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Feeling paranoid about feeling hungry
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Today I am 6 days post-op. For the previous 5 days I haven't had any real desire to eat or drink anything. No real appeal in eating, and in some cases, thinking about foods made me feel a little queasy. Today - I feel hungry. I had a 5.3oz yogurt for breakfast (took about 90 minutes to eat, I think from about 7:30 to 9am). It is not just after 10:30 and my tummy and mouth say "eat!" Logically, I know that I have only consumed 120 calories today and I need to continue to eat and sip small amounts to heal but a part of me is thinking "This is how it starts all over again. You're hungry all the time. You won't stop eating. You'll gain every ounce back and THIS WAS FOR NOTHING." This paranoia is compounded by the fact that I had, what I believe, was my first case of extremely mild dumping syndrome. I had been having trouble finding any drinks appealing and thought a very watered down bit of pineapple juice would do the trick - I was right. I had about 1/2 cup pineapple juice to 2 cups water over the course of a few hours. FOr those who don't know, a serving of pineapple juice can exceed 30 grams of sugar. I expect I may have had about 10. I've now become obsessed with the idea that my pineapple juice has reawakened the sugar demon and all is lost. I know that sounds incredibly dramatic, but I've noticed over the last few days that these kinds of fears keep sprouting up.
I can't shake this fear that this isn't a fresh start, just a pit stop on the same ol', same ol. Ugh. Anyone else dealing with similar feelings? How did you cope?