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@@katie09/21/2016 - I would have done the EXACT same thing! You don't owe anyone details from your personal life, particularly not people whom you don't expect have your best interest at heart. Do what you need to do to protect yourself from negativity - if you're anything like me, I have enough negativity of my own to battle without absorbing any from others. More importantly, it looks like your surgery is coming up in a few days - best of luck for an easy surgery and a quick recovery!

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@@blizair09 - it seems that we not only have the same surgery day (+\- one day) but also the same airline / lounge loyalty! I admire your ability to be so open about your journey - I guess that I am just more of a private person. Your support network sounds fantastic. Best of luck with your surgery next week!

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@@Nerdgrl

It's great to "meet" another Delta person! Because I'm going to be on leave for six weeks after the surgery, I probably won't make Diamond for next year. I hit the 2017 platinum mark last week, and I'll have about 4 good weeks of travel once I come back to work, so if I get close enough, can find a decent fare, and physically feel like doing it, I might do a mileage run to put me over the top. Being Diamond is addictive, and I would definitely miss it!

All my best for your upcoming surgery. I am scared to death, but I take a lot of solace in the fact that I have put myself in the best position for it. (And the fact that my mom and dad are coming for 2 weeks to be with my partner and me throughout the whole thing makes it a lot better, too!)

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Pre-surgery, I didn't really feel comfortable telling anyone outside of family or close friends. However, as the weight started to come off, many of my coworkers asked my secret...and the fact that my diet was so restricted coupled with the weight loss tipped them off. I never had any negative reactions, and most people commented how courageous it was for me to have taken action to improve my health!

In May, I relocated to the United Kingdom from Florida because I got married on 20 August. The close friends I had here in the UK were all aware of my surgery and very supportive, but since I have been here, I've obviously met many new people and forged new friendships and professional relationships. These new people in my life don't know me as "Obese Polara," they see me as I am now. My surgery was 9 December 2015, and at over 9 months out, my diet is more varied than it was immediately post-op (kind of a no-brainer statement, lol!). However, I still follow the dietary guidelines given to me by my surgeon, nurse practitioner, and NUT to the letter. The restrictive nature of the surgery coupled with the changes to my mental relationship with food means that I'll always opt for Protein, veg, and fruits over anything else (I have no desire to eat bread, Pasta, etc.), but everyone simply assumes that I am very health-conscious (which is actually the truth and 100% spot-on) and not a huge eater.

I am not ashamed of the fact that I was sleeved and I will open up to people about it if I feel the circumstances warrant it. In fact, because I was open with my best friend about having the procedure, she felt confident enough to start the process herself. She's having the surgery this coming weekend in the Czech Republic, and I am actually very humbled that she asked me to accompany her as her support person, so we will be flying out together Sunday!

I guess that the point of this ramble is that who you choose to tell or not tell is your business, but you'd be surprised how understanding many people can be. Of course, there are a lot of people out there who have negative opinions about bariatric surgery, but if you feel you can trust someone, letting them know can actually be cathartic. As time passes, you may feel more comfortable discussing it. Take it day by day and enjoy the journey. Lots and lots of good vibes your way!

Xx,

Polara

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@@Polara

Great post! It sounds like you are the PERFECT person to support your friend. Safe travels.

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@@blizair09

Thank you! It's not easy, but it's very worth it in the end...you got this! \o/

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@@katie09/21/2016 - I would have done the EXACT same thing! You don't owe anyone details from your personal life, particularly not people whom you don't expect have your best interest at heart. Do what you need to do to protect yourself from negativity - if you're anything like me, I have enough negativity of my own to battle without absorbing any from others. More importantly, it looks like your surgery is coming up in a few days - best of luck for an easy surgery and a quick recovery!

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Thank you :) and yes, I have enough negative battles going on - I don't need to invite more in! I guess lied in that moment to protect myself. Appreciate the support!

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I had a hiatal hernia repaired anyway during this surgery so that's what I told people. I am not ashamed as there is nothing to be ashamed of, but some people like to judge and at "only" 217 lbs lol, there are many who would tell me WLS was a ridiculous option.

So just do what makes things easier for you.

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I have been honest with everyone. I am so excited about my new journey and idc who likes it and who doesn't.

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Good for you!! Best wishes as you move forward with your journey.

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A LOT of people here ave hernias with surgery and my husband has had TWO since surgery. You are not lying. Don't let your guilt override your mouth because it is your business and no one else's. My husband refused to let me tell his 31 year old son. Or neighbors, or friends. No one is the wiser. We dieted, lost weight, TRUTH, and now we watch everything we eat. No one even questions our eating, and we go out a lot. Good luck, be strong!

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I tell everyone and anyone. I'm so excited for this new journey. I don't care if someone tells me it's not a good idea or that I'm not "fat enough" I am doing this for me and my life but I'm bursting at the seams for everyone to know I'm happy with my decision. I'm hoping to have my date set for the end of October beginning of November. My mom wants me to wait till my classes are done in December but I don't know if I can wait that long :)

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Love everyone's thoughts! I really hate to lie too, and feel like I should be brave and stand up for this option against this horrible beast that is obesity. But I'm just not there quite yet. Right now, I feel like people look at me and just see my weight. I can't get past the thought that if I loose weight with this method people will just look at me and see the surgery. I really shouldn't give a crap what others think. Obviously this is my life and I'm doing this to give me and my family a better quality of life. But that judgement is still in the back of my head. I admire you all!

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    • LeighaTR

      Four days post surgery. I am sipping as fast as I can and getting NO WHERE near the goal of 60 - 80 grams of protein or the 64 oz of liquids. I just feel FULL. I don't know if it can still be the gas build up (I would think by now that would be gone) but it is a struggle to drink. And so far I have not had the nausea or spasms and don't want to wander into that territory by pushing too hard with liquids. I about passed out today as it was my most "strenuous" day. Went from second story to basement for shower and I was sure I was going to pass out. Looking back on my last few days I have had a total of less than 1000 calories. Am I just not getting enough nourishment in me? Once again a friday where I can't get ahold of the doc until Monday rolls back around so I am hoping maybe someone here has some experience on how to keep energy going. I do have fibromyalgia too and that may be where some added fatigue comes into play. How did you all fair with the goals the week after surgery?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 3 replies
      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

      2. Selina333

        I'm in Houston so kind of near you and had the sleeve in Dec. Down 61 lbs. Feeling better. Was definitely worth it. I hope the everything is going well for you. Update us when you can!

      3. Doughgurl

        I am back home after my bypass surgery in Tiajuana. I'm post op day 4. Everything went great! I guess I'm one of the lucky ones who have not encountered much pain at all, no nausea thus far and I'm having no problem keeping down broths and water. Thank you for your well wishes. I cant wait to keep up this journey and have a chance at better health and simply better quality of life. I know there will be bumps in the road ahead, and everything won't be peaches and cream, but at least I have a great start so far. 😍

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

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