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I feel very guilty and upset



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Yesterday I saw my oncology surgeon. While I was undergoing testing to have a gastric bypass they found a cancerous tumor in my stomach. Because of this I had to have a gastric sleeve. I got some bad news yesterday at my doctors office. They said the cancer is high risk for return and I will need Chemo.

Here's the part that bothers me.

Hubby took me out after to eat.

I had Soup and a Smal scoop of egg salad

Then ordered cake I was so upset I ordered cake and ate it. Not the whole thing at once but throughout the day I picked at it. Then I did not have my Protein shake for dinner because I had had the cake.

I need some encouragement please. I am three weeks postop. I think I am down about 25 pounds.

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The fact that you even posted this is a good sign. You know you did something you shouldn't have done, and you're admitting it. Now, just move on. You got hit with an emotional bomb. Would I have done the same? Maybe, maybe not, but as someone who is recovering from using food as a crutch, I can certainly understand why you did.

You've got this. You can do this.

Good luck with the chemo.

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Uh, you just got a cancer diagnosis. You get a pass from me.

But really, use this as an opportunity to get healthy and eat healthy. Putting real, nutritious food in your body instead of sugar and processed foods will help you get through the chemo a little easier. Being at a fighting weight will help you heal and fight, also.

Good luck to you! We are all here for you if you need to rant or just talk about things. I will be thinking about you!

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Hey, it was a piece of cake and not a whole cake. I agree with @@Babbs that being at a healthier weight can help you. Chemo has come a long way, do what you need to do and focus on your diet as a distraction.

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You had a terrible day, enjoy your cake and start over again the next day. There are still plenty of times where I eat my feelings, albeit in smaller portions. A few weeks ago after a difficult day I ate a snack size portion of ice cream and I haven't had any since. There is nothing wrong with the occassional slip-up.

I will think good, positive thoughts for your quick and complete recovery.

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I think you're allowed a bad day or two after that news. I'm sorry you're going through this. My mom had cancer and chemo and it was rough on her! I can't imagine having gastric surgery on top of it too.

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I'm with Babbs on this. You had a piece of cake. Was it the best plan? No. Can you move forward from here? Yep! Go back to plan. Eating as low in refined foods and carbs as possible will likely help you heal from the chemo too. Prayers for you.

Kim

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Chemo prayers to you. As a person who owns a cake company, ANYONE with news like that gets a free pass on cake. Hugs to you.

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Free pass! Of course you did something to show yourself some love-you just slipped and did it your old way. Maybe next time you need some self love get a facial. You obviously already committed to take care of yourself since you got the surgery-this ol' cancer is just a blip! Hugs to you...

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First, You are in my thoughts and prayers.

Second, we have ups and downs... Cake with cancer could be a little of both. I agree - it's amazing that you posted. I would not have the courage to post and own up to my mistake (and I did one last week with a chocolate nugget - there I did it). Take this as a point of reflection and move on. You have a new journey - don't let food get in your way. Focus on what you need and take it... food you do not need.... trust us, we know.

Good luck and please keep us up to date on how you are doing and if you need anything!!!!

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You are one amazing lady. Wishes for lots of courage and strength to you. And you definitely get the pass on the cake.

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Good for you my dear!

Wish I could have a small bite but these things are not sitting well with me.

I'll be praying for you and your strength during this period. May God turn things around in your favor.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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