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Still have not told my coworkers about surgery



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Knowing how judgmental people can be and already having heard negative comments about WLS, I decided to keep my surgery very private, Coworkers are starting to comment on my weight loss now, however, and some have asked, "What are you doing?" My standard answer is truthful - that I have made some major lifestyle changes that have been ongoing for months and even years. I tell them that I have given up wheat, sugar, soda, alcohol, caffeine, artificial sweetners/colors, additives, and processed foods. I also tell them that I have stepped up my exercise a lot (which they see, because I wear my tracker and try to get as many steps in as I can during a work shift.) Usually by the time I get to the sugar or alcohol they sort of sigh and walk away.

I don't think I am being dishonest, as all these lifestyle changes are necessary for me to be ultimately successful, regardless if I had surgery or not. Anyone not willing to make substantial changes is not going to lose weight and keep it off, so I don't feel I need to go any further. WLS is just one more tool, but doesn't guarantee success by itself, as we all know. But I still feel a little guilty. What do you think?

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No need to feel guilty. You don't owe an explanation or apology to anyone.

It's funny when people ask about your diet or what you're doing to lose weight. They glaze over because it's actual work.

Sent from my SM-G920T using BariatricPal mobile app

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You are right - it IS work and there are no quick fixes, but everyone wants a gimmick. I was there, too. I never tried anything too radical - well, maybe starvation for 25 days was radical - but at the end of the day, it still boils down to hard work, excellent nutrition, Portion Control, and exercise.

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I haven't told anyone at work either. I took 4 weeks off for "surgery" and only the department head knows -- none of my coworkers. I've got 2 more weeks before I return. I plan on saying that my doctor has me on a special diet and exercise program, which is the honest truth! Best wishes to you.

Sent from my SM-N960U using BariatricPal mobile app

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I haven't even told my bosses. There is no need to know. I just said it was something that would benefit the overcoming of diabetes. And I will most likely be out 4 weeks. Done. Don't feel guilty. You need to guard your heart and mind against negativity. Point blank like said b4 you owe no one nothing. Do you boo!

Sent from my SM-N950U using BariatricPal mobile app

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I didn’t tell my co-workers. It’s my business. I don’t feel bad about it at all

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I haven't told anyone at work and plan to keep it that way. All they know is that I am going on vacation. No need to feel guilty. They already see me drinking Protein Shakes and passing on the birthday cakes. At this point they probably assume I am on another extreme diet. lol.

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your medical procedures are none of their business, and you're under no obligation to tell them. I didn't tell them about my colonoscopy, so.....

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I told a few, the ones that I don’t mind knowing, but like everyone else is saying it’s none of their business. I had a friend get very mad at me for “ taking the easy way out” which is not true. So I have chose to keep it to my self since then.. it’s for ME, not them.. I am doing this for me and my health..

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I haven’t told many people who are close to me let alone co-workers because they were quite negatively opinionated about WLS. After a while people get use to seeing you smaller and they stop asking questions. My go to answer is I have several digestive issues that I’ve been diagnose with and can’t eat a lot of things. Not long after I was told I was pre-diabetic and had severe gluten sensitivity, that I had my bypass. So people are ok with my answer and move on. I’m headed into 2 years and people are over my weight loss.

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All of my friends and family members know but my coworkers and bosses do not. I was very vague when they asked about my medical leave. Some kept pressing, so I flat out lied about the type of procedure. I don't feel bad about it. It would be poor self-care to divulge my private medical history to people I don't feel that close to or comfortable knowing.

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I have been very candid with coworkers and have addressed their concerns and misconceptions directly. Doing the research has helped me understand the process more thoroughly too.

Most of my coworkers are supportive. They have been patient with me through the caffeine withdrawal and blood sugar dips.

Still, it's my body and my choice... I feel no guilt or shame when I choose not to share (or intentionally evade questions).

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I have been very candid with coworkers and have addressed their concerns and misconceptions directly. Doing the research has helped me understand the process more thoroughly too. Most of my coworkers are supportive. They have been patient with me through the caffeine withdrawal and blood sugar dips.

Sadly, my family has been more critical of my decision than any coworkers. Still, it's my body and my choice. I feel no guilt or shame when I choose not to share or intentionally evade questions.

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Not everyone deserves your whole truth.

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Exactly @jenifaoh.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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