Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Surgery woes: Grandpa begged me not to have the surgery



Recommended Posts

BTW, this is completely silly to feel or say, but ... your mom really pissed me off.

;)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Awesome that you're feeling so good!! You have "balls" for dealing with all the family crap & having the surgery--you got this girl!! :)

Sent from my SM-G925V using the BariatricPal App

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Awee sorry to hear that . family could be worse than a stranger. It can be alot of things maybe they are just to scared or this is how they deal with the fear .... My friend /supervisor supports me all the way cause she knows a pack of wild horses couldn't stop me if they tried. that is what she always say to me. as long as you did your research and you feel comfortable you do you... another reason not to tell many people. on tuesday when i went April 5 to have my surgery (revision ) band to sleeve my husband was taking me and guess who popped up at my house at 8 am ... yes my mom who i didnt tell because i dont want to hear her mouth and for her to be worried. so i was rushing out and she asked if i was leaving for work so early i said No no work going to get epidural shot in my back she knows of my back problem so she is use to that. Yup did not tell her.. Unfortunately i didn't get the sleeve done cause my band had slipped and doc said that he wanted to let my stomache heal cause it was bruised and too close to my esophogus. so im scheduled for May 24 for the sleeve. he did take the band out. so just healing now.. sooooooo i already told my mom im going back may 24the for another set of shots and this time i might stay over. lololol whatever works. i usually tell her after i do things like liposuction, the band ect.. because again i did my research im very comfortable with my decision and my hubby is my support no matter what i do.. Where do you live. do you have friends that can come and get you. is there a bariatric group that you go to maybe someone there can help you out. if not girlll get in a cab and go home...dont sweat it.

Im in Rockland County NY if you are around let me know.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

oh you got it done whoohoooo. and you live in Cali lol too far from me. CONGRATULATIONS PRETTY LADY..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

This is a great community. They have a lot of great tips and support no matter what kind of WLS you decide.

Congratulations on your determination with or without familial support.

Please know many care and keep posting!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

As for a ride home I had gotten in contact with a distant relative I can't rely on my mom especially after what she just did to me. She went through my mail at my grandparents house where Im staying until after my surgery whe n I'm able to finish moving into my apartment and stole my new debit card and somehow activated it and spent some of my money. I was able to catch it before she spent too much money and had the card locked. I can't believe she would do this while I'm in the hospital.

Sent from my SGH-T399N using the BariatricPal App

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

As for a ride home I had gotten in contact with a distant relative I can't rely on my mom especially after what she just did to me. She went through my mail at my grandparents house where Im staying until after my surgery whe n I'm able to finish moving into my apartment and stole my new debit card and somehow activated it and spent some of my money. I was able to catch it before she spent too much money and had the card locked. I can't believe she would do this while I'm in the hospital.

Sent from my SGH-T399N using the BariatricPal App

That is horrible! I hope you press charges on her. People that would steal from their own family (especially when they're incapacitated and in the hospital for surgery) are just awful and you don't need someone that hateful and selfish in your life. Cut her off, and file a police report as soon as you can.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

So glad everything went well. I am still doing my tests I need, before I am approved. I have 3 of my 6 nutrition visits completed and almost all required testing. I wish there was a way around me having to do 6 months of supervised weigh-ins. As for your mom...I am really suggesting for your own good you cut her out of your life, at least until she is ready to get her life together. I would not report her to the police if she were my mom, as I get the feeling you won't do either. However, you really need to make a decision if you want to be successful, and that is...Are you going to start putting yourself first? It appears by having this surgery you are already taking control, sometimes it just takes baby steps but you will get there. Best of luck!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Wow! Your mom stole your debit card!

So sorry you are dealing with that.

It's time for you to focus on yourself.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

As for a ride home I had gotten in contact with a distant relative I can't rely on my mom especially after what she just did to me. She went through my mail at my grandparents house where Im staying until after my surgery whe n I'm able to finish moving into my apartment and stole my new debit card and somehow activated it and spent some of my money. I was able to catch it before she spent too much money and had the card locked. I can't believe she would do this while I'm in the hospital.

Sent from my SGH-T399N using the BariatricPal App

I am so sorry.

It is probably more hassle than you have the energy to deal with right now, but you might want to consider reporting the theft to the police. That is theft, and depending on how much she spent, could be pretty serious.

I definitely recommend that you find a good counselor and do everything you can to put some distance between you and your mom. She sounds really toxic.

You do not need someone like that in your life, especially as you recover from surgery.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@@crazygoose Wow! is all I can say. I am so glad you're doing so good after surgery......and I just want to add that you are a ROCK STAR for being able to deal with everything you're dealing with!!! This weight loss thing will be a piece of cake for you!

I can't imagine any of my family members acting like you've described......You need to stay as far away as possible. I wish you the best of luck and keep up the good work.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks everyone! I'm at my grandparent's house and feeling great physically. My grandpa is slowly coming around he still believes I will get sick but it just gives me incentive to take good care of myself and prove him wrong. I haven't had to take pain meds since two nights ago and the biggest fear I had was that I'd feel pain after surgery and it's just not the case. I definitely feel my sleeve though when I eat and drink. I'm used to eating/drinking fast and the sleeve definitely let's me know when I'm doing it too fast. As for my mom I'm going to cut her out of my life for a bit. I just can't deal with her she has no remorse and then turns around and blames me so I am done I'm going to move forward as if she is dead until she gets her life together.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Im Glad everthing is working out for you your going to do great with your sugery Keep Your Head Up!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×