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What to tell coworkers?



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Don't tell anyone at work if you can avoid it. Even close work friends have a tendency to forget to be quiet about it. I chose to tell my work friends, my boss, everyone at work and I'm sorry I did. There are a lot of very supportive people, but there are a few who are toxic. I hate it when I wake up in the middle of the night and instead of rolling over to go back to sleep, a nasty comment they made to me pops in my head! Last comment was: "Oh look at you! Getting so much smaller! You are going to have so much skin to remove!" I know this, I think on it enough without someone who cares little about me say it to my face. My feelings were Iron clad before surgery--now they are tender and easy to trample. If only I'd understood the mental changes better.

So, what to say when people ask how you're losing weight so fast. You tell them, "Everything, I'm doing everything." If you want to elaborate, say you're eating way less, eating way better, and moving a whole lot more. It's simple...and...it's the truth. Good luck! :)

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Told my crew that I will be out on vacation. Of course it's up to whomever to guess what that vacation might entail......

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Just tell them you're having surgery, and that's its very personal to you. Social workers should understand that. I'm a teacher, and several others at my school been sleeved. I'm lucky that I could be open about it. After the surgery, I had to tell my students because I was getting used to eating again. I would have to run out of the room to throw up. They were extremely supportive for a group of 4th graders. They even helped me watch what I ate, and at lunch would make sure that what I had wouldn't make me sick.

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2 hours ago, chelsey211 said:

Since I talked to you this morning about FMLA, I looked into it and I also will not be eligible. My 1 year is not until February. How did you learn about the state medical leave? That is something I may need to check into.

I sent an email to HR directly and asked at what point would I be eligible for protected medical leave. They can't really talk about that with my supervisors so I felt comfortable about that. They told me I was eligible at my 6 month anniversary for the state medical leave (Oregon) and then told me at 1 year I would be eligible for FMLA. They seem incredibly similar and I double asked if this would be enough to protect my job if I needed to take 2 weeks off and they said yes. I would encourage you to send an email directly to whoever handles the medical leaves in the company you work for to ask. My 1 year is in February too, with my 6 month being 8/20 so I made sure my consults won't be until after that date too.

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I would suggest keeping it private. I’ve found that saying I had a hernia repair usually stopped the conversation. When people ask how I’ve been losing weight I usually use the answer of eating less, working out and limiting carbs. Or if I’m in a smart ass mood I say I have a tapeworm😉

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I told every one. I work in a school and had it done over summer break.

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Don't tell anyone at work if you can avoid it. Even close work friends have a tendency to forget to be quiet about it. I chose to tell my work friends, my boss, everyone at work and I'm sorry I did. There are a lot of very supportive people, but there are a few who are toxic. I hate it when I wake up in the middle of the night and instead of rolling over to go back to sleep, a nasty comment they made to me pops in my head! Last comment was: "Oh look at you! Getting so much smaller! You are going to have so much skin to remove!" I know this, I think on it enough without someone who cares little about me say it to my face. My feelings were Iron clad before surgery--now they are tender and easy to trample. If only I'd understood the mental changes better.
So, what to say when people ask how you're losing weight so fast. You tell them, "Everything, I'm doing everything." If you want to elaborate, say you're eating way less, eating way better, and moving a whole lot more. It's simple...and...it's the truth. Good luck!


I love this. I will definitely not be telling any coworkers the truth. Thank you!

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Lucky you! I needed more than two weeks.
I'm really hoping 2 weeks is all I need!

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41 minutes ago, chelsey211 said:
2 hours ago, MissSimpson said:
Lucky you! I needed more than two weeks.

I'm really hoping 2 weeks is all I need!

I hope you need less than that to get to feeling better!

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10 hours ago, MissSimpson said:

I hope you need less than that to get to feeling better!

Thank you!!

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I agree with that it is a personal choice. Just know if you tell one then I am sure most will eventually find out. For just the time off work you don't have to tell them anything. Just put in your time for personal reasons, vacation or what ever you want really.

Even if you don't tell people at first down the road when they see your progress you can then if you feel comfortable tell them that you had bariatric surgery. Don't need to give details or anything that may make you feel uncomfortable.

At the start of my journey I did not tell anyone. I had already gone through my 6 months once before and was originally scheduled for surgery in Feb of 2018 but two days before my insurance denied me. But right before I was due to go off work and I didn't know about my denial yet I did tell two of my coworkers. Kind of felt a off when I didn't have it and I told them I was but they didn't treat me any different. But again it all depends on the person. So now that I am due to have surgery next month they are supportive.

So in the end it is your choice and whatever you feel comfortable with. Just know once they know they may ask questions so be prepared for that whether it is a positive or negative response.

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My advice; don’t tell coworkers. You tell a couple, soon everyone knows. So unless you are comfortable with everyone knowing. Just don’t

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My surgery is in a week and I've told EVERYONE! Friends, family, coworkers, total strangers, and everyone is super excited for me. Luckily, I teach sex ed for a small nonprofit, so we're all pretty open about our bodies. I even have a coworker who had the same surgeon as me! The only unsupportive person I've come across is my neighbor who is even bigger than I am, and I think that's more due to jealousy than anything else.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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    • bellaamey

      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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