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Spouse and daughter of sleever - questions about food first two weeks

Hi all! Dad is having surgery tomorrow morning, he's nervous and excited - as to be expected.

We've got all his liquids prepared and ready - my questions is (and forgive me if i posted this in the wrong area, I couldn't find any other posts addressing this)...

To all the sleevers out there,when you first came home, did certain smells affect you negatively.

We're trying to figure out what my mom should eat in the first week or two that will not make him queasy by the smell - or sad because he can't have it (like the smell of popcorn, how it instantly makes you want popcorn even when you weren't hungry).

She will be eating pretty much what he eats once he gets to solid food stage. She just wants to make sure she doesn't warm up any food that might be "offensive" - she's been eating his pre-op diet, and is cool with the no-carb no-sugar thing.

Any tips you can offer would be great. She's a super supportive wife and wants to be proactive about doing what SHE can to make the process easy.

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  • VSGAnn2014
    VSGAnn2014

    Uh, yeah ... the obvious first: get rid of all candy bowls. Permanently. I'll offer a little different take on this: Y'all are being very sweet to ease his way into post-op life. Way to go!

  • andreaharper
    andreaharper

    Hi Ann! Thanks for your thoughts - and congrats! I completely agree - and i'm sure my mom has already removed the candy bowls, i'll ask her tomorrow when we're in the waiting room. And YES, I 100%

  • I agree! What a lucky guy he is having your guys' support! I was never one to make everyone else not eat around me because I may be "tempted". Temptation doesn't stop after the liquid phase. It's al

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my biggest thing I requested, and still do, are my trigger foods. chocolate chips Cookies, Peanut M&Ms, cake, bread, and my boyfriend and I discuss during each shopping trip what I can and can not handle being in the house. Each week and day is different for me.

Like many people will tell you, everyone is different. But I would say out of courtesy don't make or bring in any of his all time favorites.

You guys seem like you are already pretty sensitive, he is lucky to have you all on his support team.

I agree! What a lucky guy he is having your guys' support!

I was never one to make everyone else not eat around me because I may be "tempted". Temptation doesn't stop after the liquid phase. It's all day, every day.

Someone who has decided to have the surgery is pretty much agreeing (or at least I would hope) to not give into the things that made us fat in the first place. It's not easy, but just part of the process.

But very sweet of you to think about him. And if you think he needs rid of certain foods in the house because it makes him queasy or feels tempted, by all means. But like I said, it's just something he's going to have to get used to :)

  • Author

Congrats to both of you on your weight loss, those tickers are impressive!

Thank you for your thoughts, it's kinda what i imagined - that we'll just have to wait and see what smells make him queasy. And his all time favorites is a great idea, eliminating those - he always liked to have candy sitting around in bowls - which my mom could care less about - so getting rid of those first is a good idea.

Thanks again, we're a close family and we're all excited for him to get his life back and feel better. Hopefully I'll be able to get him on this forum post-op!!

Thanks!!

Uh, yeah ... the obvious first: get rid of all candy bowls. Permanently.

I'll offer a little different take on this: Y'all are being very sweet to ease his way into post-op life. Way to go!

But eventually (very soon, actually), your father must be responsible for his own reactions to the food discomforts and temptations that life will put in front of him.

Just sayin'.

  • Author

Hi Ann! Thanks for your thoughts - and congrats!

I completely agree - and i'm sure my mom has already removed the candy bowls, i'll ask her tomorrow when we're in the waiting room.

And YES, I 100% agree with you about Dad being responsible for everything! I feel that if he feels empowered to speak up when something makes him feel nauseas at the beginning, because he knows we will understand is a good thing. And, I can only imagine that at first, it might be nice to not have temptations around if we can control that.

Empowerment to know that he can abstain from whatever - hopefully will make him feel like he can face any situation where there will be temptations and know exactly what HE needs to do to be his best healthy self.

I'm so proud of him, and I hope he's proud of himself for taking this step.

Thanks again!

You are so sweet to simply ask this for him! He is lucky to have you and your mom by his side through this journey.

I haven't had any offensive smells since my surgery. I agree with @@Babbs and her post. I made this decision for my own well being and to get healthy. I refuse to force others to change their lives for me and my weight loss goals. I got to my beginning weight eating my old way. And in turn, I have to get to my healthy weight eating my new way. There are temptations and foods to avoid all around us. Support him like you are but don't protect him....he will be out in the world sometime without you and he will have to choose not to eat something on his own. Best of luck to you all!!

@@andreaharper

Your Dad is very lucky to have such support!

Honestly I would be surprised in the first couple of weeks if anything appeals to him at all. I did not have the sleeve but had bypass and I will say that strong smelling foods did make me nauseous but not to the point where I vomited. Those smells simply made me not want to eat anything.

My husband who is also super supportive would go eat by himself and it actually frustrated me more than the smells.

I just felt like I chose to go down this route and my family should not have to behave differently because of it. So, after a week of this I finally got him to stop hiding when he eats because it really doesn't bother me.

I hope your Dad's surgery goes very well and he is recovering and on his road to better health!

I am ten days out from surgery. I have not found any smells that bother me or as yet any that make me want to eat. I might think about something, say a hamburger after smelling one but I am not tempted at all and my tummy just plain isn't ready for one. I am sure your dad's Dr or nutritionist will help you through this step by step. Some want you on liquids for weeks and others don't. There are lots of posts here about eating. I remember there are some that say things "what are you eating two weeks out, or 4 weeks out". Lots of folks to help you and in turn your dad. Prayers all will go smoothly in the am.

  • Author

Thanks so much for all the advice, "way to gos", and support. Dad's surgery went well, he's in his hospital room now. In very little pain, and able to ambulate well.

Dr. said his stomach was bigger than most that he sees, so he feels this will be tremendously helpful for him. He's positive today, and looking forward to the future.

I appreciate the thoughts on "not wanting others to hide what they eat" or "protecting him" these are good thoughts - and reassures us of what we were already thinking.

So thanks to you all - and I wish you all continued success!!

  • 3 weeks later...
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