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Does anyone have any suggestions about should or should I not tell my friends and family about getting banded. I work in a beauty salon and I am not sure if i should tell until long after i have surgery. I am afraid my friends and coworkers will try to talk me out of surgery. Marcy:)

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I made the mistake of telling everyone in my family. I am retired, so do not have to worry about co-workers; just family. My sisters-in law are so "into my business", I should have know better. I finally fired off an email to them . They kept asking: "What is she eating", "How much", "you mean she had a spoon of Jello and a drop of broth and she is full". And the kicker, "how much does she want to loose". I told them, they would know when they see it with their very own eyes.

So my advise; the less that know, the better. Good luck on your surgery.

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Marcy,

Trust me, you're damned if you do and damned if you don't! I decided to keep it quiet but shared it with my sister in law and specifically asked her not to share it with anyone. Well, at Thanksgiving, after a few drinks and too many compliments to me about my weight loss and blurted out to the 17 friends and relatives that I had gotten the lapband in June. It was pretty humiliating, but I apologized and told everyone that I didn't want to say anything until I knew how it would go. I also told everyone that I had asked her not to say anything! (Maybe they got the hint not to share anything with her that they wanted to stay private!). Anyway, I found out from other relatives that she had promptly told them when I first got it done! Oh well, now I know whom I can and can't trust!

I guess my point is...make a decision and stick with it. Tell everyone or no one, because there is always that one person who will blab when you least expect it! Good luck!

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In June I told my best friend of 11 years I was thinking of having it done. Only thing scheduled was the seminar at the end of June. Did not even have insurance approval. She was to come with me to the seminar, but she never showed "had to work late". Talked to her two days later and she has not returned any calls. That was June 28.

Guess she was never really my friend.

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Hi Marcy,

I also did not tell too many people, just a few close friends and family. I wanted to see how it went and did not want to feel like I was being watched and judged if it did not work out.

Everyone has been great!

A friend did make a comment yesterday..I am down close to losing 50 lbs...I don't think she knows how much I really need to lose..anyway..I was having a day where I just had no appetite and just munched on a few things. She just blurted out "with that tiny bit of food you are able to eat now, I'm surprised you have not lost more weight"....that was odd. Oh well.

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Well, I sent an email to my big mouth sister in law that I would share information on an as need to know basis. Then she told my husband(her brother) that she is afraid of talking to me for fear of hurting my feelins. Well, she has never worried about that before!!!

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Only my husband and mother know about me. Don't care for anyone else to know my business. At first it was because I thought I was taking the easy way out with the band. Little did I know it is not the easy way out. But I at this point I plan to take it to my grave. I do not think it is anyones business to know and I certainly do not want anyone tracking my progress and watching what I eat, making comments, etc.

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I am seeking some help on the friends and family matter. I have the support of my mom and sister (only people in my family who know), and my very close friends that have known me for a long time are really really excited for me. So, I am very lucky. But, I am dating a guy, I have been seeing for a year, and he is VERY against the surgery all together. He feels I need to go on another program, get a trainer, etc. That surgery is just too extreme. My reply is that:

1. I have done those things

2. During the course of him knowing me, I was still dealing with pneumonia, and my lungs are still healing even now.

3. Generally going on some sort of weight loss program involves putting some sort of chemical into your body that is more dangerous then surgery itself.

4. This is something I have thought about a very long time, and that I want to do this for so many reasons; health, longevity of life, and many more. For me this is right.

What I do not know is how to gain his support. Maybe someone can provide some insight?????

Michele:faint:

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You might try telling him you have to do it for health reasons. It's the truth.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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