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*I apologize for the novel in advance* I can say for me I haven't even had surgery yet but my tentative date is Oct 30th...Whoop..Whoop! But anywho, I AM the heaviest out of ALL my friends, which I have never had a problem with cause I don't let my weight define me, I'm cool, a good person, a loyal friend & have a dope personality on top of all that. But when I started telling my "thinner" & I mean "much thinner" friends that I was gonna have the sleeve surgery, I started getting comments from them like, "Really, how much does the Dr want you to lose?" & I reply with, "well they want me to be around 155 - 170 if not smaller" & everyone that I have said that to, they answer me back with, "well damn I need to start getting in the gym so I can be where you need to be at." I don't say anything cause I'm like whatever, but I don't understand why it matters to them of me having to get to that weight/size. I mean they are all smaller than me now, so why does me getting smaller & healthier have such an affect on them? I guess I'll never understand, but I'm doing this for Me & my friends know how I am though, I'm quick to cut someone out my life that I feel shouldn't be apart of it. My nutritionist would tell me, "Sometimes in this journey you may lose friends before, during or even after surgery. But you didn't do this for them, you did this for You!" Did anyone else encounter comments, or situations like this?

Sent from my SM-J727T1 using BariatricPal mobile app

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There's an unspoken dynamic called the Fat Friend Syndrome.

In some social circles, people are comfortable with the fat person as long as she remains fat. Once the fat friend loses weight and engages in self-improvement, it disrupts the status quo.

Subconsciously, the presence of the fat friend makes some thinner people feel better about themselves and their appearances.

Once you lose weight, several of these thin friends might develop insecure feelings or feel you're in competition with them. When you're no longer fat, you no longer have the dumpy image that instills a sense of security into them.

So, yes, expect the dynamic of your friendships to possibly change with permanence if/when you ever attain your goal weight.

http://brittanyherself.com/cgg/im-the-fat-friend/

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