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Sex after surgery

Tami_Lynn

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Tami_Lynn    77

Tami_Lynn
Posted

Hello everyone... My question is geared towards the sleevers who are 60+ pounds down. Does sexual intercourse feel different with your new body? I remember the most mind blowing sex before I had kids and gained all this weight! Now was that because I was "average framed", ....... because I was young, ............or just pre-mommy perks?

Yes it's probably a frowned upon question I'm sure.... but how do ya know unless you ask!!

Thanks

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Dub    10,032

Dub
Posted

Not sure why it'd be frowned on around here.

It's a part of life and a damned important part, too.

Sex is much better now than before.

Now, I know that I broke the bed due to effort.......not due to weight.

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onedeterminedchick    118

onedeterminedchick
Posted

Not sure why it'd be frowned on around here.

It's a part of life and a damned important part, too.

Sex is much better now than before.

Now, I know that I broke the bed due to effort.......not due to weight.

@@Dub you are hilarious! So true....but I can't wait to get to that point in life again. Loving your responses on here

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laceemouse    631

laceemouse
Posted

Hello everyone... My question is geared towards the sleevers who are 60+ pounds down. Does sexual intercourse feel different with your new body? I remember the most mind blowing sex before I had kids and gained all this weight! Now was that because I was "average framed", ....... because I was young, ............or just pre-mommy perks?

Yes it's probably a frowned upon question I'm sure.... but how do ya know unless you ask!!

Thanks

Sent from my VS985 4G using the BariatricPal App

I don't think it's frowned upon, but I do think the answer would vary greatly from person to person. So many factors to consider, like relationship things and such.

Of course self esteem has a lot to do with satisfaction. While I look forward to losing weight I worry about the excess skin that comes with that. Not that my husband will care, nothing turns him off like ever. But I think about it.

Go on Youtube and you can watch lots of video blogs about weight loss (from surgery and otherwise) There are a couple (Clusie L is one of them) who discuss sex, relationships, etc after weight loss.

Again, this is a complex issue. I am pre-surgery anyway, hopefully others will chime in????

Dub always has great answers :)

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Candygyrl    637

Candygyrl
Posted

Hello everyone... My question is geared towards the sleevers who are 60+ pounds down. Does sexual intercourse feel different with your new body? I remember the most mind blowing sex before I had kids and gained all this weight! Now was that because I was "average framed", ....... because I was young, ............or just pre-mommy perks?

Yes it's probably a frowned upon question I'm sure.... but how do ya know unless you ask!!

Thanks

Sent from my VS985 4G using the BariatricPal App

I don't think it's frowned upon, but I do think the answer would vary greatly from person to person. So many factors to consider, like relationship things and such.

Of course self esteem has a lot to do with satisfaction. While I look forward to losing weight I worry about the excess skin that comes with that. Not that my husband will care, nothing turns him off like ever. But I think about it.

Go on Youtube and you can watch lots of video blogs about weight loss (from surgery and otherwise) There are a couple (Clusie L is one of them) who discuss sex, relationships, etc after weight loss.

Again, this is a complex issue. I am pre-surgery anyway, hopefully others will chime in????

Dub always has great answers :)

Clusie... I love her!

Oh and sex has gotten lots better. Not as much tummy in the way. Easier to switch positions and my legs don't hurt or get tired when I'm doing all the work.

But YES I love clusie.

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Christinamo7    4,042

Christinamo7
Posted

it's a whole lot more comfortable for both of us, and feels so much more intimate now that he's not balancing above my big old belly that is gone.

one of the main reasons I wanted to loose weight was to make some positions easier and better. no shame in that! didn't have any "problems" before but it's is a lot better now. quite happy. and for me, as I get older, know what I like more, and am generally happy, sex is a part of my life that goes from good to better to hello! it's only improving.

hope it's the same for you.

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tony031469    81

tony031469
Posted

I have more of a sexual appetite than I ever did before. Being on all the meds I was on made it worse. Now it's alot better and I'm enjoying my life alot more. Especially now that I'm single and dropped over 100 pounds. ????????????????????

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LipstickLady    25,682

LipstickLady
Posted

Nothing frowned upon here!

Sex is better because I feel better about me. I'm saggy and floppy and loose, but I have more energy than ever and am much more ... uhm ... BENDY.

Plus, when I'm playing cowgirl, I'm not afraid of squishing him. That's a bonus.

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LisaMergs    2,857

LisaMergs
Posted

I wanna break a bed!!!!

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myfatisnotaflaw    33

myfatisnotaflaw
Posted

I was too afraid to ask my doctor how long after surgery do I have to wait to have sex lol answers?

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laceemouse    631

laceemouse
Posted

I was too afraid to ask my doctor how long after surgery do I have to wait to have sex lol answers?

Sent from my SM-N930T using the BariatricPal App

My doctor included info about it in the handouts they gave me my first visit.

He says it's okay as soon as you get home, as long as you feel up to it :)

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jvleeuw    98

jvleeuw
Posted

Sex with my bride always is good. We both had the sleeve on the same day and waited about 10 days out before shook the house!! Yeah. It was good. It's all about making your partner feel beautiful at any weight.

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Go To Topic Listing POST-Operation Weight Loss Surgery Q&A

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    • Doughgurl

      Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 1 reply
      1. Phil Penn

        Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

    • LeighaTR

      LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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