Once was judgmental...

[Malin 470]

I can't say this is my 'surgery story' as I have not had my surgery yet, however this is my story.

Whenever someone told me they were having weight loss surgery done, I felt compelled to talk them out of it. I felt it was my duty to do so. See, my father died after having a gastric bypass in 1982. He was only 31. He had broken his arm after a fall at work, and he was told he needed to lose weight to prevent another accident. Given the devastating impact his death had on our lives, I felt I had a righteous mandate to preach the dangers of weight loss surgery. DOOM. DISASTER. DEATH. Yeah, needless to say I was judgmental and unsupportive to people I knew who sought this treatment.

As an interesting turn of events, my mother--the woman who lost her husband in 1982, underwent a gastric sleeve a few years ago. The night before her surgery I let her have it. Blamed this on her trying to impress her boyfriend. Gave her a guilt trip--heck, I gave her the guilt all-inclusive grand tour.

But, oh, how I was wrong!

The first time my children saw her after the surgery (a few months later), they did not recognize their own grandmother. I hardly did. Her sleep apnea (her snoring was the stuff of legend) is practically gone. She more active in her 60s than she ever was when we were growing up.

Now that my cholesterol, apnea, higher blood pressure and my weight are worsening, I have done more research, seen friends have remarkable success with this option and have decided this is an option for me.

And when I read some of the stories on this forum of family not being supportive, I wince. That was me.

Now I'm looking at the world with new eyes. I'm seeing how food regulates our lives, the worst of it is everywhere. Just this weekend it really hit home how long we have to sit through too many commercials for coke, popcorn and M & Ms at the movies. I'm seeing that obesity IS a disease, and I need a better weapon to fight it.

My surgery is in early December. I'm ready to get started. Here's to optimism, strength and tenacity to all!

[mrssoupmix 61]

@Malin: I did not have the same dramatic experience you did, but I have a sister, a cousin, an aunt, an uncle and a few coworkers who all had some form of weight loss surgery, most gaining at least a significant portion of their weight back. I was THAT nay sayer. "oh, you don't want to do that! The weight comes back! It is just a temporary and unrealistically drastic measure to do to yourself." etc...

Well after having a hysterectomy at 38 and shortly there after turning 40. I gained 10 pounds a year and started losing interest in the things I previously enjoyed: travel, biking, the beach, swimming. I was embarrased of my lack of self control and I no longer felt remotely attractive. I felt like a spectacle and eating out became very uncomfortable. I started researching the sleeve almost 3 years ago. For a short time considered Lap Band. It took me 2 1/2 years to make up my mind. And when I did, I was all in. I had my surgery 6 weeks ago. I am down 38 pounds. And feel better in my own skin already. I am more confident and comfortable and looking forward to an upcoming family vacation- like I haven't in years. And that is after only SIX WEEKS! I feel like I have been given a second chance to live my life as an active, healthy adult. I have genetically high cholesterol, fatty liver disease, back pain, GERD, and have struggled with Plantar Fasciitis. My PF is gone, no more heartburn, back and hip pain diminished, and I look forward to my next blood test to see where my cholesterol and liver enzymes are. The procedures have come a long way. I am so happy for you. December is right around the corner. The holiday happenings will be tough, but it is so do able and you will not be hungry so it will be easier than you think. Good luck!

[QueenOfTheTamazons 634]

My great aunt is a diabetic nurse. She had gastric bypass 30 years ago. She ended up with every known side effect and major issues that included having medically procribed liquid diet fed directly into her stomach thru a port in her side.... but she still recommends the surgery.

She lost almost all of ber excess weight and kept more than 60% of the weight off over these 3 decades and aknowledges that she is a "one off" and most people dont have the same issues.

HW 385 SW 359 CW 335 (50lbs down!) Sleeved 10/5/16

[Malin 470]

@Malin: I did not have the same dramatic experience you did, but I have a sister, a cousin, an aunt, an uncle and a few coworkers who all had some form of weight loss surgery, most gaining at least a significant portion of their weight back. I was THAT nay sayer. "oh, you don't want to do that! The weight comes back! It is just a temporary and unrealistically drastic measure to do to yourself." etc...

Well after having a hysterectomy at 38 and shortly there after turning 40. I gained 10 pounds a year and started losing interest in the things I previously enjoyed: travel, biking, the beach, swimming. I was embarrased of my lack of self control and I no longer felt remotely attractive. I felt like a spectacle and eating out became very uncomfortable. I started researching the sleeve almost 3 years ago. For a short time considered Lap Band. It took me 2 1/2 years to make up my mind. And when I did, I was all in. I had my surgery 6 weeks ago. I am down 38 pounds. And feel better in my own skin already. I am more confident and comfortable and looking forward to an upcoming family vacation- like I haven't in years. And that is after only SIX WEEKS! I feel like I have been given a second chance to live my life as an active, healthy adult. I have genetically high cholesterol, fatty liver disease, back pain, GERD, and have struggled with Plantar Fasciitis. My PF is gone, no more heartburn, back and hip pain diminished, and I look forward to my next blood test to see where my cholesterol and liver enzymes are. The procedures have come a long way. I am so happy for you. December is right around the corner. The holiday happenings will be tough, but it is so do able and you will not be hungry so it will be easier than you think. Good luck!

I can relate to everything you're saying here @mrssoupmix my cholesterol issues are also genetic (not to mention the obesity). I developed Plantar Fascitis in the Army, and with the weight gain I've become queen of the frumpy shoes. And I completely agree--the procedures have come a long way. That's the first thing the surgeon told me after I shared the story of my father. I feel like this surgery isn't just about the weight, it's about EVERYTHING--the apnea, cholesterol, arthritis, PF, you name it. Thanks for sharing!

[Malin 470]

My great aunt is a diabetic nurse. She had gastric bypass 30 years ago. She ended up with every known side effect and major issues that included having medically procribed liquid diet fed directly into her stomach thru a port in her side.... but she still recommends the surgery.

She lost almost all of ber excess weight and kept more than 60% of the weight off over these 3 decades and aknowledges that she is a "one off" and most people dont have the same issues.

HW 385 SW 359 CW 335 (50lbs down!) Sleeved 10/5/16

She was brave to try that back in the day. I am fairly certain that the surgeon who did my father's surgery wasn't an expert at it. I know my mom pursued malpractice case against the surgeon. The procedures have come a long way since then. And it's a testimony to the positive affect the surgery can be that she still recommends it after all she went through. In a way, I feel I have an advantage going into this surgery because I have a healthy respect/fear of the importance of following the diet and what can go wrong. Thanks for sharing your aunt's story.

[sc101071 398]

My mom died 8 years ago at age 57. Her organs were damaged from untreated sleep apnea and diabetes. It's one of the main reasons I jumped when I got coverage for the surgery. I want to see grandkids. Glad that you came around. Best of luck with your journey.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

[LittleBill 2,231]

It took me a long time to come to the point where I was willing to have this surgery. We (my wife and I) had two friends die from it years ago. But we got past that, and I did it a little more than a month ago. Most of my family and friends have been very supportive. My biggest detractor has been one of my best friends. He had the very same surgery about four years ago, but he did no prep, nor does he follow his instructions for diet. He has gained back 80 lbs of what he lost, and is very bitter about it.

Good luck with your own surgery. I hope you have a great outcome!

[livvsmum 2,370]

What an amazing story! I think your response was totally understandable given your loss. I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my father as well and it is life-changing. I'm so glad that your mother had such a positive experience and I'm so hopeful for you as well. This will be an amazing new chapter in your story. It's great that you are so thoughtful about the impact and control of food on our lives. I think that shows that you are mentally and emotionally preparing. Good luck to you!

[Sai 785]

*hugs* Thank you for sharing it. Great great post.