Ok, so I'm pretty much a vampire. I haven't appeared in a single family photo or event pic in the last 20-30 years or so. I CAN NOT STAND having my piccy taken. (Am I yelling? Cuz I feel like I am?) You know what I'm tawkin' 'bout?

So yesterday I got as dolled up as I ever get, which ahem, means I bathed, brushed my teeth, dried and scrunched up my hair--but I went out on a limb and put on a tiny bit of makeup. I swear to the sweet baby Jesus of the golden fleece diapers, I looked hot. I felt hot. I felt like this! I swear! You shoulda seen me struttin' my hot stuff through the lemon jello section. Mama June, give. it. up. Cuz I was smokin'. You get the picture? In case you don't, I could be this chix sistah from another mistah!

So I screwed up the courage, called myself Felicia, and asked Mr. F. to pop off a few "before photos" so I can use them for comparison. I will suffer through another round the morning of surgery, and then will take them periodically throughout the journey to Oz. (Thank you @James Marusek. I will be eternally grateful for this advice.)

When I looked at them, I almost cried. I thought I'd made such progress. I felt "thin" at my 235lbs. I mean look up at my twin right there. What happened? I almost went outside and ate worms. Not part of my pre-op plan to be sure, but still a powerful source of protein and fiber if you're so inclined...Oh, what I look like...

Do any of you feel the same way or have you had the same experiences??? Just so you know...

Ring, ring...

Hello selfies?

Go screw yourself! Signed,

Sincerely yours,

Body Dysmorphic in Houston

Edited February 5, 20188 yr by FluffyChix

And my life will go on......




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If I were kate...I would move the hell over and let you get up on the door, too.

And the Pie-Hole crack? That's for when YOU made that crack and had tea out my nose.

kakatlady, stop honing in on my Fluffy action! She's mine, dammit, MINE! LOLOLOL

(so kidding!)

Edited February 6, 20188 yr by Creekimp13

Wanna duel over her? Pointed words at 50 paces. Warning I just sharpened my rapier wit. While we're fighting she's liable,to run off with Kathy, the Fluffy Grandma, she's known her longer.

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FYI? I guess I was hangry. I just went and made an iced mocha decaff...cuz you know, my ass isn't frozen enough I thought ice might be good. My bad.

Oh and btw, ladies? Way to reward my attention seeking behavior!

Edited February 6, 20188 yr by FluffyChix

I concede. If you love something....let it go. *sigh*

Jack....

Jack...

Come on --'there are no tears in Texas.

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I think I look like Ursula the sea witch (from the Little Mermaid) without the good boobs. [emoji16]

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@FluffyChix It's so crazy how you can think you look one way, and then be horrified at the reality of a photo, happens to me all the time. I keep hoping it's the photo that is all jacked up, lol.

In my defense, I'm not photogenic at all, I have never taken good photos even at my smallest size. I am so thankful for the digital age and editing capabilities on phone cameras! I've had a lot of anxiety lately because I have to take a new drivers license photo, and those folks are worse than me at taking decent pictures. On the plus side, the new one can't possibly be worse than the one I have now where my fat face fills just about the whole picture area.

And I'm changing jobs at work, which means a new badge ID, which people look at all the time. I have to wear it above waist level for Pete's sake! I drove the HR lady crazy several years ago when we last took my picture, I kept making her do it over, and it wasn't helping me look any better. I've been procrastinating on getting the new badge, but tomorrow is the day I have to do it by, so please send me good photo vibes! And send the HR lady mega-patience vibes, I'm sure she'll need it!

Don't say you didn't see,me coming, world. I'm nearly 6 feet tall, 3 feet wide and,i,have flaming red-blonde hair. Subtleness is not my strong suit. As Popeye says,"I yam what I yam".

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8 hours ago, kakatlady612 said:

First time I heard a recording of my voice I realized I sounded just like Marjorie, the bratty,older sister of Chuck up the street.

OMG, voice records are no better than photographs, LOL.

There is even some scientific reasons why our voices sound different to us than to anybody else - I bet it's the same with a photo vs. the mirror.

7 hours ago, ChaosUnlimited said:

@FluffyChix It's so crazy how you can think you look one way, and then be horrified at the reality of a photo, happens to me all the time. I keep hoping it's the photo that is all jacked up, lol.

In my defense, I'm not photogenic at all, I have never taken good photos even at my smallest size. I am so thankful for the digital age and editing capabilities on phone cameras! I've had a lot of anxiety lately because I have to take a new drivers license photo, and those folks are worse than me at taking decent pictures. On the plus side, the new one can't possibly be worse than the one I have now where my fat face fills just about the whole picture area.

And I'm changing jobs at work, which means a new badge ID, which people look at all the time. I have to wear it above waist level for Pete's sake! I drove the HR lady crazy several years ago when we last took my picture, I kept making her do it over, and it wasn't helping me look any better. I've been procrastinating on getting the new badge, but tomorrow is the day I have to do it by, so please send me good photo vibes! And send the HR lady mega-patience vibes, I'm sure she'll need it!

Oh wow! Saying prayers for you tomorrow that the HR woman gets your perfect piccy on the first take!!! I get it. I think I've never been photogenic, except when I was super little. But have never been able to smile naturally.

NEVER EVER let anyone (who's not a photographer ) take your pics besides yourself. And even then review and redo.

In selfies I look like the talented smoldering eyed ingenue,

Other peoples photos.. Confused, Crossed eye and greasy