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I Think I'm Doing Everything Wrong...and Shrinking



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Yup, same stuff I read. Think I'll keep rolling the dice.:D

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8 hours ago, Raffi said:

Real food sucks...I have it on occasion and 1-2 oz's max. Protein Shake in the morning, then munch on nuts, cheese, beef Jerky and Protein Bars throughout the day, then have a few bites of whatever the fam's having for dinner. Doc said no alcohol for 6 months post op. Yeah, right. I've been drinking as regularly as I did before (sans beer :44_frowning2:) since the full liquid stage. Tolerance was low for about a day or two, then back to normal. Exercising as per the nutritionist's guidelines, though, so not doing everything wrong. 75 pounds in a little over 2 months. Extreme hypertension down to near-normal.

No regrets.

Am I alone in just doing it my way?

Raffi - I feel ya'. You are not alone, my post surgery experience sounds similar. I am (was) a regular drinker before surgery. I think many of the people that will respond negatively to your post probably weren't regulars before surgery. This thread was helpful for me in considering when to indulge:

I am working through making changes in my habit, opting for hard liquor with low calorie or no calorie mixers instead of wine/beer and also trying to save drink calories for the weekend when more social activities are happening, instead of having a 2-3 drinks every night as was typical for me before preop diet and surgery. Abstaining has lead to major boredom in the evenings, especially as my energy levels are increasing from losing weight. I have returned to some of my old hobbies to help this, signed up for an art class, taking tennis lessons and rejoining pole fitness classes.

I think you are going to find that the replies to your post are going to be majorly one sided and in the negative but I wanted to chime in to let you know you aren't the only one!

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The US divorce rate is 50%. The divorce rate for people who have had bariatric surgery is 75-85%

Read that again.

If you have had bariatric surgery, your chance of getting divorced within two years is 75-85%.

Split the difference....and 8 out of 10 of us....will get divorced in the next two years.

There is no way in hell I would add alcohol to that equation and those odds.

it is really important to pay attention to your relationships and do the work required to keep them healthy. I don't see alcohol as a beneficial part of that.

My marriage is incredibly important to me. 25 years this year.

I have seen way too many marriages go down the crapper...over something as utterly unnecessary as alcohol.

Given the physical changes in digesting and tolerating it....and the fact that we're already losing a big coping crutch (food) and that alcohol abuse and dependency are documented to increase post surgery.......it just seems like the perfect storm for a really bad outcome.

To me.

Others will have different views and keep rolling the dice.

To each their own. Free will, and all that:)

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It's kind of like when you're in your late teens/early twenties and not only you can eat any junk food you want and not get fat, you could probably eat the styrofoam container it comes in and be fine. Then, as time goes on, those bad habits catch up to you. Then you end up fat enough that you have to have major surgery...

You can probably get away with not tracking what you eat, drinking as much as you used to drink, eating with little to no plan, etc. for a while. You'll probably lose some real weight, too. Then you won't. You probably won't lose all you want to lose. And you'll be much more likely to gain most of it or all of it back.

This isn't a fear or a superstition I have. It's a thing I have seen in these forums repeatedly. It's what it looks like when someone doesn't make the commitment to changing they need to make and they blow it. It happens gradually, and it's not a straight drop down, so people usually don't even realize they're doing it.

All of this said, I don't think you're doing *that* badly in terms of what you are eating. The scary part isn't the specifics of what you're eating/drinking, it's that you don't seem to have a plan or track things. You seem content to just go with what feels right and trust it work out.

I would only remind you that trusting yourself to eat what seemed okay made you an obese person who needed bariatric surgery.

It wouldn't even be that hard to get back on track. It's just taking a step back, talking things over with your nutritionist, starting to log what you do on MyFitnessPal, trying to have a plan and accountability.

I wish you the best, man.

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12 minutes ago, RussT said:

You posted this thread to get opinions...

Actually, I posted to see if I'd get pointed to a risk more significant than "empty calories" and "might get too tipsy" and "but your doctor said so!"

Nope.

Cheers.

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Etc, that's the most sensible thing I've read in months. Thanks brother.

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Eng, thanks for the link to that thread. Been reading through it. Yup, thems my peeps!

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9 hours ago, Raffi said:

Real food sucks...I have it on occasion and 1-2 oz's max. Protein Shake in the morning, then munch on nuts, cheese, beef Jerky and Protein Bars throughout the day, then have a few bites of whatever the fam's having for dinner. Doc said no alcohol for 6 months post op. Yeah, right. I've been drinking as regularly as I did before (sans beer :44_frowning2:) since the full liquid stage. Tolerance was low for about a day or two, then back to normal. Exercising as per the nutritionist's guidelines, though, so not doing everything wrong. 75 pounds in a little over 2 months. Extreme hypertension down to near-normal.

No regrets.

Am I alone in just doing it my way?

You are a grown man.

You make your own choices. You don't need permission or approval. The only one who has to be happy with your results is you. No judgment from me.. your success is not dependant on anyone of us.

you asked for feedback right? Did you only want to hear your own opinion mirrored back?

3 years later let us know how you are doing. I will be curious to know if you brunt muscle at your size and the Protein intake you are at.

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Engelyn, did I thank you for that link already?

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You're welcome. My answers to those questions are thus:

1. How long did you go before having your first drink? 8 days.

2. Have you had any MEDICAL complications with your surgery that were attributed to drinking alcohol? None so far, but it hasn't been long for me.

3. Have you gained back significant weight from drinking alcohol? Not applicable to me because I am still in the losing phase. I do feel that I would lose faster if I went absolutely dry but I will not be doing that.

4. Have you developed an alcohol addiction post VSG after having been able to control your drinking before? I am drinking less than I was before surgery. I do not think this will be a problem for me, but again I am not that far out yet.

Furthermore regarding food, I am having a similar experience, I am able to eat only about 1-2 oz (by weight) of food at meal times. So, that is hardly anything (like 3-4 bites). So intake for me is typically 2 Protein Shakes, yogurt and for dinner 1-2 oz of food, and Water of course.

Edited by Engelyn

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I'll chime in...

First, I abstained from alcohol for the entirety of my six month pre-op diet program and the first 3 months post-op. I just wasn't willing to derail the progress I wanted to make on the front end of the surgery (where I lost 100 pounds by surgery day) or the first few months post-op.

I took my ex on a monthlong tour of SE Asia at the 3 months post-op point. I spoke with my surgeon about alcohol on the trip, and he told me that I would be fine. His only recommendation was to take it easy and test things out at home before I went out in public with it.

I am now 16 months post-op, and it has been 22 months since I started this journey. I follow a Keto way of eating and am really particular about what I put in my body. I have lost 225 pounds, am below goal, and have maintained beautifully for several months now. Do I have alcohol? Yes, I do. I mostly have red wine and I mostly only have it when I am traveling for work or on the weekends. Drinking has always been a very social thing for me.

Yes, there are statistics about WLS and alcoholism just there are statistics about losing more weight with a bypass than a sleeve. But, I'll same the same thing about the alcohol as I did about the bypass vs sleeve weight loss issue in a thread the other day. It depends on the person. If you were inclined toward alcoholism before, you will be now. If you are eating and exercising like you should, a few drinks (especially with low- or no-carb mixers) probably won't cause you a problem. I had a sleeve and have been more successful than many bypass patients. It just depends on each person's story.

But if your alcohol calories outnumber your food calories, that is an issue. Something to think about.

To each his own. I have no issue with it, and never have gained one once from it, but I am also crazy obsessed about what I eat and how often I imbibe. It's all about balance, in my opinion.

Good luck!

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I'm sure there are plenty of people doing the same. You always have the choice to do what you want, I hope it all goes well for you at the end of the day.

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My doc was fine with me reintroducing alcohol after my 12 month follow-up. No binge drinking mind you, but with-in reason is absolutely fine he said.

I follow all my guidelines and am doing well so far. I don't really break the "rules" on this stuff cause I get sick if I don't follow the protocol.

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Go on on over to another forum and look up Tinman.

https://www.gastricsleeve.com

He is a seasoned sleever that loves margaritas.

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That’s a really large weight loss in a short time. You must be thrilled! Any idea how many calories a day you are getting? Do you track Protein at all? One risk with not eating the right stuff is you miss the protein goals and lose a lot of muscle - of course you can rebuild that later if you want.

Edited by Losebig

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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