Hi everyone- I'm about 2 months out from a potential surgery date and I'm wondering how ya'll cope with telling friends/family/coworkers. I'm a very private person and feel that I won't want to tell people. However, if I have very noticeable and fast weight loss, I would guess people would suspect I had surgery. It's not that I'm embarrassed, like I said, just a private person. Any advice you can share?

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Hot subject here -

Suggestion from me, would be that make sure YOU are okay with your decision to tell or not and proceed from there.

Its really nobody's business but yours.

You don't have to share everything (surgery info) you can give them the overall plan - you are eating better and change the subject.

I kept my decision low key and shared when co-workers started wondering if I was sick (about 2-3months post). I have run into a couple of snarky responses but in general all very supportive. Blessed.

Good luck

seems to be a hot button topic around here.

I just told anyone who cared to know. I'd rather hear it and move on with my life, but I am not easily influenced by others. At work when a couple of nosy peeps asked, once I told them, and told them it wasn't a secret I knew everyone would know with very little trouble to me.

I had a coworker who had the procedure a year and a few months before me, so it was no new big deal to anyone, and I had an uncle who had the sleeve 2 years ago so it was not a big deal in my family either.

I encountered a lot of misinformation, but I don't mind educating people so it doesn't bother me.

if it bothers you to tell people when they ask about your weight loss (especially if they are truly concerned for you) just ell them, yes, it's good. I am healthy - I am loosing weight on purpose, and a doctor is watching out for me. They don't need to know any details. it's just a personal choice how open you care to be, neither way is right or wrong.

I also have chosen to keep my business my own. When taking time off work and away from normal activities, I simply explained that I was treating my endometriosis (which has been an ongoing issue for me) and left it at that. Nobody wants to elaborate on that anyway.

It's not a lie- I really do have that. It's just my way of doing things my way.

Do what you need to do to take care of yourself especially around people you cannot trust. But then just remember that we're only as sick as the secrets we keep and part of your recovery has to do with building a life that includes people who you can trust. But first you have to trust yourself. I had no problem telling anyone (except about 3 mean girls in my office--- the ringleader of which is gaining weight now). But I figured that everyone would figure it out when I suddenly dropped 100 lbs. Gaining the weight I wish I could have hidden. But losing the weight...well I'll tell anyone who will stand still long enough to listen that I've lost 88 lbs in the past 8 months. I would scream that from the rooftops. I'm proud and I hope that you too can be proud of the decision that you've made to take care of yourself.[emoji4]

I didn't mind telling my close friends and family and some coworkers.

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Beware! Opening a Pandora's Box...!!!

MY opinion:

I did not want to spend the effort to try to remember just what I told to whom. So, I just told folks the "truth"...the facts.

You'll be surprised how telling about your WLS in a factual, bare facts manner will smother all of the fun out of "gossiping".

--and doubt it not....if you work within the healthcare world, your co-workers WILL find out!

Only you can make the "tell or not tell" final decision. Just be sure it's one you can live with.

Good luck, my friend.

Prayers going up for you.