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The Losing Battle



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After a few years I'm back on here after being at what seems like my wits end. I had the surgery in October of 2013 and had gotten myself down to 279 (90 pounds lost). Since getting a new boss last year, planning a wedding, and getting married I have gotten back up to 310.

I know the reasons why. I started eating Snacks after dinner again, drinking a lot more wine, and eating full plates of food. I cannot eat full plates in one sitting. I can take two bites and then am stuffed. Now, however, I wait it out until those two bites go down and eat two more, then two more, and so on.

I need help. Advice. Anything. Stress eating help?

I exercise 30 min/3x per week (cardio).

I see a brand new lap band doctor on Thursday as my old surgeon moved out of state. Interested to see what he says....

- Nicole

You guys know im really all about being positive and encouraging.... but im going to Playing the Devils advocate here..... and how is this the bands fault? You admitted that: You are not eating correctly and are eating around the band. They way i stop over eating... I stop eating... fix what you know you should eat and eat ONLY that. Step away from the table and go do something else... Go walk, go read, go clean, go play with kids... Another way i don't eat the bad stuff... I Don't buy it. (except Mt. Dew, you all know how i feel about that, ill shank a bi*ch that comes between me and the Dew)... But, When i do have a craving, I go do something to get my mind off of it.... if that doesn't work...i get the smallest size, eat a bite or two and throw the rest away.. in the trash and pour something on top.

Your exercising 30min for 3 days a week..... Girl, that is no where near enough. If your really serious about losing weight you have to do more.... I know... there are some people that lost a sh*t ton of weight and never exercised...but, look at where most of them are now... back up in weight for the same reason as you... eating more and moving less..... You have to reverse that and eat less and move more...

I don't see how a new WLS is going to cure your problem... My sister in law has had two LB's and GB and is managing to put the weight back on.... Why, she never got a grip on the underlying issues on WHY she over eats and until you do as well.... NO WLS is going to work...... plus she never exercised. My friend Tami... GS lost over 100 never exercised... gaining back.... my friend Jenny had GB... Gaining it back, never exercised... I see a pattern with all WLS.. if you count on the Surgery to do ALL the work, it won't work in the long run.

Were you completely honest with your new dr. that he would suggest GB? doesn't he realize... it's not the surgery's fault.

When i started gaining back... i, like you realized what i was doing and stopped do it... got back on the exercise train and lost the 20 i gained and lost the last bit to reach my 100lbs lost mark.... It can be done... you just have to want it bad enough. The biggest step is .... You know what your doing wrong... and only YOU can change it.... Not the dr and not a different WLS

You CAN do this.... you CAN... just have to put your mind to it... Im cheering for you.... because i KNOW YOU CAN....Never..GIVE UP ON YOU!!! Your worth every effort... When the devil hands you lemons... squeeze it in that Bast*rds eyes.. and runnnn

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I appreciate your honesty. I need more people like you in my life! lol

I was completely honest with my new Dr. and he still recommended a revision. I'm the one who told him I wanted to investigate the reasons behind it. I went to a psychologist last month and DID NOT like her at all. She recommending joining a weight loss support group for bandsters a year out and up. I've signed up for that.

I'm wondering if I should join weight watchers just to physically go to the meetings. When I used to visit my lap band dr. once a month for check ins that motivated me to lose because I knew he would say something if I didn't. With my new dr. and HSA insturance I CANNOT afford to go once a month anymore. My last visit to him cost me $350!!! Just to touch my stomach and refuse to do a fill/withdraw.

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I'm so glad your not offended by my honesty.... some do. Im glad you told your doctor everything.... Im with you on the accountability. and i think WW could def help you keep on track.

I really think if you start moving more... and eating less you will see the difference. I would give it a try... what do you have to lose except more weight... right?

Get serious about taking your life back.... i did, that's why im getting divorced. Life is too short to be unhappy and i can tell this weight is making you unhappy and you are falling into the stress/depressed eating pattern.

You didn't like that PHY.... go see another one and another one till you find someone you like and feel comfortable with... someone that won't baby you, someone that will tell you what you NEED to hear and not what you WANT to hear

You did it once.... I know you can do it again... YOU just have to believe in yourself.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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