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I hate men like that....make us look bad.. Insensitive. Insecure. Sad man.

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46 minutes ago, Superman84 said:

.make us look bad.. Insensitive. Insecure. Sad man.

I agree Not all of us men are insecure, never understood the controlling thing, guys i am just to layed back to control, but sure have seen guys that should have there others on freakin leashes to keep them happy.

Just work it out - or move on, You can always join my Charlie Manson Cult in florida here, However we do not kill people, we can be hippies but we have to shower, No drug use, but happy, sex, and music are ok! To join just go to my new website. www.WLS-Females only-cult.com and sign up for free

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Major changes always put relationships to test, be it a romantic one or not.
"Major changes" not only meaning weight loss. It can mean e. g. having kids, entering the work force or leaving the work force, a chronic illness etc. - I'll bet the people being in long term relationships know what I'm talking about.
I know exactly what you mean

Sent from my 5032W using BariatricPal mobile app

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I hate men like that....make us look bad.. Insensitive. Insecure. Sad man.
I've never understood it.last night I asked if he's noticed and he said yes, in my face and ass but he doesn't want me to look anorexic either. He said when we got together I was hot and I still am ...for now .

Sent from my 5032W using BariatricPal mobile app

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19 hours ago, BayougirlMrsS said:

Go on youtube and watch this video.

He might have become a kind of shady guy (or so I've heard) but he still has some damn good videos out there worth watching.

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3 hours ago, AJ Tylo said:

I agree Not all of us men are insecure, never understood the controlling thing, guys i am just to layed back to control, but sure have seen guys that should have there others on freakin leashes to keep them happy.

Just work it out - or move on, You can always join my Charlie Manson Cult in florida here, However we do not kill people, we can be hippies but we have to shower, No drug use, but happy, sex, and music are ok! To join just go to my new website. www.WLS-Females only-cult.com and sign up for free

it happens the other way too..... lots of women can't handle than man looking good and getting attention.

Heheh.... Aj. You forgot to say clothing optional. Naked pie eating is acceptable...lol

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3 hours ago, mamakoch said:

I've never understood it.last night I asked if he's noticed and he said yes, in my face and ass but he doesn't want me to look anorexic either. He said when we got together I was hot and I still am ...for now .

Sent from my 5032W using BariatricPal mobile app

mama.... he sounds like a very insecure man/boy..... I really hate to say it, but, he will not be with you for the long run. Mine actually told me to gain my weight back. That i looked like a bag of bones... (i didn't) and that i was prettier when i was fat because my wrinkles in my face didn't show...... It took many years for me to get the nerv to leave... but it was the best thing ever..... I didn't realize how controlled i was till after i left and looked back on my 26 years with him.

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There is always joining the Aj cult in florida - See above

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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