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Thanks again for all the feedback. Having thought about this a lot now, I do realize that even though I am meeting nutrient goals and losing weight that the desire and attachment to food is creeping in. I really pray that one day I will not have this attachment to food, but for now, I can see how limiting my choices somewhat can help decrease my desire for food. After all, if it is something I really like, I can see how I would be taking that "one more bite" and as my restriction changes, the "one more bites" lead to extra calories.

For what it's worth, this was my therapist not my NUT and we just didn't have enough time to explore it thoroughly so I didn't truly understand what she meant. Thanks to @@CowgirlJane for doing the research and to the others who called me out on this. I defensively thought "I wasn't trying to disprove her!" but after thinking about it for a while, that really is what I was trying to do. I am someone who processes and needs to know "WHY" but I am also tend to rebel and buck against authority if I don't like the rule, so now armed with the knowledge of the "WHY" and the feedback of people calling me on the rebellion, I will go forth with a more healthy attitude about what I will eat (or rather maybe how I will eat) on my Mexico All-Inclusive vacation buffet. I don't leave for just over a week, so I have some time to put this in to practice first.

Oh and PS - just to clarify, the 125 includes 15 pounds pre-surgery diet and 12 pounds in the liquid pre-op diet, so technically 125 pounds in a year. I just like to clarify that because I know when I am seeing posts of massive losses, I always wonder how much was surgery and how much before. :)

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@@Inner Surfer Girl - I'm 8 months post-op. I have lost 124 pounds and am only 15-25 pounds from goal (depending on my final goal which I haven't determined yet. Surgeon original goal for me was under 200 which I reached this week). The food choices this weekend were just odd because of the situation - I was out of town all weekend with family for a soccer tournament. They chose the places to eat so I didn't have a lot of choice. I chose a bloody mary because it just sounded good. And it is only the 2nd time I have had alcohol since surgery and then I only drank half. The different choices these 2 days were from the appetizer menu and were shared with others at the table. They weren't the type of restaurants where I could really order a an entrée just for myself. I ate out 3 other times this week (I eat out a lot) and generally order any type of entrée with grilled chicken - i.e. salad with grilled chicken, fajitas, etc. and I always have leftovers. I get a minimum of 80g of Protein per day and generally get closer to 90 or 100 and I drink minimum of 64 oz of Fluid, generally more. And I take my Vitamins religiously. When I eat at home, I often have 3 to 4 items of food - for example: 2 to 3 oz of chicken or turkey (protein), an ounce (or less) of cheese (protein), and cucumbers (veggie) sometimes a couple of whole wheat crackers. At Breakfast once or maybe twice a week, I have 1/2 of a Cobblestone Flat bread round. I think my diet is fairly well rounded honestly, but the counselor was alarmed at my choices last weekend. To be fair, she only focused on those 2 meals and not what I had eaten the rest of the day or for that matter what I had eaten for the rest of my meals over the last 2 weeks since I had seen her. I logged all of my food and still met my Protein goals, calorie goals and fluid goals each day. If I was eating like that every single day, I agree that would be a very bad idea, but I don't.

I think I just didn't ask my question very well. Thanks to all for the input.

See, context is everything!

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An alternative if you need to eat variety is to eat somewhat like the the Japanese eat. I think I read somewhere that they aim to have 37 different foods a day. What that doesn't mean is 37 food items but more very small amounts/ almost garnish portions/ of 37 ingredients. Multi-ingredient foods like: Soups, stews, casseroles, etc. come to mind.

As far as I can tell, if you do this you really need to be cooking every day. For instance making a pot of vegetable Soup, etc.

This would also be where using a lot of herbs and spices can come into play.

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@@Daisee68 I foresee long term success for you. Recognizing and being self aware enough to act on insights is a powerful tool.

By the time I was sleeved, I had to make a conscious decision to turn myself over to a 2years program. I have been dieting since I was 8years old, and it was hard to not always be second guessing my team of experts. I recongize that I was, for lack of a better word, arrogant on the topic.

Because of my personality, it was very important that I respected the advisors; the universe sent me the best nutritionist EVER and was my resource the first year. What made her different is that she had in depth knowledge of both the nuts and bolts of "how to eat" along with insights on the emotional, and old patterns. I know she steered me in directions that were based on a whole different way than I had done before.

Anyway, here is another, related tip that probably doesn't apply YET but might further down the road. One of my standard lunches is a salmon patty served over a bed of salad with a bit of blue cheese crumbles and white balsamic vinegar and olive oil. A different NUT I saw about a year ago said, "literally eat the Protein before the salad". By eating the dense Protein with lettuce I am missing the satiation that comes from dense protein pressing on the nerve at the "bottom" of the stomach. Dang if she wasn't right, I ate less and stayed satisfied longer when I don't combine food.

I am 4 years post op and keep learning, or in some cases relearning.

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@@Daisee68

How do you track these bites? I wouldn't eat like that just because a "bite" isn't a scientific measurement. There would be no way for me to accurately gauge if I was meeting my Protein goals.

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@@Daisee68

You are doing fantastic! I totally understand where your therapist is coming from but there is also a way to get your variety at the same time.

I will usually have a Protein and good carb at every meal. I just make sure that it is not the same thing everyday. I personally know that I will not be successful that way because like you, I need variety in my food. I also believe that I have so little space that what I do choose to eat had to fulfill my nutrient requirements but also satisfy me. If it don't I find myself going off plan. food is still very important in my life so I want it to be worth eating.i refuse to eat prepackaged, processed, fast food garbage. I make most of my meals from scratch and I make sure I change it up everyday.

I don't know about most of you but I know that I have made choices that are not always the best when eating out but I try to limit the occurances of that happening to once in a while. I am usually pretty good about my selections.

I am in control of what I eat and I know that if I choose to have a couple chips every once in a while I adjust the rest of my day. Or if I decide I need something sweet i will fight it until I finally give in. The difference is I have a bite or two and know that I can control myself. I remember once making a whole apple pie (before surgery), slowly throughout that weekend I ate that whole damn pie. I was mortified! Now if I were to have a couple bites of that pie I am satisfied and I am in control.

Honestly for me if I abstain completely that is when I get into trouble.

You are doing fantastic! Maybe see if you can make variety in a different way. Instead of several bites of several foods at one meal, try ensuring there is variety throughout your day and you are trying new recipes. I have found Pinterest to be so helpful in changing what I choose to cook. I am thankful my husband comes along for the ride.

I focus most of my choices on the Protein but I also leverage great veggie recipes as well.

Good luck!

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These posters have such great advice! Sounds like you are being successful, but I hear some of us veterans issuing a warning about long term eating plans .

Many of us eat Protein rich food religiously and find a sort of rhythm in keeping our weight and meals in check.

I think the last meals had lousy choices and you coped .....

But down the road .... Be aware that it is more difficult to continue great choices unless you have a different mindset.... For me anyway....

Everyone is different in finding their way....

You have done so well!!! Best wishes on continued success????

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Thanks everyone for the great advice as usual.

@@Inner Surfer Girl - I forget that people on the mobile app cannot see my status / tickers, so you are right my info was a bit out of context. Appreciate the advice about Soups, etc.

@@CowgirlJane - Thank you very much for that vote of confidence! Means a lot coming from you! I like the tip about very literally Protein first. Part of where I got caught up is that I was SO sick in the beginning with what turned out to be a stricture and I was having to be so very careful with the kinds of foods I ate only being what I thought I could "Tolerate" (before we knew it was the stricture). We didn't figure that out until 3 or 3 1/2 months post-op. Then the next few months I had a lot of nausea and slowly had to figure out what I could tolerate. In that journey, everyone (including myself) was so excited when I ate a new food and didn't get sick! So I think what that turned in to though was more of a challenge to see what I COULD eat and even though I was meeting my nutrient goals, I wasn't necessarily always paying attention to what I SHOULD eat. I have never eaten a healthy diet and I struggle with really knowing what that means. For me, for now, it means going back to limiting some food choices because clearly the broad range of foods was more about testing to see what I could get away with. I am a food addict. Period. I don't want to be, but I am. And I am realizing that I will always be a RECOVERING food addict. It will be easier some days than others, but the more tricks and tips I have, hopefully those become habits and the harder days are fewer and further between.

@@OutsideMatchInside - I track everything I eat. If I am at home, I weigh and measure everything so I have an accurate count. If I am out, I estimate how much I ate. Frankly 2 bites of most things is probably 2 Tbsp or 1/8 of a cup. Translates easily into a food logging system.

@@Djmohr - As always, I so appreciate your advice and mentorship. Wouldn't have gotten through this journey without you!

@@Julie norton - You are absolutely right! It was the mindset part that I got all out of sorts. (Does it help with the sympathy factor if I tell you I got laid off December 31 and have been sitting at home pouting a bit? Still with that, I have lost 15 pounds since Christmas and a year ago, I would have easily gained 15 pounds sitting home feeling sorry for myself in the same circumstance!) Anyway, mindset is definitely my issue. As I said above, I got caught up in what I COULD eat and stopped focusing on what I SHOULD eat.

To show you that I did learn something from this, I have been out all day for soccer games again (nephews). I packed items to eat which included beef Jerky. I went to eat it while ago but also had a choice of apple slices and all natural Peanut Butter. I grabbed the beef Jerky and then literally said out loud to myself "You have already had enough processed food today. Eat something closer to a whole food." I think that was a good choice. To be honest, I don't love apples and Peanut Butter. I don't dislike it either, but because it isn't as good to me as beef jerky, it isn't something that I would eat too much of and I feel a bit virtuous getting in some good whole food with Vitamins. At least I think that is what this whole thread means about making good choices.

Again, much love to you all for all the guidance! I talk about all of you all the time to my family and friends like you are true friends whom I have known forever. They look at me like I'm a bit nuts but oh well!

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In my experience, It's important to develop a lifestyle rather then a "diet". Having variety is more beneficial for me. I have a habit, if I like something, I do it over and over and get bored and then start eating trigger foods which sends me into compulsion.

Focusing on weighing, measuring and obsessing over food, triggers all of my eating disorders. I've also found having variety helps me to be more satisfied. More important for me is to connect with a 12 step program which focuses on mental, physical and spiritual approach to recovery.

That's just been my experience on the road of recovery

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@@Daisee68,

Interesting question! I can definitely see your nutritionist’s point. She apparently sees your patterns at that meal as being similar to patterns that got you in trouble in the first place. And I think there is research to back up that the more variety you have at a meal, the more you are likely to eat.

On the other hand, you didn’t have THAT many foods – you had 5 at the first, and 2 at the second. (By the way, my concern would be the Bloody Mary).

I would ask if you were in control. If you were completely in control of what you ate, you made a sound decision, and you stuck to it, I don’t think it’s a problem. If you start with a chip and turned it into a two-course meal with alcohol, that is more of a problem.

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So in honor of this post, I wrote down everything I ate in the last two days. Many of theses are repeat items that I had both days.....

eggs, bacon, chicken, shredded pork, turkey sausage, shrimp, cheddar cheese, Parmesan cheese, Power Crunch bar, Quest bar, natures valley Protein bar, Quest chips, Greek yogurt, unflavored whey Protein, peanuts, asparagus, spinach, onion, cherry tomatoes, broccoli, baked Beans, red bell pepper, yellow squash, Kashi go lean Cereal, All Bran Cereal, ground flax seed, blueberries, orange, coconut milk, 1/2 and 1/2, Decaf coffee, decaf tea, plain Water, protein hot chocolate, Bai5, Water with sweet leaf flavor drops, dark chocolate candy filled with brandy liquor.

Portions ranged from a couple tablespoons to maybe 1/3 cup (except the liquids) and eaten over 14-15 "meals". My weekday variety is much lower. Probably more like 10-12 different things over 5-6 meals. I guess the OP's therapist would have a field day with me!

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As a rule most days I am boring. Little variety and I know what works. Yeah I do tend to eat more when I taste more different things in a meal (a bite here and there). At restaurants I eat less if I order my own small plate than if I eat a bit of each family members plate instead.

This simple plan got me to goal and keeps me at goal. BUT one or two days a week and especially on vacation I let loose and do the opposite. I sample and taste and love it and have a good time. It's why the price of a buffet doesn't seem a waste to me even though the amount I eat isn't "worth" it.

So.... I say go for t on your cruise you only live once! Then when you get home, get back to basics.

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@@Kindle @@jess9395 - I think the biggest difference in what you can eat and I would should probably be eating is that you are both at goal and have been for quite some time and I am still in weight loss / recovery mode. At least that is what I keep telling myself. Not that reaching goal and being in maintenance will give me an excuse to go wildly off plan, but once I am at the point you both are, maybe I can live with a little more variety like you guys do! That gives me hope anyway! :D

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