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Expectations vs. reality



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I'm supposed to be banded on the 27th and this threat kinda is discouraging me..

If you're all dealing with the same struggles now as before, why go through the 15k spent on the band and a surgery?? I keep going back and forth on whether or not this will work for me........:phanvan

Whatnow,

Please DON'T be discouraged, not my intent for sure. Rather, this is a very strong message that the band does work, if you help! If you follow the guidelines! if you are determined!

I understand the line of thought that says, if I can do all that, I don't need the band. Being overweight, and painfully aware of that fact, since 1990, trying diets, exercise, pills and potions...up and down on the scales, I obviously needed more help. And the band has been that...90lbs since mid January 07. I was unable to do that on my own, for whatever reason.

Lately, I am just greedy and moody, having experienced a plateau for the past month. I know it will get back on track soon, but I am anxious, because the success so far feels so good.

Truth? What everyone has told us all along is just that...the truth. The band is a tool, your partner in weight loss. You still are ultimately responsible for eating well, eating healthy, and doing some brain rearranging. Without helping the band, it cannot help you. I dare say no WLS could. I personally enjoy the length of time it has taken to wrap my head around the right way to eat, live and proceed. The guidelines are becoming habits...habits for life.

Good luck, enjoy the journey!

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I know EXACTLY what you mean -- i feel the same way. Funny thing is, i went to my dr and she told me to try and get 200 - 300 more calories in per day -- and i looked at her and said "EAT MORE???" Guess what - i did and the i lost weight immediatly -- i did this for 1 week the slowly went back down to my norm 1000 cal per day. Kind of like kick starting your body i guess, but it worked :)

Lisa,

I think we're on to something here! Been reading up on the "theories" behind this logic, and all points in that direction...eat more! Add more exercise. Keep the weight coming off from the fat stores, not lean muscle. Not letting the BMR slump.

I go in Thursday for a fill/unfill and will ask about it. I will try this ...making those extra calories be of the Protein variety.

Do you plan on alternating...below 1000 one week, above the next?

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My surgeon said something interesting today at support group.

He said we all have the disease of addiction. Addicted to food.

This is a chronic disease. The band just keeps it under control,

but if we let head hunger take over, the disease of addiction

will always win.

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I've got to thinking about myself as one who has a chronic illness, morbid obesity, and I need to follow models out there of how others deal with their chronic illnesses.

It wasn't as depressing as it sounds when I had that aha moment, it actually gives me comfort that I'll be able to function normally but with some constraints, which is much better than being out of control.

just sayin'

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...that I would lose weight more quickly. I've only gotten two fills (surgery was on September 6th) totalling 1.5ccs. I had a doctor say (there are two doctors in my building) that he was going to have me sit up with the needle in me and fill me up until I couldn't drink any more Water. Then he was going to take out a bit and that should be my sweet spot. However, I saw the other doctor that day and I think I accidentally got into the middle of a power struggle. He told me that HE was the one in charge (rather than the other guy) and that wasn't how they do things. So he put in just 1cc. I don't feel very much restriction at all, but have PBs all the time. I guess I'm just not used to eating slowly yet.

I have an appointment for another fill on 11-21, so we'll see how it goes!!

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My surgeon said something interesting today at support group.

He said we all have the disease of addiction. Addicted to food.

This is a chronic disease. The band just keeps it under control,

but if we let head hunger take over, the disease of addiction

will always win.

Thank you for bringing up the word addiction. It's not just head games, head hunger, or getting your shit together. For some it is an addiction.

~this is my personal opinion, take what you like, leave the rest, I'm not pushing my thoughts on anyone, just sharing my experience~

I heard someone once say "I could have just as easily become an alcoholic, but I was mugged by Sara Lee and the Pilsbury dough boy before I was old enough to be seduced by the Jose Cuervo and Jack Daniel's." - Anonymous

My dad and a few others in my family have struggled with substance abuse with drugs and alcohol. I am the only fat one. I feel that I chose food to cope. I saw what drugs and alcohol did to my family and thought I would never be like that. Then facing 300 pounds, one day I realized that I had simply chosen a different drug. A more socially acceptable drug.:hungry:

Sometimes I think it would be easier to be an alcoholic, you just STOP drinking all together, stop going to bars, stop hanging out with drunks. You cant stop eating, stop going to the grocery store, stop going out to eat, stop being around food.

When I hit 280 I considered gastric bypass, at that seminar, I realized the problem is in my head and not my stomach. At that point I joined OA (overeaters anonymous) and over the next two years, I worked the program and lost 90 pounds. The obsession had been lifted. I started changing my life and dealing with old shit and the weight fell off. Then last year I got married, graduated and lost my job. It was a lot to handle, I stopped working the program and gained back 80 pounds in a year.:whoo:

Last April my Dr. Suggested the bypass again, I decided on the band. I figured that with all of my knowledge of working the steps in OA that had helped so many other drunks/foodies the band would be one extra tool in my tool belt. I know it will be hard. I have to do the foot work and USE my tools. I got myself into this mess, and now with help I can get myself out. I am looking forward to my journey with the band. I also plan on going back to OA and working the program again. My addiction/disease will always be there. I simply need to change the way I handle and give in to this disease.

Thank you for letting me share my experience.

I Assume that the band will help me if I use it. This thread has been very insightful and helpful! I'm on this site daily soaking up as much persepective and experience as I can.

Sorry this went on so long.

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I've got to thinking about myself as one who has a chronic illness, morbid obesity, and I need to follow models out there of how others deal with their chronic illnesses.

Hi Oh Juli

Thats interesting too.

I get panic attacks since an incident at my workplace several years ago now, and it never leaves, not totally. And it sneaks up on me, and I cope, sometimes with medication sometimes without.

With my weight, this was badly affected - hand in hand with this incident. I sort of look on that attack and repercussions that is a form of disability that i just need to live with.

With weight, I have always viewed it something that will be with me all my life, but perhaps I should take that a step further, like the panic attacks, as a sort of disability/illness that needs to be constantly dealt with but that I CAN DEAL WITH now I have a band.

Thanks for that insight :)

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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