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Hi everyone, this is my first post on here..

I need a huge kick up the bum, and I am hoping that you could all help me out, or tell me I'm not the only that has done this, I feel absolutely terrible with myself and a complete failure of a person..

I was sleeved on January 22nd so I am almost 3 months out, and I have lost 27kg which I believe is around 59 pounds -

I have just recently maybe the last two - three days just totally fallen off my eating plan, I was in tears last night about how disgusted and upset I am with myself, on Saturday we were at a friends house and she made chicken sasuage rolls, they where cut into 4 or 5 pieces so they weren't big, (maybe 3cm) however I managed to snack on about two of them and then eat half a sasuage from the BBQ, this is a lot of food compared to what I have been eating, so I was upset with myself, I did not feel sick so I guess I didn't over eat?

Sunday I was fine, Monday I went out and made those yummy sasuage rolls because I wanted to make them for my husband, I managed to eat 2 and a half on Monday night, THEN a few hours later I wanted another one, God knows why,? ate it and vomitted, this is when I thought omg, have I stretched my stomach? What is wrong with me? Why do I just want to keep eating when I know I can't? Then today I was good and fine during the day. I had a little bit of mince meat with sauce for dinner and then when I was making my husband lunch for work tomorrow I seen another little sasuage roll in the fridge and ate it, I think I ate it to fast and threw up again, I am not absolutely disgusted in myself and don't know what's wrong with me... Am I eating too much? Have I stretched my stomach? am I over reacting? Guys I'm so upset I just can't even handle it, why I would go through all this just to eat shit food again?

Please give me a big kick up the ass or tell me I'm just loosing my mind and over reacting? I just don't know :(

Thank you!

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

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I'm not very good at swift kicks.

It sounds to me like you are just trying to adjust to real life. It is fairly easy to follow our program early out when it is so structured. Once we get to a place where we can make choices it gets harder.

One thing I like to do is focus on what I "can" have instead of what I "can't".

What is it about the sausage rolls that were so attractive to you especially to the point where you ate them until they made you sick and then went back for more?

Could you find an alternative that satisfies whatever it is you are looking for? For instance, making a lower fat/lower carb version with turkey sausage, etc? (Fatty/greasy foods don't sit well with me anymore. I might have been nauseous, too if they were greasy.)

Also, whatever I choose to eat, I make sure I record it in MyFitnessPal. It is a great way to weigh my options. I can quickly see whether or not the extra calories/fat/whatever are worth it.

Don't let this situation derail you. You can learn from it and let it help you be successful.

This is where a good counselor or therapist can be very helpful. To help put things in perspective and to help learn new coping skills and attitudes.

Also, if you struggle with wanting to eat compulsively, you might want to consider looking into a 12-step recovery group for compulsive eating like OA (OA.org).

Keep us posted on how you are doing.

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@inner suffer girl -

Wow, I really appreciate the reply, I truly feel much better and more at ease with myself..

You are right it's much harder to make choices now, I was happy to sip sip sip my Water, cordial and juice on my liquid stage :)

I actually am not sure what it is about these damn sausage rolls :') I think it might just be the crunchyness of the pastry? I'm not sure? But I need them out of my life...

You are totally on point with the my fitness pal app - I will download it right now, and tomorrow is a new day :)

Thank you so much xox

Much appreciated,

Jess

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

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Okay, one thing at a time, sweet girl.

1. You are going to be okay.

2. Vomiting is your body's way of saying "that was too much, please don't feed me that much again", so listen to your body and take a note on your phone or notepad, or whatever and keep it in mind. Our eyes are bigger than our stomachs, even a few months out.

3. Remember when your doc, or whoever told you before the surgery that the surgery itself isn't a fix? It's just a tool. It's a temporary thing while you work on the mental part of why we overeat and why we turn to food for comfort / boredom, etc.

4. If you've vomited, you've probably eaten too much at that sitting.

5. Yes, the stomach can stretch, but that probably takes a bit longer than the few months from your surgery, so I don't think an occasional overeating will stretch it. Just be mindful of each meal.

6. If you mess up, DON'T FRET. Just start the next meal or the next morning, a fresh start.

7. If you have the resources (insurance / finances / time), maybe research a counselor to help figure out the mental part of the puzzle.

8. You're not overreacting.

9. You're doing great!!!! 59 pounds is AWESOME!!

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@@momof2tx

Thank you so much, I really appreciate the reply..

I was woken up and this is the first thing I read and I can tell you I am feeling much better...

You are right, today is a new day, and in back to my eating plan and no more crappy foods...

I think I will research a councillor today and look into going to see one :)

Thank you so much xoxoxox

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      1. summerseeker

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        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

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