Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Husband says he doesn't like skinny women...WTH!



Recommended Posts

Well , to update everyone. I am totally shocked that my hubby did a 360. He said that he was really impressed with how I look so far and he is excited to see end result. I have lost total 44 lbs so my body has really changed and he can't keep his hands off me. I told him that he is very superficial but he insists that he used to tell me how pretty I was at my heaviest as well ( yeah like twice a month compared to like 4 times a day since I lost all of this weight). I try not to focus on that too much due to I have so much going on . But it's bittersweet to me, sounds crazy but it is because I feel like oh now you find me irresistible but before , what was I ? Oh well... this is my year to focus on Diana and that's what I'm doing.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Well , to update everyone. I am totally shocked that my hubby did a 360. He said that he was really impressed with how I look so far and he is excited to see end result. I have lost total 44 lbs so my body has really changed and he can't keep his hands off me. I told him that he is very superficial but he insists that he used to tell me how pretty I was at my heaviest as well ( yeah like twice a month compared to like 4 times a day since I lost all of this weight). I try not to focus on that too much due to I have so much going on . But it's bittersweet to me, sounds crazy but it is because I feel like oh now you find me irresistible but before , what was I ? Oh well... this is my year to focus on Diana and that's what I'm doing.

Sounds like he was just feeling a bit insecure and maybe he was also just worried about the surgical procedure involved. My husband wasn't on the boat at first and told me it was too extreme and dangerous and you and I had similar starting stats. Have you actually lost 44 lbs since surgery in December or does that include pre op? If it was in less than a month I am jealous, lol. I think that due to shows like my 600 lb life a lot of people feel that weight loss surgery is only an option for extreme cases. I was self pay so I felt that I needed my husband to be 100% on board. After some research he agreed but would've had no problem if I'd changed my mind. I told him once we made the decision that I didn't want to hear a single comment from now on unless it was supportive. I knew that there would be moments post op when I'd be wishing I hadn't done it and I'd need his support and not an "I told you so".

He blew me away with how much support he gave me and how caring he was during my recovery. Sometimes men are just resistant to change, lol.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You are so right. Oh and I lost 44 lbs total including pre op. I have lost 22 lbs since dec 5 surgery date. At 3 weeks my weight just halted but I'm not worried and def don't compare my success to my 600 lb life because they lose like 70 lbs in 2 months because their Bmi's are so high. So , we may lose a little slower but we are losing which is important.

Well , to update everyone. I am totally shocked that my hubby did a 360. He said that he was really impressed with how I look so far and he is excited to see end result. I have lost total 44 lbs so my body has really changed and he can't keep his hands off me. I told him that he is very superficial but he insists that he used to tell me how pretty I was at my heaviest as well ( yeah like twice a month compared to like 4 times a day since I lost all of this weight). I try not to focus on that too much due to I have so much going on . But it's bittersweet to me, sounds crazy but it is because I feel like oh now you find me irresistible but before , what was I ? Oh well... this is my year to focus on Diana and that's what I'm doing.

Sounds like he was just feeling a bit insecure and maybe he was also just worried about the surgical procedure involved. My husband wasn't on the boat at first and told me it was too extreme and dangerous and you and I had similar starting stats. Have you actually lost 44 lbs since surgery in December or does that include pre op? If it was in less than a month I am jealous, lol. I think that due to shows like my 600 lb life a lot of people feel that weight loss surgery is only an option for extreme cases. I was self pay so I felt that I needed my husband to be 100% on board. After some research he agreed but would've had no problem if I'd changed my mind. I told him once we made the decision that I didn't want to hear a single comment from now on unless it was supportive. I knew that there would be moments post op when I'd be wishing I hadn't done it and I'd need his support and not an "I told you so".

He blew me away with how much support he gave me and how caring he was during my recovery. Sometimes men are just resistant to change, lol.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Well , to update everyone. I am totally shocked that my hubby did a 360. He said that he was really impressed with how I look so far and he is excited to see end result. I have lost total 44 lbs so my body has really changed and he can't keep his hands off me. I told him that he is very superficial but he insists that he used to tell me how pretty I was at my heaviest as well ( yeah like twice a month compared to like 4 times a day since I lost all of this weight). I try not to focus on that too much due to I have so much going on . But it's bittersweet to me, sounds crazy but it is because I feel like oh now you find me irresistible but before , what was I ? Oh well... this is my year to focus on Diana and that's what I'm doing.

Congrats your weight loss is amazing!! So super happy for you!! I'm hoping your husband is still being supportive and that you are feeling better about his new found interest. It could be a good thing? Take care!!

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi everyone,my surgery was on 9/24/2014
Sw 248, I got down to 161 within 9 months and by the following year I was back to 181.Cw 208.My husband was not supportive at all he would call me names and say I was too skinny.Well I am divorced as of 9/2018 and Extremely happy with the choice I made.Even though I gained weight back I lost a lot of heavy baggage and gained my confidence back.I go back to my Dr on the 15th to see about a revision.Prayerfully I can get it done.I found out later that he was jealous of my results and the attention I was receiving.He would sabotage my eating habits buying lots of Snacks and killing my self esteem.He would say turn the light switch off in other words stop loosing weight so fast it’s just like turning a switch.Killing all my friendships.I am glad to say I am currently a Life Coach and helping people get through tough times.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

How about sitting down and talking to him about this rather than a bunch of strangers? I’d tell him why you want to have the surgery and why it is important to you. Then I would hear his concerns and see if they are really as superficial as they may outwardly appear or if there is something else.

Don’t listen to the people here that instantly tell everyone to leave their spouse the minute they are unsupportive. You have been with him for 21 years. I think before I threw a relationship like that away I’d sit down and try to work it out first.

I’d make sure he knew how he makes you feel when he says unsupportive things and that you’d appreciate support on your journey. Give him a chance to do better and if he has legitimate concerns like complications from surgery then take him to your consults and let him talk to the surgeon and even post a thread on here where he can ask questions using your account. We’d be happy to answer anything he has.

But don’t listen to a bunch of people that have nothing invested in your relationship and immediately say leave him. That is ridiculous and they have no skin in the game.

Try to work it out. Like adults.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I mean exactly what I said. The most important people in this situation are the husband and wife. A bunch of internet strangers shouldn’t even be in the equation. I’d never seek the counsel of an Internet forum when it comes to my marriage and I would hope my wife wouldn’t either. Then again, when things irritate us we talk about it and resolve it. Because the only people that can fix a problem in any relationship are the people involved.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

How about sitting down and talking to him about this rather than a bunch of strangers? I’d tell him why you want to have the surgery and why it is important to you. Then I would hear his concerns and see if they are really as superficial as they may outwardly appear or if there is something else.

Don’t listen to the people here that instantly tell everyone to leave their spouse the minute they are unsupportive. You have been with him for 21 years. I think before I threw a relationship like that away I’d sit down and try to work it out first.

I’d make sure he knew how he makes you feel when he says unsupportive things and that you’d appreciate support on your journey. Give him a chance to do better and if he has legitimate concerns like complications from surgery then take him to your consults and let him talk to the surgeon and even post a thread on here where he can ask questions using your account. We’d be happy to answer anything he has.

But don’t listen to a bunch of people that have nothing invested in your relationship and immediately say leave him. That is ridiculous and they have no skin in the game.

Try to work it out. Like adults.
As someone who nearly lost the of their life do to lack of communication and taking bad advice from outside people miserable in their own love lives, talk to YOUR man. TALK to HIM. If need be seek professional help. Youre paying someone to operate on your body. Pay someone to operate on your marriage. Don't trow it all away until there truly is no hope. You what you need to do Sis. You've got this!

Sent from my SM-N950U using BariatricPal mobile app

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

How about sitting down and talking to him about this rather than a bunch of strangers? I’d tell him why you want to have the surgery and why it is important to you. Then I would hear his concerns and see if they are really as superficial as they may outwardly appear or if there is something else.

Don’t listen to the people here that instantly tell everyone to leave their spouse the minute they are unsupportive. You have been with him for 21 years. I think before I threw a relationship like that away I’d sit down and try to work it out first.

I’d make sure he knew how he makes you feel when he says unsupportive things and that you’d appreciate support on your journey. Give him a chance to do better and if he has legitimate concerns like complications from surgery then take him to your consults and let him talk to the surgeon and even post a thread on here where he can ask questions using your account. We’d be happy to answer anything he has.

But don’t listen to a bunch of people that have nothing invested in your relationship and immediately say leave him. That is ridiculous and they have no skin in the game.

Try to work it out. Like adults.
As someone who nearly lost the of their life do to lack of communication and taking bad advice from outside people miserable in their own love lives, talk to YOUR man. TALK to HIM. If need be seek professional help. Youre paying someone to operate on your body. Pay someone to operate on your marriage. Don't trow it all away until there truly is no hope. You what you need to do Sis. You've got this!

Sent from my SM-N950U using BariatricPal mobile app


Well ****! I guess you knew what needed to done and did it! [emoji23]

Sent from my SM-N950U using BariatricPal mobile app

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Glad your surgery went well! It is difficult to navigate this journey and the impacts it has on our relationships. My husband has been fairly supportive, but there have certainly been times when I’ve had to put my foot down and prioritize my needs (usually my insistence we cook and eat at home versus him wanting to eat out or order takeout). It’s weird how much food and weight can impact a relationship, especially if one half is adopting a lifestyle they didn’t have going into the marriage. However, we are managing... but sometimes managing means I’ve got worry about doing me and he’s gotta worry about doing him and we’ve just gotta trust that being happy individually will make us a stronger team overall.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×