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Back in the Game Again

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I'll know what I want when I see it.

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I would focus on myslef and find something I like doing and then hope to meet someone that way, with similar interests!

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Umm, true confession, while I told myself I was looking for love at the beginning of the year (after some very significant weight loss) I think I was really just looking for fun. I found it. Every first date ended up with great sex. I didn't really calm down and finish sowing all the wild oats until August. You may be resisting because you want the affirmation. I think that's what I wanted (at least for a season). Not trying to knock you off stride and I am certainly not one to judge, but be open to that idea.

OKC Pirate....say whaaaaaat? Do men really expect a woman to put out on a first date? Does a man even want a long-term relationship with a woman who puts out on every first date? I sense a Mars / Venus issue here.

Not expected by me for sure. (And certainly not by them either)

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I'm finally done with tons of work travel, spring break with daughter, and bronchitis (thanks to living in pollen central).

@@bellabloom - How is your search going now?

For the record I crunched my Match.com numbers from last year:

I sent 149 emails via their site

I received 61 back

15 coffee dates

6 real dates

3 multiple dates

1 possible match that had to be aborted because there were still issues to be resolved post divorce*

* but this is where it got interesting and how the universe can work for you in ways you don't know.

I had several lady friends I was dating, but not seriously. Some were just physical. Well I broke up this when I met this lady with the issues, because I sensed something special after a few dates. Well, it turns out she has really bad Borderline Personality issues. Opps, and I had broke up with everyone (UGH, back to square one!)

BUT, the very next date "She" showed up and we have been going out for the last eight months and it keeps getting better every time we go out. It wasn't "boom" it was a slow, mature growth in the relationship. But what I marvel at is how the whole dating field was cleared out the week before we met. There were no distractions at that moment.

Things have progressed that She went with me and my daughter to Chicago for Spring Break. Even my 16 year old daughter said "wow I really like her, don't screw this up Dad." Now this is the first women I have ever introduced my daughter to, let alone traveled with.

Moral of the story - it's work, it is providence, its a numbers game. Or in my girlfriend's case, a complete accident. I'm the only person she reached out to on Match. I'm it. The only person she's dated since leaving her marriage. If she wasn't so emotionally stable, I'd be worried, but I'm just not in the least.

Hope this is encouraging.

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    • dmadms  »  ARMoma45

      I saw the post where you were denied the first time because you lost to much weight.  How much did you lose?  I lost 1 # my 2nd month and 6# my third month and scared to death I have screwed up.  
      · 1 reply
      1. ARMoma45

        I lost 11% of my body weight and they wanted me to fail to lose 10%. I even called the insurance company and asked them to clarify because the wording was confusing. I didn't know if they wanted me to lose the 10% or fail to lose the 10%. I was told to lose 10% so I did and apparently the person that I spoke to wasn't correct. But also this was in December and my company was scheduled to change to a different division of BCBS after the first of the year. So that probably played more into the denial than anything.

        I continued my monthly visits and they clearly showed that I plateaued about month 5/6 and began to regain. I originally lost from 333 to 298 and regained back up to 330 but have now lost back down to 318.

    • allwet

      · 1 reply
      1. Orchids&Dragons

        As a tea-a-holic, I'm happy to hear this. Thanks!

    • JamesL73

      One week post-revision, down 5 lbs since surgery day.....which puts me back under 300. VICTORY!!! Still a ways to go but I'll take every little win I can get. Feeling great other than minor abdominal discomfort.
      · 1 reply
      1. ARMoma45

        That's awesome....keep up the great work :)

    • danieocean

      I am officially under my ultimate goal weight...holy cow! Just wanted to share an update on my progress. I didn't take a whole lot of progress pics. The before is the oldest one I have and its 2.5 months post op and the right photo is of me today! Thrilled with my progress. Hoping everyone is happy, healthy and doing great!

      · 5 replies
      1. ms.sss

        you look great!

      2. danieocean

        THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!! I can't believe it happened so fast. 8 months have really flown by!!!

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    • allwet

      Breathe baby breathe
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