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To tell or not to tell



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I started telling friends and family and then I realized the friends I told were a mistake because they will then tell everyone ... I felt some animosity from them making jokes and comments .. I also feel like my family sees it as I took the easy road .. so now I tell no one and I don’t post on social media

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I am at the very beginning stages of my journey... so far I have only talked with my Husband about it. I am unsure if I will share this journey with anyone else besides my husband and my brother. I just barely told my Husband I wanted to take this journey as it is something I have been going back and forth on for two years now within myself. I am hesitant to share this with my parents because my mother is very judgmental and honestly I rather not hear her negative comments.

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My surgery is scheduled for May 7th. I've told my parents, in-laws, and a few select coworkers. (Those inside the circle of trust. ) My husband has been with me every step of the way so I didn't really have to tell him. My official story at work is that I'm having minor, routine surgery, which I think most of my awkward male coworkers (I'm an engineer.) thought meant I was having my lady bits out or adjusted. I've got theoretical money on which co-worker will make the socially oblivious comment first.

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I have not told anybody besides my husband and kids and a few in my family. But I would rather keep it that way.

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Like a few others, only my husband knows. It's worked out well for me and I like it this way. Sometimes I wish I had other people in my life I could talk to about it but I don't want to open that door, because once it's opened it can't be closed again.

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I have told my closest friends and family but I haven't shared on social media.

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13 hours ago, Veronica Garza said:

I started telling friends and family and then I realized the friends I told were a mistake because they will then tell everyone ... I felt some animosity from them making jokes and comments .. I also feel like my family sees it as I took the easy road .. so now I tell no one and I don’t post on social media

None of it is easy!

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I told a very select few, and I’m glad I didn’t tell more people. I don’t need the world of Facebook watching (and judging) my journey. I think it could be a good level of accountability for some, but for me, no way.

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15 hours ago, arianajo said:

My surgery is scheduled for May 7th. I've told my parents, in-laws, and a few select coworkers. (Those inside the circle of trust. ) My husband has been with me every step of the way so I didn't really have to tell him. My official story at work is that I'm having minor, routine surgery, which I think most of my awkward male coworkers (I'm an engineer.) thought meant I was having my lady bits out or adjusted. I've got theoretical money on which co-worker will make the socially oblivious comment first.

OMG, I laughed really hard about your awkward male co-workers.. I can see this scenario so vividly in my head. I bet theoretical money this will happen as well.

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6 hours ago, baribetty said:

I told a very select few, and I’m glad I didn’t tell more people. I don’t need the world of Facebook watching (and judging) my journey. I think it could be a good level of accountability for some, but for me, no way.

I already feel judging eyes on me.

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As of right now, only my husband, my best friend, and my son (who is also my lawyer) know. I really don't want my ex-husband to know (can anyone relate to that??!), and I know my mother will be judgy McJudgerson about it...my dad would be happy, but he can't not tell my mom...once the surgery takes place and I start to lose rapidly, I'm sure a co-worker will ask. I'll decide then whether to tell...

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I haven’t talked about it at all on social media even when the comments started coming in about why I looked drastically different.

I belong to a body positive group and it’s too hard to articulate in writing all the reasons I did this that aren’t about being physically smaller. I had plenty of confidence and felt beautiful before my sleeve but I know I’m in the minority.

I took guidance from a close friend who had dramatic weight loss with out surgery who didn’t post her transformation on social media. Not because either of us are ashamed.

Now in person I talk about it but there was a small group (The Mr and a few select friends but no family) who knew ahead of my surgery. Afterwards I’ll talk about it pretty freely because going from a size 24 down to a ten in under a year is dramatic. I literally don’t look the same.

I knew ahead of time who I could trust with telling. The supportive folks vs the not.

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I told my friends and my co workers. The only person who has been less than supportive surprisingly was a really close friend. Other than that everyone has been super supportive.

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Same here I didn't shout it from the roof tops.. I did tell my mom and siblings about it when I first started the process with my doctor and wife.. I just told my employees at work 2 months ago and they have been nothing but positive.. all in all 15 family members know and my work crew

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-J727AZ using BariatricPal mobile app

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