I've Lost It Today!

[LittleLizzieLilliput 919]

I think people are talking about two different things.

One, folks extrapolating and addressing the OP as if reverting to binge eating and sabotaging their entire life/process.

Two, folks extrapolating and addressing the OP's statement that they understand they over-ate and trying to find their balance.

The OP specifically said they are not looking to punish themselves but acknowledged Portion Control as an issue they need to keep working on. I think admonishing or guilt/shaming a person or trying to scare them is not the way to support our process. I believe in encouraging people to accept and recognize they made mistakes or missteps, using that to learn and grow, and not making ourselves feel so bad that we have guilt (Which, to be honest, is one of my BIGGEST food triggers. Guilt over my own food choices) because that leads to self-hate which leads to sabotaging.

Edited July 20, 2017 by LittleLizzieLilliput

[Apple1 2,572]

I certainly wasn't guilt shaming anyone . My point was that we can't continue eating junk and expect to be successful long term. The link that was posted was good reading and great advice for all of us.

[kathyatcare 2]

Its hard at times. I have a problem snacking at night. Im working on it. Be patient with yourself

Sent from my LGMP260 using BariatricPal mobile app

[Newme17 3,444]

On 7/15/2017 at 8:20 AM, gwbicster said:

Oh and by the way, I greatly appreciate the love and sensitivity in your comments. Even when you disagree with posters you always do so in a positive and affectionate manner that is not at all disconcerting

I wholeheartedly agree about @Apple1 she's just so sweet and awesome! 😊

[LittleLizzieLilliput 919]

32 minutes ago, Apple1 said:

I certainly wasn't guilt shaming anyone . My point was that we can't continue eating junk and expect to be successful long term. The link that was posted was good reading and great advice for all of us.

I think it sounds like you are extrapolating that the OP only eats junk or has continuously binged on junk food. The OP stated this was a highly abnormal day. It is highly unhealthy to expect to never eat any junk food again. You (the plural You not you-you) are setting yourself up to fail.

I say that as a person who lost and maintained that loss of 120 lbs. Unfortunately I was still obese and had to do more but I did 16 months on a full liquid diet and then went off that and maintained without gaining for 3 years until I had my medical crisis that kicked off the bariatric surgery.

One of the things I learned quickly was that totally denying yourself and punishing yourself when you've made a mistake is actually the quickest way back to our old habits.

Edited July 20, 2017 by LittleLizzieLilliput

[Newme17 3,444]

On 7/15/2017 at 8:43 AM, Berry78 said:

visited Mackinac Island this summer. So I ate fudge. It wasn't even very good.. but I was on Mackinac, and that's what you DO!

Oh my! You just took me back 28 years when I lived in the U.P.!!! Fudge and Mackinac Island....vaguely remember the actual trip but I remember something to do with fudge and that name! 😊

[Newme17 3,444]

On 7/15/2017 at 9:20 AM, Berry78 said:

I love Dr. Weiner, haven't gone back to watch his videos postop.. (need to).. but I also have the concern about Protein. The best vegetable sources are Beans and seeds/nuts. It takes about 4oz of Beans to get 7g of Protein, and 1oz of nuts to get 7g protein. (Give or take a gram, depending on type). We would have to eat 4oz of nuts plus 16oz beans to meet our minimum requirements. (That would be all I could eat in a day, spread out among 8 "meals") There wouldn't be a leafy vegetable in sight.

But, if you replace 16oz beans with 4oz fish or meat, then suddenly things become much easier. Keep 1oz nuts, and replace the other 3 with egg, dairy, and beans.. now we're getting a nice round diet that still has room for fruits and veggies.

I am plant based but have to sub a Protein Drink in daily (per nut). I also have decided to keep eggs and cheese until I reach maintenance as well, or maybe forever? But yeah, it's much harder to get your protein in with little to no meat. But I feel good, my plumbing is pretty regular and no longer bloated these days. Oh, can't even tell when the last time I got sick either. It's been great!

[Apple1 2,572]

59 minutes ago, LittleLizzieLilliput said:

I think it sounds like you are extrapolating that the OP only eats junk or has continuously binged on junk food. The OP stated this was a highly abnormal day. It is highly unhealthy to expect to never eat any junk food again. You (the plural You not you-you) are setting yourself up to fail.

I say that as a person who lost and maintained that loss of 120 lbs. Unfortunately I was still obese and had to do more but I did 16 months on a full liquid diet and then went off that and maintained without gaining for 3 years until I had my medical crisis that kicked off the bariatric surgery.

One of the things I learned quickly was that totally denying yourself and punishing yourself when you've made a mistake is actually the quickest way back to our old habits.

I never extrapolated anything. I commented based on the information in the original post. I was simply wanting to offer a caution to the OP. She replied with more information and said she was fine case closed. I don't think my post was out of line at all. It isn't about making someone feel guilty, but offering honest advice while also not just saying hey don't worry it is ok to go ahead and eat a couple of donuts if you want as long as you feel ok about it.

Did you read the link Greensleevie posted? I have heard very similar advice from veterans and great doctors alike. We can't keep eating junk and expect to be successful long term. A treat once in awhile sure, we are all human. Will we make mistakes? You betcha, but I would hope my support system of friend here would speak up and tell it to me straight especially if I posted about it.

I always try to be respectful in any post I make or advice I give, but it doesn't even matter because giving advice gets you called an idiot around here.

[BigViffer 3,545]

I always try to be respectful in any post I make or advice I give, but it doesn't even matter because giving advice gets you called an idiot around here.

This is exactly what I was talking about in another thread. People don't want advice. They want want validation and "there, there" 's.

Sent from my phone. Please forgive brevity and spelling.

[LittleLizzieLilliput 919]

31 minutes ago, Apple1 said:

I never extrapolated anything. I commented based on the information in the original post. I was simply wanting to offer a caution to the OP. She replied with more information and said she was fine case closed. I don't think my post was out of line at all. It isn't about making someone feel guilty, but offering honest advice while also not just saying hey don't worry it is ok to go ahead and eat a couple of donuts if you want as long as you feel ok about it.

Did you read the link Greensleevie posted? I have heard very similar advice from veterans and great doctors alike. We can't keep eating junk and expect to be successful long term. A treat once in awhile sure, we are all human. Will we make mistakes? You betcha, but I would hope my support system of friend here would speak up and tell it to me straight especially if I posted about it.

I always try to be respectful in any post I make or advice I give, but it doesn't even matter because giving advice gets you called an idiot around here.

Oh god!! DId I call you an idiot?? OMG!! If I did I am so sorry!! Holy ****, that was so rude of me and I'm sorry, I'll go delete that if I did. Damn!

I don't think you are an idiot at all, I was just debating. I don't do personal attacks, this is all about helping and encouraging. I'm so sorry I've made you feel attacked!!!!!!!

Edit: lol! Ok, obviously you were talking about someone else calling you an idiot. WHich is so f**king rude for someone to do I can't believe it! But I'm glad I didn't call you an idiot. Please know that I don't want you feeling bad, I was just debating on the topic. I think folks are way too rough on the posters that express any kind of lapse. Having watched people in my group fail over and over due to self-guilt, self-hate, etc., I get worried for OP's when they are piled on with people condemning them and telling them that is the road to failure. I always try to encourage with positivity not with fear and doom.

Edited July 21, 2017 by LittleLizzieLilliput

[Apple1 2,572]

13 minutes ago, LittleLizzieLilliput said:

Oh god!! DId I call you an idiot?? OMG!! If I did I am so sorry!! Holy ****, that was so rude of me and I'm sorry, I'll go delete that if I did. Damn!

I don't think you are an idiot at all, I was just debating. I don't do personal attacks, this is all about helping and encouraging. I'm so sorry I've made you feel attacked!!!!!!!

No it wasn't you. Someone else on this thread said don't listen to all the idiots giving advice about what not to eat. It's ok though. I have tough skin. I just brought it up to make a point.

[LittleLizzieLilliput 919]

Just now, Apple1 said:

No it wasn't you. Someone else on this thread said don't listen to all the idiots giving advice about what not to eat. It's ok though. I have tough skin. I just brought it up to make a point.

Ok, just wanted to make sure, the way you said it made it sound like I called you an idiot. lol! I like to reserve that name for me. hahahah!!!!!!

[Apple1 2,572]

29 minutes ago, BigViffer said:

This is exactly what I was talking about in another thread. People don't want advice. They want want validation and "there, there" 's.

Sent from my phone. Please forgive brevity and spelling.

Ok, point taken.

[LaLaJ13 24]

I'm 9 months deep into this and I've allowed myself a donut now and then, some ICE CREAM!! lol! Yes, Ice Cream. And other treats. But I can only eat such small quantities at a time it's almost irrelevant. I get Dumping Syndrome so I keep my sugar intake very low. Even when I indulge.

I reject ANY notion or thought process that doesn't allow for us to live our lives to fullest and enjoy treats from time to time. I had this surgery so I could go back living my life, not so I continued to live in chains.

This is exactly how I feel! I had already changed my relationship with food and I'm good with it. I understand that certain foods are a gateway to old eating habits but it depends on the person and how strong your will is. Having this surgery has been the best tool for me. I taste or eat things that I probably shouldn't but it is not everyday and it is in moderation. I can't eat that much anyway! I want to live!

[LaLaJ13 24]

I agree a treat once in a while is not going to hurt anyone, but the OP said she ate 2 donuts. In my mind that is way more than a treat. Honestly most people of a healthy weight don't pig out on sweets that is why they are a healthy weight. The further out you get from surgery the more you will be able to eat so I am guarding against getting back into the habits that got me overweight in the first place.
I intend to live my life to the fullest also and the only way that is going to happen is if I maintain a healthy sustainable diet and exercise program. I am happy that you are able to indulge and keep losing weight that is great.
I feel better than I have in 10 years so I will keep doing what works for me. There are no chains on me and never will be. We all make our own decisions everyday.

I do not indulge in treats regularly. I may taste certain foods to see if my stomach will accept it and that's it. I did say that I ate two doughnuts that day, and it was only two doughnuts not a dozen. Along with my regular diet and my exercise regime, I am fine! I continue to lose weight and move forward. This may be very hard for some but it is not for me. I had a day of eating something that is not on the healthy list but I survived! Since that day I have had not urges for anything high in carbs. Half the time I don't even want to eat but I do and I keep it simple with Protein Drinks, veggies, Protein, salad and fruit. I am happier than I've ever been and I feel great! Being down 101lbs will do that to you. We are all doing fabulous! Look how far we've come.