Hi everyone,

After several years of trying to work with my doctor to lose weight, she finally recommended a visit with our weight center.

I went to the orientation and they discussed the options - a general diet/exercise plan w/ personal trainer, a medication plan and a surgery plan. It never occurred to me that I might consider surgery to help my problem. I didn't care for the idea of permanently altering one of my vital organs - for life - but I am at the point where I am SO frustrated with my weight and myself for not being able to lose weight through diet and exercise alone. Then again, as of today I barely qualify for weight loss surgery - my BMI teeters between 39 and 40. (BTW, I'm 4' 11" and around 195lbs). I know there are people who have a LOT farther to go than me, so I shouldn't feel so bad for myself.

My appointment with the nutritionist, psychologist and MD aren't until late August, so I have time to think and do my research. They may not even recommend surgery at first, but if given the option, I find myself not wanting to immediately say "no".

What made you decide to take the plunge and go in for the surgery? Did you feel like you "failed" in any way? I'm afraid to even talk with my husband about it at this point. He's also a big guy, so I'm not sure what he'd say if I said I wanted weight loss surgery when he is also overweight.

Mine was a gradual decision. A very good friend of mine told me that she was having the surgery, and I started looking into it. I made an appointment in May for the information session and to meet with the nutritionist and the surgeon. The surgeon thought that I would be a good candidate for the sleeve. My plan was to proceed with caution.

I started going to the support group meetings, and made the follow up appointments to see my PCP, psych, etc. I also started researching the procedures and what life is like after weight loss surgery. I have also been having an ongoing conversation with my friend about how things are going with her (she's 2 months post op and has lost 40lbs). After my second appointment with the surgeon's office I decided for sure to have the surgery.

I had never really considered weight loss surgery as a viable option before, but like you, and many others, I have tried over and over again on my own to lose this weight and have been unsuccessful. I know it won't be easy after WLS, but I will have a very effective internal watchdog governing my food intake, and I can't wait to get down to a healthier weight!

@@KaiserKid .... So I think what you're really asking is when did we decide it was right to go ahead with SURGERY, not necessarily the sleeve?

I am pre-op, hoping for a late summer surgery. For me it came very very slowly but then very very suddenly. Slowly BC I have been seriously considering it for years, but I was embarrassed to admit it to my husband; he's a triathlete, runs marathons, and thinks the answer to any weight problem is to eat salad until the weight melts away. And I am talking about a girly salad: lettuce, tomato, cucumber, raw mushrooms, and a little bit of light dressing. No Protein, just....grass.

So I hid this desire for years, BC I feared he would think I was copping out. But in Nov I moved out of our home BC of marital issues, and I started deeply focusing on me. In the spring I read an article in the New York Times on a study where The Biggest Loser contestants from one season were followed for six years, and how the overwhelming majority gained all their weight back, how they had wrecked their metabolism, and how the one person who had maintained her loss attributed it to 2-3 hour workouts every day AND coming to terms with the fact that she felt truly hungry all day and would for the rest of her life. That sounded like hell.

And then I read another NYT article on an NIH study that showed how people who have fought lifetime serious obesity and who managed to lose 100 pounds or more, had a 5% chance of not regaining their weight and returning to morbid obesity.

5% chance. It was like a lightning bolt ripped through my heart.

I have beaten so many odds in my life. I am a first generation American, my grandparents were prisoners in Hitler's labor camps, my mother was born in a displaced persons camp in Germany after the liberation. The scars of the trauma of WW2 lived on in my family; my mother was abused as a child, and she married a man who had been abused. Both of my parents went on to be extremely abusive to my siblings and me. One of my siblings committed suicide as a direct result of the abuse. BUT.... I got out, I got away, I was the first person in my family to go to college (and to an Ivy League one, though my parents didn't quite understand the significance), and I paid my way through 90% myself. I married a decent kind man who did not abuse me, I broke the cycle of childhood abuse and never hit or emotionally abused my children (who are decent, law abiding, sensitive human beings who contribute to society). But this obesity thing.....I never, ever could beat it. I have tried to beat it since my mother put me on my first diet at age 8.

So I finally decided that it was completely ok that I seek help for the one damn thing I could not beat, and that was endangering my health. And what about my husband thinking that I was copping out with WLS?......all of a sudden, my answer was "I don't give a damn what he thinks. I know who I am, and I know I am not copping out by asking for help with this."

And that was it. I was in. I wasn't weak, and I was asking for medical help for the one condition my formidable work ethic had not been able to conquer.

I am not afraid of hard work. But I am afraid of worrying about what other people think and foolishly turning away the help available to me.

So it was slow, and sudden. Literally a switch flipped when I saw the odds, and that was it.

Still don't know if it will be sleeve or RNY yet, though....will let the surgeon tell me at my next appt on July 14.

Which also turns out to be my 25th wedding anniversary. Oh, someone up there guiding fate has a sense of humor.....

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when I really thought about how.often I had lost and regained and as I aged it was nearly impossible to lose.

no regrets!

Took a long time. My brother had a sleeve done and I remember him bringing up why he did it. All I could think of was I don't want surgery. It's super scary and I'm young I can do it all on my own.

Two years later higher weight then when the topic first came up. I said the risks outweighed the current life style and where I was headed physically. I wanted kids I wanted to live as long as my husband.

So May 2016 I was a nervous wreck but I went to my first consult. August 3rd I get sleeved. I'm happy and nervous because my fear of surgery has not gone away. My hopes have been filled with a positive outlook on what my life will be like on the other side of sleeve.

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@@KaiserKid

And that was it. I was in. I wasn't weak, and I was asking for medical help for the one condition my formidable work ethic had not been able to conquer.

This is exactly how I feel too - you put it much more eloquently

When I realized that I couldn't just stop overeating to lose weight. If I tackled overeating I could stop gaining and gaining but in order to lose I needed to really restrict myself and I knew I couldn't succeed at that without a tool.

So it was that and after I'd done enough research to satisfy safety concerns.

I've been overweight for the last 10 years after the birth of my daughter the weight just kept coming on but I've always been healthy, able to walk the whole Central Park , run be active etc. this past spring I got a hernia, varicose veins getting worse , acid reflux all these are signs that my body is no longer tolerating the weight. I always saw surgery as the easy way out but after researching Vsg I changed my mind & chose it for myself

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I'd been really bothered about my weight for the past few years when I struggled to find things that looked nice and felt nice that also fit.. shopping had become the most miserable thing and I was also huffing and puffing to do the things I used to love doing.

I would have considered surgery as an option if I had known about the sleeve earlier.. I'd heard of gastric bypass - but the things I'd heard about it I knew weren't for me - a lifetime of tons of supplements, high incidence of dumping syndrome, lots of post op complications that can develop and so on.. And I knew I couldn't follow those rules.

Finally one night when I was thoroughly frustrated because I didn't get a job I interviewed for.. I decided to randomly google about weight loss surgery.. I took the leap because for now - I don't have a job and I'm on medicaid.. and it occurred to me that when I find a job.. I might not be able to afford the co-pay they would demand and that this might be my only chance if surgery was something I wanted to consider.. so I went ahead and looked at the different types and lo and behold I found the sleeve..

It was basically everything I wanted.. less invasive and less scary than bypass.. no equipment left inside like the band.. and the rules are a little more adaptable to each person (e.g. I've been drinking with a straw since day 1 post surgery and I don't know how I'd survive without it because it helps me control better the size of the sip coming into my mouth - which is very helpful when I'm feeling super restricted) based on their needs, and the risks of complications were less..

I watched a seminar about the surgery and googled for the rest of the evening for articles - everything from blogs to medical journals. It took me about 4 hours total to decide I was going to seek a consult for sleeve surgery and I called my doctor the next day. I've never looked back

Compared to others.. my decision was a lot quicker but... that's also just how I am.. I don't take a lot of time to decide things.. I weigh the facts and make a decision in a short amount of time.

About 4 weeks post op!! Lol. The first 4 weeks I was so sick and had complications that I regretted it. Not I'm 8 weeks out and I love it!!

Hi everyone,

After several years of trying to work with my doctor to lose weight, she finally recommended a visit with our weight center.

I went to the orientation and they discussed the options - a general diet/exercise plan w/ personal trainer, a medication plan and a surgery plan. It never occurred to me that I might consider surgery to help my problem. I didn't care for the idea of permanently altering one of my vital organs - for life - but I am at the point where I am SO frustrated with my weight and myself for not being able to lose weight through diet and exercise alone. Then again, as of today I barely qualify for weight loss surgery - my BMI teeters between 39 and 40. (BTW, I'm 4' 11" and around 195lbs). I know there are people who have a LOT farther to go than me, so I shouldn't feel so bad for myself.

My appointment with the nutritionist, psychologist and MD aren't until late August, so I have time to think and do my research. They may not even recommend surgery at first, but if given the option, I find myself not wanting to immediately say "no".

What made you decide to take the plunge and go in for the surgery? Did you feel like you "failed" in any way? I'm afraid to even talk with my husband about it at this point. He's also a big guy, so I'm not sure what he'd say if I said I wanted weight loss surgery when he is also overweight.

I had originally made the decision to get the gastric sleeve when I was 21 years old and in college. At that time, I was very self-conscious about my weight. Being in college and being surrounded by people who were my age and were at least 100 pounds lighter than me made me feel embarrassed that I had let myself go. I had reached a point in my life where I was tired of being the biggest person in the room. I don't like having to avoid having fun because of my size and I certainly don't like feeling like I'm 40 when I'm only 25. I've missed out on way too many things in my life because I let my weight get the best of me.

Are you there God? It's me, Gigi.

My sis had the VSG several years ago and has been after me to do it. Since I'd lost weight effectively in the past, I kept saying no I can do it on my own. However, the last 5-6 years my weight has gone up and up. I promised myself about 2 years ago if I hadn't made a significant impact on my weight by the end of the year, I'd consider surgery. Then I started struggling with symptoms that ended up being diagnosed as auto-immune arthritis, and it became incredibly hard to maintain an eating plan or exercise. I was still on the fence because of the permanence and some misconceptions I had about what life would look like post-sleeve. Then I discussed it with my rheumatologist who gave me more information about what the surgery could do for my overall health, all on its own, plus everything I already knew that would be a benefit post-surgery. Because we need to change my meds for the arthritis, and doing the surgery after the change would be problematic, I started the process and am hoping for approval and a mid-August surgery.

Late to the party here but posting anyway lol. I have been considered over weight since the age of 5. I have no idea what a skinny me would look like, but that isn't what made me decide to do this. My brother and sister in law were going to have a baby (I already had a 13 year old nephew and sis in law brought 2 kiddos from a previous marriage). I looked at these kids and the potential of this new life and i started thinking how much I really wanted to be around to see them grow up graduate from high school, college, watch them get married and have kids of their own. And i started thinking I wasn't going to be able to do that if I didn't take care of myself and work on sticking around. My new nephew was born April 30th, and my first visit with my doctor was May 11th, with surgery set for Aug 25th. I'm nervous and excited and just plain ready to go. I have to start getting healthier so I can chase these kiddos around!

My mom had bypass surgery about 12 years ago. It honestly saved her life, but it caused so many problems for her that I KNEW I would never have it done. Years later, I heard people talking about the lap band and I knew that wasn't for me either. I had never put much more thought into surgery than that, even though I had been overweight my entire life and since the birth of my son, had been getting progressively bigger and bigger.

I still kept trying to lose the weight on my own, to no success (or temporary success) and was getting more frustrated with myself by the day. I couldn't play with my very active toddler for long and had just been diagnosed with diabetes. Then a friend of mine, who is considerably smaller than me said she was scheduled to have sleeve surgery. It was like a sign that smacked me in the face. I came to the conclusion that my situation was more than I could accomplish alone and that I needed help. It was sort of a "failure" thing with me, but I have never been one to ask for any type of help without thinking of it as being something I should be able to handle by myself.

Choosing surgery is not admitting defeat and I think that is what I really had to wrap my head around. There is nothing wrong with asking for help when you truly need it. For me, the decision came down to my son. If this help that I am getting is going to give me a longer healthier life to spend with my son, I am more than okay with that.

Remember that this is a tool for the rest of your life and not a quick fix. You need to tell your husband, so that you guys can use this tool together. Otherwise, you may be setting yourself up for failure.