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Ok , here is my delima my husband is very insecure and is already complaining about me losing weight before I've even had surgery. Has anyone else had this problem and how did you cope? Worried it may compromise my journey!

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Honey let nothing are no one come between your journey. Let your husband know u are doing this to save your life.This is your life and you the one has to live it. Take care i hope for the best for you

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hopefully it will be as easy as reassuring him that you are married to him no matter what your weight is. you may need couples counseling to deal with any unhealthy issues lurking below the surface,

I suppose I might tell him, "do you think I'm only married to you because I am fat and have no other options? no. I chose you and will continue to choose you".

I am almost at the weight I was when I married my husband. He is thrilled and delighted with my new health, energy and shape. but I worry what will happen as I move toward a normal BMI, as he has never dated girls who were not a little voluptuous. but, we will deal with it if he finds me less attractive. We dealt with it when I was heavier than he liked too. We've dealt with far bigger monsters than that. He was scared to death he was going to loose me to a stroke a couple of years ago and my health is just too important.

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Just curious you say he is already insecure and you haven't even had surgery... What's causing him to be insecure now?... Sounds like this is something going on with him and maybe the way he views/interacts with life.

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Have you considered couples counseling? Therapy?

Have you been including him on things like your nutrition classes, appointments?

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Just curious you say he is already insecure and you haven't even had surgery... What's causing him to be insecure now?... Sounds like this is something going on with him and maybe the way he views/interacts with life.

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He thinks I'm going to leave him after I loose weight.

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Have you considered couples counseling? Therapy?

Have you been including him on things like your nutrition classes, appointments?

Yes I have included him, but I do think counseling would be a good idea, thank you for your advice.

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Thank you all for your advice I really appreciate it, I have to be strong and I hope he will be a good supporter.

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It's hard to change people's thinking... I don't think some men do well adapting to new situations... Good luck on your journey

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I had an amazing turnaround - 1 day

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Lol my husband has ALWAYS ENCOURAGED my to GAIN weight these past 23 years of marriage. He does NOT want me to get the surgery but not because he thinks I will leave him but because he is worried something will go wrong in surgery. Poor guy. He is so worried about me. I'm not!! I'm ready to start my new healthy life!!

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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