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Any Separations/Divorce after the Band



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Hi Everyone,

I am officially separated, nothing to do with the band but I feel better about myself and felt like I could do better now that I am down about 79 pounds from my hightest weight and also my husband had this thing that he didnt want me to lose more and he kept telling me that I looked fine and I should'nt lose more because my face would look ugly. I think we should start a club for separated or divoced banded people, anyone interested????

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I really don't feel that my band had anything to do with it but I feel that as the weight comes off you notice different kinds of attention coming your way and I really like it, at first I felt odd because I wasnt use to all the comments that I even took it offensively but not anymore. So I guess the band may have something to do with it after all hugh.

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the band builds confidence in yourself and self esteem and makes you realize "Why am I putting up with so much sh*t???"

My husband is flipping OUT about the attention men give me.

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This topic has been on mind since before i decided to have it done. I have 4 friends that have had the band or gastric, and all of them today are divorced because of extra marital affairs. I guess they just get a big head with all the attention they get from others. Well i hope i never fall in this category. Maybe its because they haven't heard how beautiful they are in a long, long, long time! So a warning to all you married people, work together and always let each other know how much you care!

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Good luck to all of you,

I am sure that you deservr the love and respect for

what you are doing for your self, and you deserve to be happy.

I just know my husband loves me the way that i am and i know he will

love me all the same thin, i am verry lucky have been merried for 23 years this year, oh! and he is paying for my band. what a great man.

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I don't think its about all the extra attention I think the problems where there all along and the weight loss did help me feel better about myself but my husband wanted me big because I notice he has this thing for big girls (he meet me at 250) and the problems we had where associated with him being so irresponsible not about either one of use having an affair. He did meet 2 women 2 weeks ago when I left for vacation but I don't think he had the time to have an affair because I left him as soon as I fould out. (He could'nt behave for a week).

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I hope everything works out for you,

I dont even have my band yet I get it on Sep 13, I realy can't wait.

Wow I am proud of you you have lost alot of weight I hope I can do as well, I guess it realy is going to be life changing,

no one realy knows untill they go through it, this is a journey I am so been waiting for and i'm so glad i found all of you going through it to.

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La Bella were you referreing to me?? It has taken me a long tim to lose the weight because 8 months after my band I got pregnant so I also have a band baby that is 16 months old and it took me after he was over a year old to want to start lossing again, its harder than when we first have the surgery because its all by will power and the motivation is gone because of the weight gain with the pregnancy.

I went back in July (7/19) to get a fill and I was 191 and as of today I am 177 I am starting all over and feel great. I am also happy about my separation because it was just full of problems and I was unhappy for a long time before I made my decision. Thanks for the support everyone.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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