Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Getting used to losing - permanently



Recommended Posts

So, I got banded on 8/6. I'm down about 12 pounds already. The thing is, I can't seem to generate that excited "Yay! I'm losing!" feeling. I've had it about a million times before - every other time I tried to lose weight - but then the weight always came back. Sometimes with astonishing speed. I regained 45 pounds in 6 weeks after my shake diet last year. :phanvan

So what's the deal? How come THIS time - the time that is most likely to be permanent - I feel so blah? What about that "Today is the first day of the rest of my life!" feeling I was looking forward too? :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

That yahoo feeling will come when that scale continues to go down after you are banded and it doesn't come back - not meaning that your weight doesn't fluctuate, because it does but the next day it is usually down again! My husband gets excited for me when I say ----Yahoo another pound.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am going through the same thing. I have lost 25 lbs so far and its like I am numb or something. It is a shame because 25 lbs is a big deal but I am like whatever...I guess it is from feeling let down so many times before.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I hear ya! I've lost about 68 lbs so far (combination of pre and post-band loss) and I'm still not getting that excited feeling. It's frustrating when folks are starting to notice and are excited for me and I'm not gleeful.

It's weird as heck!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am so glad to hear I'm not crazy!!! Seriously, it's so nice just to know that others have the same weird letdown. :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am at gola weight. I have been for over a year now, and I don't, and never did have that feeling. I mean, I was happy that I was losing, thrilled when I got to goal, but for my money, while losing weight was a big thing in my life, there are other more exciting things to feel thrilled about.

I think I have just put weight loss into perspective. It's great, but its not my whole life.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am at gola weight. I have been for over a year now, and I don't, and never did have that feeling. I mean, I was happy that I was losing, thrilled when I got to goal, but for my money, while losing weight was a big thing in my life, there are other more exciting things to feel thrilled about.

I think I have just put weight loss into perspective. It's great, but its not my whole life.

Wow, putting weight loss into perspective? I have fought this fight my whole life. I am 43 years old. I can't even begin to imagine not thinking about it or worrying over it. Or how about being treated like a normal person and not some lazy overweight piece of crap. I am happy for you that you have it like that. I get my band on August 29 th. 1 pound or 100 pounds I will be thankful for every one. Yes, there are other exciting things in life, but right now this is the most important thing to me... Maybe when I get to goal I will feel different. But I wonder how anyone would feel if they had to lose their band. I bet then you would feel way different.

Please don't think I am being mean. I just can't imagine it not being a "BIG" part of my life right now.

Congrats on your journey!

Mary

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I can relate to the feelings of not being excited about the weight loss - it doesn't seem real. I will be banded on the 24th of August, and am starting to lose on the pre-brand diet (Optifast), but my personal history has been lose 20 - 25 pounds and within a few months regain that plus another 20. The only time my weight seemed to stabalize (I didn't gain) was when I quit trying to lose.

My expectation is that these feelings will change once I surpass my previous losses and continue to lose. That will be the turning point.

Cindy:clap2:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The difference is that you KNOW that this time is it, is real, and is long term. That you really are changing, and that you have come so far to reach this point, that instead of feeling Eurphoria, what you are feeling is the PEACE of KNOWING.

That is definitely the case for me. That joyous "high" of losing weight in the past for me has always been a kind of "Make hay while the sun shines" joy, because I knew in my heart I should enjoy it while I could, because the weight would ultimately be back. After the first couple spins on the diet and re-gain it wheel, I don't think I ever believed again that my loss was permanent.

Now I know it is. And that feels like peace of mind, not euphoria.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have to say I am very excited about losing weight - 38lbs so far is wonderful! But Maybe the overall issue is after having gone so far as to have surgery and alter how you eat for the rest of your life we have a little bit of a subconscious let down because it's not an instant fix...wake up and be half way there or something, although I know that is not even a possibility - I guess that my secret heart of hearts has seen way to many bewitched and I dream of Jeanie episodes!

Be proud of yourself though! I mean, you still have the option to eat ice cream and fill up on junk...so every day you don't you have won a small victory for your body and ultimately all those small victories will lead you to what is for all of us the bigger goal! Being happier, healthier people! Otherwise who would have gone through all of this and spent all that money! Take care!

Chris

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

This loosing weight business takes a lot of head work. Because we (at least I) have lost and gained it all back so many times before, it seems natural to believe it will happen again. Except that it won't, because this time we are not alone, we have this wonderful tool to help us along and keep us on track. It still takes change in lifestyle, and that's where the head work comes in. But I agree with dialit, this time for me is more about peace of mind and less about euphoria.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think too that I am not looking forward to people seeing me lose *again*. You walk around and hear people say, "Oh, you look great! What are you doing to lose weight?" Is the "this time" implied, or is that just me?? And while I don't want to tell the world, "This time it's for real! It's forever! I've got my band!", it saddens me to think that most people will walk off thinking, "She's just going to gain it back."

I KNOW I need to not give a damn what others think, but it's so hard to ignore. The truly important people in my life - my kids and husband - know about the band and are so proud of me for making this choice. They're the ones I don't want to disappoint - again.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Dialit has a really good point. Peace of Mind. WoW! I haven't had that in about 30 year of my 35! I can remember worrying about weight as young as 5/6. So, I am wanting the euphoria and the peace of mind. I want the high that comes with being a person with a good Self Esteem and not giving a D@#$ what others think! I want to know that I am the best I can be, my weight has always put a big glitch in the way I see myself. Thats the euphoria I am shooting for! Peace Of Mind is the not having to battle with the ups and downs of weight loss/gain. Not having to battle with food.....oh, oh, I want one more bite! For me, you see, it is a mixture of both euphoria and peace. A euphoric peace!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think I have a sense of freedom more than excitement. Its hard to appreciate though because my body is moving way faster than my brain. I look in the mirror and don't recognize myself. Yesterday I was out on my hammock and when getting up I caught a glimpse of my thigh. Did I say my thigh? This thigh was attached to my body but it sure wasn't mine. It was too slim and tan. It was a total disconnect. Today I will talk to my therapist about these feelings and try to work them through.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think too that I am not looking forward to people seeing me lose *again*. You walk around and hear people say, "Oh, you look great! What are you doing to lose weight?" Is the "this time" implied, or is that just me?? And while I don't want to tell the world, "This time it's for real! It's forever! I've got my band!", it saddens me to think that most people will walk off thinking, "She's just going to gain it back."

I'm right there with ya. the "this time" is definitely implied. Or when they say "So-and-so had that surgery and she gained it all back a year later." Puh-lease!! Can these people not be supportive!?! Morons!! :lol:

Sigh. That's why I come here for extra support.:biggrin1:

Madfroglady.

weight.png

event.png

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×