Identity Crisis after dropping 80lbs in 8 months.

[BlueGirl1920 94]

Has anyone else experienced this? Now that I have lost 80lbs, I am changing in a lot of other ways. I am living my body and realizing that I have so many more opportunities now that I didnt before. I feel like I am reinventing myself. As exciting as it is, it is also a little scary. So much has happened so fast. Please tell me I'm not alone.

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[jennijo 38]

It's a very weird feeling to see yourself in a mirror after loosing a lot of weight. I am almost a year out and have dropped 170 pounds and it is exciting and scary all in the same breathe.

[KimTriesRNY 1,853]

I agree I think it is somewhat normal, especially for those of us that were obese for our adult lives, and never really remember being at a more normal body weight.

I have noticed a difference in the way people treat me out in the world. Now whether that has to do with the fact that I look more normal, or maybe I’m not as self conscious, or it’s a combination who knows. Things are definitely different now than they were 150 pounds ago though.

You are not alone. It is a strange feeling.

[JohnnyCakes 593]

the mental aspect of this surgery is far, FAR more challenging than the physical aspect. and yet it is rarely talked about. that needs to change.

[GreenTealael 25,622]

I agree, suddenly people think I'm their type of because I look a certain way... men and women

Sigh

Guys yell from passing cars, are too forward, stare too long,

Savages

I think I legitimately was followed into the health food store a week ago by a woman trying to talk to me then she realized I wasn't interested in women

It's different now, and not all sunshine and rainbows

Edited September 25, 2018 by GreenTealael

[mjcclkwd 27]

Yes. I have lost 89 pounds. I am more social and outgoing. More attention in general. It is a weird feeling and looking in the mirror shocks me a or of the time (in a good way).

[Frustr8 7,886]

And this is something I really want, will I feel the same when it really happens? Stay turned -folks--- for updates. 🍀👸🍀😛

[vanessagotsleeved 11]

I notice people looking at me.... it’s weird. Also, when you’re fat, you’re not ‘competition’ for other women....
This sounds weird, I know. But I’m 37 years old now and have fluctuated from underweight / normal / chubby and obese and EVERY time I’ve been thin, I have had women be HORRIBLE to me. I am 6 weeks post-sleeve and sitting at 75kgs (150 something pounds) and am probably going to reach 60kgs (120lbs) by Christmas. While I am looking forward to it, I’m dreading the bitchiness and competitiveness that always accompanies being thin..... it’s a funny thing really. I’ve never treated thin people badly and can’t understand why women get so insecure around their thinner counterparts... hopefully now that I’m ‘older’ and married it won’t be so bad?? Although I spent the first 4 years of marriage as very thin and it didn’t seem to male a difference.
Being big - everyone seems comfortable to talk to you, be around you, introduce you to their friends and partners...... not so much when they are ‘threatened’ by you.
This is my experience and I really am dreading going through it again. I’ll just focus on myself and not bother trying to make friends! Lol.

[Frustr8 7,886]

A story from my past. Maybe appropriate, maybe not, but still going to tell it.
I once had a friend who decided to marry a,young man, a nice fellow. Once she married him, she set out to change him , oh nothing escaped her scrutiny, from hair style, to clothing to type of car driven, he wasn't sure he wanted children , they had 5 in 4 years. Then she demanded a divorce, her grounds? " He's not the man I married anymore!" Did she get her divorce, yep, just like she got everything else she wanted. Last time I saw him, he still looked broken, nut managing to keep up with child support for the 5 children he wasn't sure he really wanted. And he will still be paying until the last turns 18. And that ends my story here in Central Ohio.

[BostonWLKC 807]

I still feel the same way... it has been about 9 1/2 months and I constantly don’t recognize my physical self. Although it’s fun looking :)

[wjgo 272]

Well, you know that sort of discussion parents might have with kids before they enter puberty? Well, you sort of entered something like that.

You don't have an identity crisis, because you have a new identity actually. Your new identity is still evolving and forming, whether you like it or not.

And by identity, I mean everything, not just your morals and principles or whatever people think of their "insides." You actually had some insides torn out and rearranged.

One thing that is constant through human history, that you will have to experiences in, will be the economy. You will have access to new jobs you can participate in because you will be physically healthier, or jobs will be easier to perform. You will have new participation in the economy by having access to new forms and a greater variety of fashion because more clothes will fit you (not just fashion, but clothing for sports, work and fun). When you need to buy a lawn chair, or an office chair, finding the chair with a high seating load will no longer be requirement.

You will be healthier and able to participate in more leisure activities, you'll be able to physically stand longer, walk farther and have more endurance. This expands your horizon, and the people you meet and the experiences you enjoy. Even fitting better in an airplane seat, or a bus, makes you more apt for travel. You will find entire ranges of sports now possible. Pre-op, I could not stand for longer than 30 minutes. Now, I can do back to back sword fighting classes. Never conceived the idea I would be able to be a first responder, now - I may be joining a volunteer fire fighting company.

You will be seen differently by other people. This translates to every form of personal interaction, work, personal, love interests at all levels.

I could go on and on. But all of this, put together will give you a new identity. You will be a different person because you will be engaged in society differently.

It all boils down to one thing: Carpe Omnia (Carpe Diem is for pre-op....)