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Patient-blaming Stigma



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As you know, the pre-op process can be exhausting with so many appointments. In the country where I live, companies require us to produce medical certificates (MC) if you want to use your medical leave. Recently I had my visits to the dietitian and psychologist and since they are not doctors, they couldn't issue medical certificates. Instead, they gave me Excuse Chits with time stamps on it.

I've done this before (giving my company Excuse Chit in lieu of MC). At the time it was a visit to the physiotherapist. As I'd just broke my thumb around the same time, I think my company assumed my visit was related to the broken thumb and they gave me no issues about it.

This time around, however, my admin interrogated me as to why I couldn't produce any MC. They asked me what the purpose of my doc visits was (in front of everyone) to determine if I could claim medical leave. I may be overreacting, but I suspect that seeing the word 'dietitian' on the chit made them think that my visit was for weight loss and thus cannot be classified as medical need.

I hate that wanting to lose weight (especially when I'm clearly obese) is still considered an elective and somewhat for-vanity, instead of life-saving, must-do action. I think there's this mentality that obese people brought it upon themselves and that they should attempt to lose weight in their own time. Sigh.

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How horrid a system! Can't your PCP or a physician in the dietician office provide this certificate for this? That's crazy nonsense. Don't you have privacy laws that prevent employers from publicly sharing information at work?

Edited by Sosewsue61

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Yikes. What country are you in, Urchin? Sure sorry for your treatment.

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2 hours ago, Sosewsue61 said:

How horrid a system! Can't your PCP or a physician in the dietician office provide this certificate for this? That's crazy nonsense. Don't you have privacy laws that prevent employers from publicly sharing information at work?

I have no idea about privacy laws and such here, guess I should look into it now. My understanding is, only doctors could issue MC and if I’m not seeing any doctor that day, then no MC for me. So from now on I have to schedule my appointments in such a way that I’ll also be seeing a doctor on the day I’m seeing those non-doctor specialists.

35 minutes ago, Creekimp13 said:

Yikes. What country are you in, Urchin? Sure sorry for your treatment.

If you must know, Singapore.

It depends on the company, though. So happens that I’ve got the shitty kind.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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