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I can’t express the frustration and emotions I have gone through this past week. I literally feel like I am grieving. I got to the end of the Whole process. I used sick days from work to go to my countless appts. I paid for all these pre-op visits including heart stress test and echo that surgeon required for pre-approval. I have spent countless hours reading posts, watching videos, following journeys, making notes and lists. I paid for my surgery in full and surgery scheduled for July 18th. I was so pumped and happy that I finally had some hope of being able to walk without pain, get rid of this miserable sleep apnea machine, get on the right path to lower cholesterol and blood pressure and hopefully not end up immobile like my mom who had her first heart attack at my age. Then I got the call... you have been denied! How? How can this happen? Why put me through all this time and money, get my hopes up, to deny me? I am so beyond mad. Considering I hadn’t told anyone but my husband, I have no one to vent to... so I’m venting to the only ones who can possibly understand my tears.

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I feel for you. So sorry you're going through this. Did they say why you didn't get approved?

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Yeah I would like to know myself! Do you have time or resources to devote to getting this capricious decision overturned?

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I am so sorry you have been denied. It has to be a horrible feeling especially after working so har for this and looking forward to the surgery. I would say this is not the end and take a step back and look at why you were denied. Maybe something was missed on the paperwork submitted. You should have been sent something of why you were denied. If not call your insurance and see if there is something else needed. Your surgeons office should be able to help you as well. They make money by doing the surgery so they may be able to give you some advice on getting approved. Don’t give up, just regroup and find out what needs done. Don’t give up.

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When I first applied for process, I went through my pcp. Apparently they measured me wrong and put me at 5-2 instead of 5-3. My measurements put me right at a 35 BMI, which is lowest bmi they will accept into program, but... I have many medical issues. So, when I got to my first surgical visit they measured me at 5-3 so I was at a 34.2 BMI so I gained a few lbs and came back. Then we continued with entire process, MANY appts, which you all know process. After I paid and scheduled surgery date, ins called me 3 days later and said “she had GOOD news, I was just too skinny to have the surgery”. I begged, cried and pleaded with her. As soon as I got off phone with her I drove straight to surgeons office and cried to them. They called insurance and plead my case. Then I called insurance back next day. I don’t know how else to fight it. Its a done deal. All over an inch discrepancy or 3 lbs... doesn’t matter that I have cholesterol of 300, prediabetic, fatty liver disease, sleep apnea, high bp, plantar fasciitis, auto immune and my mom had her first heart attack at 50.

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I am sorry to hear that you were denied after completing all the requirements. How could they denied you after you paid the surgeon in full. Your BMI is low but you mentioned that you have sleep apnea and high blood pressure which is 2 qualifying commodities. I hope you are able to proceed with the surgery.

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Horrible. If you paid surgeon who denied? Insurance? Did they say why? Sounds like surgeon should be able to help you. Sounds like you have a case to me. Do not give up. Fight for this life saving surgery.

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Insurance told me that they have so much money allotted for this surgery, so they can’t allow it for everyone. I heard way too many wanted in the program this year so they were looking for mistakes I’m sure.

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Go through the appeals process and see how it turns out. But what did you actually pay for? Can you get a refund?

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I know it feels like a letdown, but look at the upside. You're only 200 pounds and your BMI isn't that bad. It might be something your doctor and the insurance company feels you can work on without surgery. You sound like you have a lot of get-up-and-go and are determined, so I bet you can do this. You've got this! Hang in there.

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I just looked at your profile. We are so similar. 5'3 but you let your weight fall to 197 that puts you at 34.9 bmi. It is a 40 bmi no comorbilities. Or a 35bmi with comorbilities. I had to keep above the 35bmi to qualify for surgery. I let my lowest go to 200 to be in range. Your Dr. And Surgeon should have let you know this. I would get the qualifications from insurance if you have the comorbilities just put on a little weight.

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Yeah gain a little weight, don't remove your shoes, put rocks or fishing sinners in your pockets, be. a devious if necessary. You have enough co morbid and potential co morbid that I feel this quibbling is asine. 34.9 isn't that far from 35 , wait to have your💩 Poo until after your next weighing. The grieving is not good for you, you may have a heredity tilt towards joining your Mama early, now that we have met you, we sure don't want to lose you.
I have a bent towards depression myself, put up a yellow caution flag until they realized not having my surgery had put me in a BLUE FUNK, my surgery instead of making me worse helped me get better! And , knock on wood, I am truly better now. Just like any other addictive I will always have depressive tendencies but they are pushed to the rear and don't affect my daily life anymore.

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There is no next appt. I am out of the program... no more appts.

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1 hour ago, GradyCat said:

I know it feels like a letdown, but look at the upside. You're only 200 pounds and your BMI isn't that bad. It might be something your doctor and the insurance company feels you can work on without surgery. You sound like you have a lot of get-up-and-go and are determined, so I bet you can do this. You've got this! Hang in there.

I am sorry but this post really upsets me. You see all the health issues this woman has and fears of a heart attach how can you minimize her struggle? We are suppose to be supportive and come to this group for support and guidance. I am in the 35 BMI and struggled my whole life with ups and downs. I lost 30lbs thru Keto and put it back and the dr said that was worse than the weight so I made the decision not for hopes of a bikini but for health reasons. She needs this surgery for the same reasons, so she can lose and keep off the weight. If it was so easy no one would need surgery.

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1 hour ago, Jemma23 said:

When I first applied for process, I went through my pcp. Apparently they measured me wrong and put me at 5-2 instead of 5-3. My measurements put me right at a 35 BMI, which is lowest bmi they will accept into program, but... I have many medical issues. So, when I got to my first surgical visit they measured me at 5-3 so I was at a 34.2 BMI so I gained a few lbs and came back. Then we continued with entire process, MANY appts, which you all know process. After I paid and scheduled surgery date, ins called me 3 days later and said “she had GOOD news, I was just too skinny to have the surgery”. I begged, cried and pleaded with her. As soon as I got off phone with her I drove straight to surgeons office and cried to them. They called insurance and plead my case. Then I called insurance back next day. I don’t know how else to fight it. Its a done deal. All over an inch discrepancy or 3 lbs... doesn’t matter that I have cholesterol of 300, prediabetic, fatty liver disease, sleep apnea, high bp, plantar fasciitis, auto immune and my mom had her first heart attack at 50.

Did you have shoes on? It isn’t over. You just need to meet the weight requirements. You can do it and qualify. Unless you wanted to fight the inch maybe you had shoes on etc. Call your primary and the surgeon and find out what you need to do. It may be a few more steps but you can make it happen. If you have medical records online you can look at previous heights etc and see if they have others in a as 5.2 but I think the easiest would be put on weight and start again. Don’t give up.

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    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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